Post by Danny on Sept 9, 2021 15:50:15 GMT -6
As the opening video finishes, things go live to the inside of the arena as pyrotechnics go off from the stage and the camera pans around to get a shot of the Revolution fans in attendance before panning to the commentary table where Corey Graves, Mauro Ranallo, and Tom Phillips are standing by.
Mauro Ranallo: Hello everyone and welcome to Revolution! I'm Mauro Ranallo along with my broadcast partners Tom Phillips and former International Champion Corey Graves.
Tom Phillips Tonight we find who will be the new #1 one contender when Rob Conway, Tom Lawlor and OH YEAH THE WARHORSE BROTHER compete in a Triple Threat match in tonight's main event!
Corey Graves: Hashtag anyone but Warhorse. Plus as punishment which I think of as more of a reward, Buddy Murphy takes on Cm Punk. Think of the implications if Murphy can score an upset here tonight.
Mauro Ranallo: You'd have to think it'd thrust him right into title contention down the line but he has to win first. Another man who must win to keep his streak alive is Eddie Kingston. He has the Television Champion in front of him this week. Will it be game over for the streak?
Tom PhillipsAnd if that wasn't enough action, Chris Jericho made his triumphant return last week but ended up coming up short against the UWF Champion. This week he takes on the littlest underdog in UWF, Hornswoggle.
Corey Graves:I see what you did there. Still hate the both of you.
Mauro Ranallo:Up next however it's the man who retired AJ Styles at Summerslam taking on the man who has completely changed into a psychopath in recent weeks. It;'s Rey Mysterio vs Tommaso Ciampa and it's up next!
Rey Mysterio's theme hits the arena and the fans give a mixed reaction with mostly boos.
The masked superstar emerges from the back with nobody flanking him this time, a mistake that will soon prove fatal for this matchup. As the San Diego native gesticulates to the crowd at the apex of the ramp, a bald, bearded, pissed-off figure emerges from the back behind him running at a full sprint - his opponent, Tommaso Ciampa. The Sicilian decks the poor guy from behind with a full-speed lariat to the back of the head faster than you can say ‘booyaka’ and is immediately on him, throwing punches and screaming obscenities!
Tom Phillips: Jesus Christ! Someone get some security!
Corey Graves: Ciampa is simply out here making it extremely obvious that if he doesn’t get more big-money matches, more people are going to get hurt. Good on him for not sitting on his hands.
The Psycho Killer stands up, arms outstretched in an “are you not entertained” pose, just as a referee runs out from guerilla position to break up the fight. This attempt goes awry as Ciampa turns around and catches him with a pointed knee strike, sending the official crumpling to the floor! He admires his handiwork with a smirk before turning back to the luchador who is just managing to get to his feet using a guardrail. Grabbing a fistful of tights and the back of his mask, he does a full 360 before sending Rey tumbling down the ramp towards the ring and into one of the ramp lights, completely breaking it!
Mauro Renallo: Oh my god!
Corey Graves: Kill! Kill! Kill!
The fans at this point are livid, having paid good money to see matches actually happen, but Tomasso just dusts his hands off and pats himself on the back, slowly and methodically stepping down the aisleway. He nonchalantly picks Rey up by the back of his mask with one arm, dragging him across the floor before hoisting him up into the ring. As he walks up the steel steps one by one the ref stops him on the apron, putting a body in between him and his potentially injured competitor. Ciampa steps through the ropes and lurches towards Mysterio but the official holds him back. After a small struggle, he finally throws his hands up and backs into his own separate corner.
Rey slowly and gingerly gets up to his hands and knees in the corner, nursing his wounds. Broken rib, dislocated shoulder, dozens of things could have potentially gone wrong on that gnarly impact. The ref turns his attention to Mysterio, attempting to signal to staff to send someone out to check on him. Mysterio simply waves him off and demands that the ref start the match.
Tom Phillips: I really don’t know if Rey is fit to continue this.
Corey Graves: If he’s stupid enough to ask for the match after all this, then he deserves whatever happens to him. If it were me in this ring I would have hopped the guardrail by now.
It takes a bit of convincing, but the referee finally reluctantly obliges.
DING DING DING!
Immediate running high knee into the turnbuckles. Rey falls back into a seated position in the corner and Ciampa is back on him immediately, hitting him over and over again with face washes, scraping his boot across his face. The ref begins the count and Ciampa utilizes every single second of it to rend the luchador’s visage. He steps away, again throwing his hands up in a bid to keep the match going, before hitting the ropes. He gathers all his momentum behind one deadly strike and channels it into yet another boot scrape across the face! The impact nearly rips the mask straight off his face, jerking the smaller man’s head and neck off to one side as he comes to an abrupt stop in the corner.
He laughs as the fans once again show their ire. As Mysterio lies in the corner, trying to catch his breath, Ciampa condescendingly circles back to the center of the ring and mouths off at the fans. This goes on for several seconds. Eventually, he turns his attention back to the task at hand, only to meet a faceful of hurricanrana! Rey Mysterio leg scissors him into the second rope, perfect position for his signature move! He vocalizes a little fanfare then runs the ropes! He grabs the rope! He turns through!
…
But Ciampa catches his legs!
Ciampa just shakes his head no as Rey stares in bewilderment, awkwardly clinging onto the ropes sideways. This tense moment is broken up by a forearm from Ciampa that has the San Diego native dangling outside of the ring, only held aloft by a single leg. His left leg. His bad leg. By a bloodthirsty wolverine bent on injury. Seems as if this was planned, because Ciampa goes right to work on this bad limb. He snakes his legs around Rey’s bad leg before falling backwards and twisting his hips, employing a sort of primitive heel hook hung over the second rope!
Mauro Renallo: Tomasso Ciampa employing a submission typical of his long time rival, Filthy Tom Lawlor.
Corey Graves: Of course he is. By doing this he’s saying that he can do the same fancy schmancy UFC BS that Tom can.
Tom Phillips: Let’s focus on the facts at hand, which is that a hold like this for any amount of time can destroy your knee!
The shooting pain coursing up and down Rey’s leg snaps him back to reality as he begins flailing about, looking for anything he can grasp onto to help alleviate the stress. The referee immediately begins the count.
1!
Ciampa begins screaming “TAP!” Not like it would mean anything halfway outside the ring.
2!
3!
Rey is pulling at the ring apron at this point, knee reduced to bubblegum and toothpicks.
4 - HEY LET GO!
The ref pulls at him after he begins to viciously torque at the joints over and over again, applying even more pressure. He relinquishes the hold, allowing Mysterio to fall to the floor in a heap. As soon as he does so he climbs to his feet with the quickness and gets in the referee’s face, telling him to stay the hell out of his business.
Tom Phillips: This man is clearly unhinged…
Booes echo throughout the arena. He turns back to the fans. The booes are met with a scream. “THIS IS WHO THEY PUT AGAINST ME?” Rey yet again denies a referee stoppage in the meantime, trying to find any sort of footing against the announce desk. The 10 count begins.
1!
2!
Ciampa cuts it short by rolling out to the floor and hitting a chop block on him, sending Mysterio right back down to the floor. The masked man screams out, clutching his leg. A front facelock is all that’s there to move him as his leg has completely given out. And that it does, closer to the ring and more specifically the ring post between hardcam and the announce desk. He grabs his mask and screams dead into his face, basically incoherent at this point. A throat slit gesture is all that warns the crowd of the impending carnage. Still holding on to his mask, Ciampa uses it to swing him around, slamming him into the ring post knee-first!
It cuts to replays as Ciampa yells at a particularly loud fan. The slow motion catches a frightening look of Rey's left knee getting swung into the post. It then goes back to the heel hook over the second rope.
Corey Graves: If he wasn't gonna need assistance getting to the back before, he sure is now!
Tom Phillips: Man, why is everyone in this company such a horrible person?
It cuts back to live feed where Ciampa has muscled Mysterio back into the ring. It isn't long before he's right over him. Rey grabs at him, trying to get up without putting weight on the bad leg, but the Psycho Killer does the job for him, lifting him into the powerbomb position before dropping him on the knees! Project Ciampa! He nonchalantly crawls into the cover.
1!
2!
3!
Tom Phillips: Damnit! Not like this!
Here is your winner, Tomasso Ciampa!
He gets to his feet and jerks away as the ref tries to raise his hand, immediately leaving the ring and heading back up the ramp with a look of dead seriousness on his face. It cuts back to replays, this time showing the lariat from behind that started it all and then the throw into the stage light.
Mauro Renallo: It should have all been over after this, the referee should have thrown it out, but Rey Mysterio valiantly tried to get a real bout underway and it cost him.
Corey Graves: You say valiantly, I say stupidly. There's no titles on the line, there's no major implications, he just risked injury in an exhibition match.
It cuts back as medical staff try to pull Rey out onto a stretcher. He shakes his head no though and just sits on the apron. Finally, he hops off, and, leaning on a probably-wrestler-in-training member of staff, he hobbles to the back on his own two (one) feet (foot) in defiance, eliciting a cheer from the raucous audience.
Tom Phillips: You love to see it.
Mauro Renallo: Stay with us - you won't want to miss what we have in store for you next.
Revolution heads elsewhere.
The scene opens up with King Hornswoggle sitting on a king bed with his girl stuffed Barbie dolls that have the names “Billie Kay” and “Tom Lawler” written on them along with their faces taped on them.
Why hello, it’s your favorite King Hornswoggle relaxing in his comfortable bed with his two beautiful pumpkin pies. I am just hanging out with my women and I want to send a message to my buddy Chris Jericho before our match. I honestly just want to say I am glad you enjoy my performance. I have appreciated your comments and praise as well from all these other people in the kingdom. I have done well to serve my fellow servants and peasants in my kingdom. As for you my buddy. We are going to have a lot of fun because we are going to party all night long. We are going to rock and roll in our undies like I have done with my thunder buddy Warhorse. Yes, I heard the people love our music Chris.
I honestly can’t wait to perform our song live together because these people love their beloved king so much.. They cannot get enough of me. So Jericho, I hope you enjoy your last night as the band leader because I will become the new band leader of Fozzy tonight! I will take them to new heights and rule the whole universe with my bare hands! See you soon Jericho baby! You will experience a huge moment like this ever again because King Hornswoggle is the former greatest UWF TV Champion and you will never ever……...forget about me again!
The scene opens with the man in the mask looking at the screen with the background in total darkness.
Hello UWF, you have been warned so many times. It’s too bad that nobody has ever listened to these warnings. You all ignore it like it is some kind of joke. You all will have no choice to face consequences for your actions. There won’t be anything that can save you now. No matter how hard you try, you will have no choice but to pay your debt to the Grim Reaper himself! It is about time that everyone knows who to bow down because your blood and broken bones of your corpse are a huge sacrifice to his holy cause. Tonight, it is the beginning of the end for you all. It’s time for a new era. The era of destruction begins right now. You all will witness the total destruction of decrepitated bodies burning in the flames of hell and people screaming for mercy. What is left of them is their blood taken away by the bite of the Monster and their limbs being torn apart by him. It doesn’t matter who you are. He doesn’t care how many championship gold that you have won.
He could care less how tough of a fighter you are in the streets or in the ring. He doesn’t give a damn about your personal life or demons. The only thing that he cares about is taking your breath away from your lifeless body while I leave you screaming in pain in that very ring. I am going to squeeze the living life out of you and make sure you have no air to breathe. Come Revolution, I am coming for what belongs to me. The Monster is here. It’s time to pay your debts to the Grim Reaper right now! Nowhere to run or hide. I am always watching and watching your back! Because you won’t know what hit you! Beware! The era of destruction and darkness covering UWF begins right now!
The scene fades and ends with the mystery man giving an evil laugh while pointing a gun signal to his head!
We head back down to the ring where Eddie Kingston is already in the ring warming up for his match.
The arena lights start flashing red, white and blue, as the titan tron comes to life with the largest advertisement for the Alpha Academy.
The American Alpha himself, The UWF Television Champion, Chad Gable steps out, looking far impressive under all the lights, and glamour of the Alpha Academy. He smiles and takes in the sea of people around him before raising his arm in the here and shouting "FOR THE ACADEMY!" The smile never leaves his face as he marches to the ring. He takes a moment on the ramp and slaps his baby, his championship, with his hand before giving the crowd another Alpha Pose
Tony Chimel: Weighing in at 202 pounds, The American Alpha.. The UWF Television Champion, Chad Gable!!
Chad has made it to the ring and has ascended the steps just like how he ascended the podium at the Olympics. He wipes his feet on the apron before entering because he respects the mat. Probably more than anything, He is the most respectful. He gives the fans what they want and desire one more time and gives them a pose from the corner. The camera flashes are almost blinding as everyone tries to get the perfect shot of the absolute specimen in the ring, The truth is that every shot of Chad is the perfect shot though. He takes the best pictures. Better than anyone else. He jumps down and is ready. He is ready.
DING! DING! DING!
We're live, and immediately Chad shoots towards Kingston. This catches Kingston off guard, as Gable is able to clutch at the heel of Kingston. However the street mentality of Kingston comes into full swing as he counters Chad with a powerful left. This causes the former Olympian to stagger backwards. A smirk slides across Kingston as he returns forward with another left, before slapping Gable directly across the face.
COREY GRAVES: That's not the way to treat an Alpha!
MAURO RANALLO: Say what you want Corey, I think Kingston is enjoying himself out there.
Gable would shake his head in frustration as he would shoot to Kingston, slapping him across the face. The two men at this point would lock up, with Gable getting the first juncture of movement, wrapping his arms around the forehead of Kingston. Gable would tighten the hold, adjusting his foot over the heel of Kingston, using his wrestling skills to take Kingston off his feet. Showing his true talent, Gable adjusts his frame over Kingston, attemping to hold down Kingston.
ONE!
TWO!
KINGSTON GETS A SHOULDER UP!
COREY GRAVES: Say what you will about Kingston, it's going to take a little bit more than a basic pin to take out him.
MAURO RANALLO: His ability to adapt is unlike anybody else in this company, Corey. Give credit to Gable, using his knowledge. That's why he's our television champion.
Gable would irately send a few punches to the face of Kingston, before getting back to his vertical base. He would attempt to send a boot, but Kingston would catch it, pushing Gable against the ropes. Gable would rebound, only to be met with a ura-nage. Kingston would find himself in the prone position this time, sending a few shots across the body, and face of Gable. Almost as if to return the favor from the previous gestures just moments earlier. Gable would push off Kingston, getting back to his base quickly. The two men stare at one another before shooting at one another once more. Gable would meet Kingston with a left, who would retort with a right. This would follow by several exchanges from the two men, before Gable would kick Kingston in the abdomen. Kingston would chop Gable across his chest, before sending a knee of his own into his foes chest. Kingston would then grab the arm of Gable, whipping him against the ropes. Kingston would follow this up by making his way to Gable. The television champion would retort with a boot, but Kingston would send several stiff shots into the chest of Gable, before pulling him close with a belly-to-belly suplex. Kingston would hold onto Gable, pulling himself together, lifting himself and Gable back to their base. Kingston pushes off Gable, before adjusting his body in a full 360 degree turn. BACKFIST TO THE FUTURE! It connects right on the dot. Gable is dropped. Kingston covers.
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
COREY GRAVES: That was some quick work from Kingston here tonight. I expected more from someone representing the Alpha Academy.
MAURO RANALLO: I think Gable just met an on-game Eddie Kingston. Gable is still our television champion, and he's got a lot going for him. Like it or not, Kingston is walking out here tonight as the victor.
The titantron switches from the UWF Revolution graphic to a live feed from backstage. CM Punk and Samoa Joe are shown walking into the building from the underground parking lot. Passing by crates and crew members busy at work, the tandem is soon confronted by a newcomer to the backstage correspondent roster.
Patrick: Excuse me gentlemen, may I have a quick few words?
The big Samoan doesn't even bother to bounce the little Irish man. He and Punk just keep walking down the hall, with the Champ noting...
Punk: I feel like they bring in a new one every few weeks. What's wrong with Renee? She's great at this. Just let her take of it.
Joe: Right?
Kevin Patrick scurries around to catch up with them.
Patrick: Please Mister... uh... Punk... and um... Joe... its just that I'd like to put in a good showing with the brass early on here.
Joe: I'm sure you would.
They all pause as two crew members cross in front of them from a different hallway, carrying a heavy set piece between them. While they wait, Punk sighs and turns to Kevin.
Punk: Alright man, we've got a couple seconds here. One question. Make it count.
Kevin smiles, delighted. He straightens his tie and clears his throat while blitzing through a mental checklist of all the tricks of the trade he learned back at broadcast school.
Punk: Time's ticking, Kev. These boys aren't gonna be here all day.
Patrick: Right. Of course. So my question for you, Mister Punk, is this - what are your thoughts heading into your first ever encounter with the "Aussie W.M.D.", Buddy Murphy.
Joe shakes his head, astonished, while Punk just rolls his eyes.
Punk: My thoughts? Kev, buddy, I cut a promo on the kid just the other day. I thought I was pretty clear. You gotta do your homework, man.
Patrick looks absolutely dejected. The crew members pass by and Punk and Joe just keep walking, leaving Kevin standing alone in the hallway. They make it a few steps before Joe gives Punk a look like Frodo gives Gandalf when the kids are sad he doesn't do any fireworks when he shows up in the Shire on his little wagon. Charitable soul that he is, Punk relents, calling back over his shoulder.
Punk: Alright Kevn, I'll give ya some thoughts.
Perking right back up, Kevin Patrick chases them down and shoves his mic right up by the Champ's face as they walk and talk like Sorkin's writing this stuff.
Punk: Look... obviously Buddy Murphy's a helluva hand, but up until this week, the guy had no ambition of ever stepping in the ring with me. This company has three championships but only one that matters, and if you're gunning for that gold, you probably don't have what it takes to ever hold it. Now Buddy's trying to make the best out of a bad situation. EC3 is punishing him for being a dickhead last week by booking him against me. Buddy's trying to angle it like some it's some big opportunity that just fell in his lap but deep down he knows just like me and Joe know that at best, that's survival instinct kicking in. It's a brave face in front of something he still isn't ready for.
A lotta people'll try to tell you that backing a man into a corner makes him dangerous, and there's something too that. But more than anything, it makes them predictable. Buddy has nothing to lose except his consciousness and everything to gain. He's gonna come out swinging with everything he's got. All the best stuff. Thing is, I know all of his best stuff because I've got a subscription to New Japan World, too. He's got some good ideas, but none that are original, and under all that is a man who doesn't actually believe in himself yet. I call that an easy night at the office.
Patrick: Mmm. And uh... any ideas on which man might win the Number One Contender's match tonight?
Phil shoots a side eye down at the tenacious interviewer.
Punk: You're pushing your luck, Kev. But as it so happens, yeah, I do. It'll probably be Lawlor, I hope its Warhorse and I'm not gonna be surprised when Conway steals it. Anyway you slice it, though, I'm happy. We've got three of the company's top talents slugging it out for a shot at the only legitimate title on the show. I hope it brings it out the best in them.
Then again, tough situations have a funny way of exposing weakness. It's human nature to look for the easy way out. Takes a special kind of conviction to get beyond that. Ya know, the diference between me and these guys is how bad I want to be the Best in the World. It's not hours spent in the gym. It's not staying up late, scheming game plans. It isn't even studying tape and learning new holds. If it were all about athletics or toughness, how'd guys like Cesaro or Shibata ever get knocked off? How'd guys like Marseglia and Sweeney and Wyatt stay on top for so long? Its the intangible quality of necessity. So which of these guys is gonna grow up and get rid of their distractions and their gimmicks and their bullshit, dig deep and come up with the shit it takes to step to the UWF Champ?
Kevin leaves the mic dangling in front of Punk's face, but he just shrugs.
Punk: You tell me.
Having arrived at their locker room, Punk and Joe step inside. The Samoan slams the door shut behind them, leaving Kevin Patrick out in the cold. Still, he looks giddy as all heck to have gotten the scoop. He runs down the hall, clicking his heels like Billy Elliot as Revolution continues elsewhere.
We head back to the ring where Chris Jericho is already there ready for his opponent.
Chimel: Next... from Dublin, Ireland... weighing in at 147 pounds... The King, Hornswoggle!
"Down With The King" by Run DMC hits as King Hornswoggle come out to a chrous of boos and he smiles wearing his crown. He walks down the entrance ramp waving all to his peasants as he turns to the right and he walk up the steel steps. He walk along the ropes as he stops and he slides under the ring ropes.
VS 
DING DING DING
Hornswoggle walks to the center of the ring and starts to shred on some air guitar. Jericho plays along like if he's actually hearing some good tunes. Chris then puts his hand up to tell him to stop and starts wailing on his own air guitar. The fans cheer for Jericho's rendition and Swoggle gets a bit jealous, coming over and doing his own air guitar right in front of him, the two duking it out like they're playing Guitar Hero.
Mauro Ranallo: It's Battle of the Bands here on Revolution!
Tom Phillips: Jericho's got more experience in a band so I think he takes this one.
Corey Graves: Is this really what we've come to?
Swoggle is clearly getting beat and so he stops and takes Jericho's invisible guitar and starts smashing it to boos from the crowd. Jericho looks disrespected and just kicks Swoggle right in the face! Swoggle rolls around on the mat and Jericho looks to the crowd. He might be feeling a bit bad so he walks over and helps pick him up, dusting him off a bit. The self proclaimed King of UWF ends up stomping on Chris' foot causing him to lean down only to jump up and nail him with a DDT! He makes the cover!
1 . . .
Jericho kicks out right away! Swoggle gets on top of him and starts hammering away with shots but Jericho isn't that affected by them and shoves the little man off of him. Swoggle pops right back up to his feet while Jericho is slightly dazed. He's up to a knee when The King comes running over. Swoggle takes a big swing but Jericho pushes himself back to avoid it, taking Swoggle from his back and hitting a mini German Suplex! Swoggle is still tossed across the ring and looks like he's seeing stars. He still fights to his feet however just shoves him back down with his boot before grabbing his little legs and turning him over. He's going for the Walls of Jericho but Swoggle's legs don't quit reach up to his arms. Jericho pulls up on his legs and Swoggle is able to somehow use his core strength to swing under his legs and sit up to start biting him in the face!
Corey Graves: Well it was a nice return for Jericho but now it looks like he's going to die from rabies.
Jericho stands up tall and tries to get Swoggle off of him with some punches but it's not working. He instead pops his hips back to deliver a Northern Lights Suplex! Swoggle rolls out onto the apron to prevent himself from getting pinned but Jericho comes over to bring him back in. He grabs Swoggle by the ear like he's been a bad kid and drags him back to the center of the ring. Swoggle however comes forward and gives him a headbutt to the gut! Jericho falls to his knee, the wind briefly taken out of him. Swoggle sees and advantage and steps back a few paces to help build some steam as he charges at the former UWF Champion. Jericho however spins around and delivers a massive Judas Effect! Swoggle goes down and Jericho makes the pin!
1 . . .
2 . . .
3 . . .
Tony Chimel: Here is your winner, Chris Jericho!
Jericho looks down at Hornswoggle and out to the crowd and shrugs with a smile on his face. He celebrates his win as the show moves on.
We see the Warhorse walking past the frame, he has no interest talking to cameras right now as he’s got a hefty opportunity on his horizon. He’s behind the curtain, dressed and ready to fight tonight. A few people pass the camera too, but the camera stays focused on the Warhorse.
The Warhorse paces back around, and turns to face the camera frame, clearly changing his mind about ignoring the camera. He looks right towards the lens.
WARHORSE: I DON’T HAVE A FUCKING CLUE WHAT PEOPLE EXPECT FROM ME THESE DAYS. I WALK ENDLESSLY, I PREPARE FOR MY MATCHES AND I GO OUT THERE AND I DO ALL I CAN. AT THE END OF THE DAY I DON’T KNOW HOW IT’LL ALL CATCH UP TO ME. MAYBE I’LL JUST FADE AWAY AS IT’S ALL SAID AND DONE, MAYBE IT WON’T MATTER.
I MEAN LOOK AT THE HISTORY BOOKS, HOW DOES THE WARHORSE STAND OUT? IS IT REALLY A HALL OF FAME CAREER? I SURE AS HELL KNOW PEOPLE WHO HAVE ACHIEVED THAT IN A HELLUVA LOT LESS TIME. OVER A YEAR I’VE CONSISTENTLY BEEN HERE, AND I’VE NEVER SHIED FROM A CHALLENGE. WHAT DO I HAVE TO SHOW FOR IT?
The Warhorse paces.
JUST MY REPUTATION, MY WORD, MY CREDIBILITY. HOW MUCH DOES THAT SET IN IN THE GREATER SCHEME OF THINGS? I MEAN THE GREATER SCHEME ON THIS PATH WILL SAY, “THE WARHORSE HELD THE INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP ONCE AND LOST IT IN HIS SECOND DEFENSE TO SETH ROLLINS”. DOES THAT RING OUT LIKE KEVIN STEEN? DOES THAT RING OUT LIKE LARRY SWEENEY? SO MANY GREATS, AND THEY’RE BACKED BY THEIR RECORD.
TONIGHT RESTS ON THE POTENTIAL THAT I CAN CHANGE MY PATH, THAT I CAN BE MORE THAN JUST WHAT I AM. HELL, REGARDLESS OF TONIGHT THE PATH DOESN’T GUARANTEE THAT LEGITIMISATION. I KNOW I’LL HAVE TO FIGHT AND FIGHT AND FIGHT UNTIL THIS BODY NO LONGER LETS ME.
The Warhorse, breaking tone, smiles.
BUT AS THEY ALWAYS TOLD ME BACK IN ST LOUIS, THAT’S THE TYPE OF BUSINESS I SIGNED UP FOR. AND I LOVE IT. TONIGHT, ROB CONWAY AND TOM LAWLOR FACE A MAN WITH NOTHING TO LOSE, AND ALL TO PLAY FOR, BUT THIS AIN’T NO CHILD’S PLAY.
The Warhorse walks off, heading elsewhere. The spirit of the Warhorse ramped up more than it had been previously due to his grief, including denial, over losing the UWF Intercontinental Championship to Seth Rollins. Just like him, we head elsewhere.
Rob Conway: Tonight is the night it finally happens. Tonight is the night my rightful opportunity will be gained and 'The Conman' will have his shot at the UWF Champion, CM Punk. All 'The Conman' has to do?, beat the guy I beat last week and put the WARHORSE down. See Ethan Carter might think he's stacked the deck against 'The Conman' - like he often does - by banning The Con-Tourage from ringside. But here's the thing, 'The Conman' always has a plan and 'The Conman' isn't going to let the con-spiracies of Ethan Carter get in the way of his shot at glory. What is the plan you might ask?, well it's real simple, see 'The Conman' is a highly optimised athlete thanks to Simon Dean and 'The Conman' is also decked out in the finest wares courtesy of Sylvan - but at the end of the day, when it comes to in-ring?, that's all Rob Conway. It was Rob Conway that beat UWF Hall of Famer AJ Styles when he first step foot in the door and it was Rob Conway that took the Television Championship to new heights all on his own. So do I need The Con-Tourage to win this match? - god no, 'The Conman' beats these two clowns with his eyes shut.
Conway lowers his sunglasses and pauses for thought. He looks up and has a great intensity in his eyes as he stares a hole through the camera.
'The Conman' is laser focused. Focused on one goal and one goal only and that is to be the UWF Champion. It's where 'The Conman' belongs and it's time everyone else recognises this. Last week I beat Tom Lawlor, fair and square, three count middle of the ring. His threats are exactly that, threats - empty and nothing more than the crazed ramblings of a man that's been kicked upside the head too many times. And WARHORSE?, the less said the better. See these guys, guys like Lawlor, guys like WARHORSE... hell, guys like CM Punk - they're simply not on the same level as Rob Conway. I'm bigger, stronger, faster, better looking, better talking and altogether a much more complete superstar and quite frankly 'The Conman' is the only man around here who is truly World Champion material. So Punk, I hope you're watching - and I hope you're taking notes on 'The Conman' because I'm your next opponent and I'm the man who's going to end the Summer of Punk, end your championship reign and show the whole world what a real champion should look like. Lawlor and WARHORSE are just roadblocks and I'm about to run through them like only 'The Conman' can, and that's not the right way, that's not the wrong way - that's the CON-WAY... 'Conman' out.
Murphy calm as can be walks onto the ramp as the sounds of Blue Stahil plays right throughout the arena it drowns out the crowds reaction, Murphy walks out head held high as he measures up the crowd, Murphy looks towards the ring as he slowly makes his way to the ring...
Tony Chimel: On his way to the ring, Buddy Murphy, The AUSSIE W.M.D...
Murphy gets to the ring where he steps back a moment before sliding under the ropes and posing for the crowd, He lifts up his head as he looks to the crowd...
Murphy goes through the middle rope as he moves to his corner where he sits on the turnbuckle as he waits for the match to begin, Murphy looks on as Kay and Sonya look on already at ringside...
P U N K
The UWF Champion marches purposefully out on to the ramp, strobe lights flashing in time with the pulsing rhythm of "Digging for Windows". With his name spread big and bold up on the titantron, Punk takes a knee and checks the invisible wrist watch to confirm the time. Love him or hate him, the fans all scream along when he announces that it's Clobberin' Time!
Chimel: Making his way to the ring... being accompanied by Samoa Joe... from Chicago, Illinois... weighing in at 218 pounds... The UWF Champion... CM PUNK!
The brooding Samoan Submission Machine comes trailing behind Punk as he walks down the ramp. Fans reaching over the barricade for high-fives or booing all the way up in the nosebleeds are ignored all the same. The Renaissance is realized. This is a man who has re-established himself as Best in the World and he knows out. He carries himself with bulletproof confidence, daring any and all comers to take their shot. While Samoa Joe takes his place at the corner of the apron, CM Punk climbs into the squared circle, ready to compete.
VS 
DING DING DING
Punk calmly places his UWF Championship in the corner but Murphy isn't waiting for opportunities. He runs right up and dropkicks Punk in the back causing him to ram shoulder first into the steel ring post! If that wasn't bad enough, Murphy pulls Punk away onto the throw him right back into the post! Punk turns around and falls to a seated position as Buddy backs off. He's only backed away however to create some room for him to get a running start on the Dropkick in the corner! Punk looks dazed as Murphy drags him away from the ropes for the first pin of the match!
1 . . .
2 . . .
Punk kicks out! Murphy pulls Punk back up to his feet and places his head between his legs. He lifts him up for a powerbomb but Punk starts punching him in the top of his head, getting free. Punk delivers a Spinning Heel Kick to the gut of Murphy's followed by hooking both his arms in a double underhook. He flips him over with the Welcome to Chicago Mother Fucker! Murphy however rolls out to the apron to escape a pin attempt. Punk comes over and bends over the ropes to pull Murphy up but Buddy grabs his head and hangs him up on the top rope! Punk turns away grabbing at his throat as Murphy comes back into the ring. Punk turns to face him but he eats a running Knee Strike right to the face! Punk eats the knee and rolls out of the ring.
Mauro Ranallo: Punk may have taken his opponent too lightly going into this.
Corey Graves: Punk's hubris is his biggest asset but also greatest flaw.
Punk tries to walk it off but he doesn't see that Murphy has charged across the ring leaps over the ropes, taking out Punk with a Senton! Murphy starts kicking him while he's down and Joe comes over to get in his face. Murphy doesn't back down and goes right to picking up Punk and throws him back into the ring. Buddy climbs up onto the apron and goes to the top rope. He looks right at Joe as if to tell him there's nothing he can do about it. He jumps off as Punk rises to his feet and hits the Meterora! Punk's head is driven into the mat and Murphy hooks both legs for a deep cover!
1 . . .
2 . . .
Punk kicks out! Buddy brings him back up and starts giving Punk some forearms, backing him into the corner. The ref makes the count of 4 and so Murphy backs off to the opposite corner. He comes running across the ring looking for the big boot in the corner but Punk rolls out of the way just in time! Murphy gets his boot stuck over the top rope and Punk takes advantage of that by hitting the Running Knee in the corner to the back of the head! Instead off the bulldog he follows it up with a Neckbreaker! Murphy is down and Punk right away goes to the top rope. Buddy hasn't moved and Punk comes off the top with the Elbow Drop right to the heart! He makes the pin!
1 . . .
2 . . .
Murphy kicks out!
Tom Phillips: Punk has found his way back into this match after a small mistake from Buddy Murphy.
Mauro Ranallo: It wasn't even a mistake. Punk is a world class athlete who was able to take advantage out of nowhere. That's what World Champions are made of.
Punk picks Murphy back up and lifts him onto his shoulders! Buddy starts kicking his feet and slips up behind Punk. The UWF Champion turns around and eats a Jumping Knee right to the face! The staggers Punk who stumbles over to the ropes. Murphy runs at him and hits a Clothesline over the ropes! Punk however lands on the apron. Murphy goes to grab him but delivers a forearm shot to the face. Buddy retreats to the center of the ring so Punk springboards in looking for the clothesline. Murphy manages to scout it though and retaliates with a Dropkick taking Punk out in mid air! Punk rolls to the corner and uses the ropes to try and get himself up. Murphy takes a page out of Punk's book and comes charging with the running knee. Punk slightly ducks just in time and Murphy's knee sails right above him but Punk scoops him up onto his shoulders! Punk pulls him away from the ropes and Murphy tries to break free by punching him but the UWF Champion throws him up and smashes his knee into his face, putting him right to sleep! Punk makes the cover!
1 . . .
2 . . .
3 . .
Tony Chimel: Here is your winner, the UWF Champion, CM Punk!
The UWF Champion gets handed his title. He raises it up high and looks down at Murphy, slightly surprised by the challenge but still his confidence was well earned. He and Joe head to the back as the show moves on.
The titantron cuts to Ciampa sitting backstage
Ciampa: To quote our ever magnanimous UWF Champion, “Do I have everybody’s attention now”, after what I did to Fuego last week and Rey this week, i’d really hope so or else I don’t know what else i’m going to need to do to get that attention, maybe visit Rey in the hospital later.
Ciampa moves in his seat, not taking his eyes off the camera.
Ciampa: You know its a real shame what I had to do to Rey tonight, maybe if our general manager, EC3 had better security I wouldn’t of been able to jump Rey that easily before our match, was it a cowardly thing for me to, yeah it was, do I regret it, the hell I do, god you people have no idea how great it feels to let loose every now and then, so sorry Rey that I did that to you but you were the perfect target to send a message to Ethan.
Ciampa gets up and paces back and forth
Ciampa: See the message I wanted to send Ethan was that the UWF is currently in a perpetual state of chaos, you have guys being attacked before matches, during matches and after matches and its a chaos I intend to continue, until I stop being overlooked on this brand. Tom Lawlor loses last week and gets put into a contenders match tonight , Murphy attacks Tom last week and gets a match with the champion, its non title sure but its still a match against the fucking champion.
Ciampa is red in the face with anger, emotion is starting to break through his calm façade.
Ciampa: What do I get huh, I win last week, I don’t get a match with Punk or a contender match spot, I decimated Fuego last week and what do I get, a broken old man not worth his salt in this industry anymore, a guy resting on his laurels so he doesn’t actually need to work for it anymore, I'm one of the best going today and you have me fighting the damn rejects and has beens, well no more Ethan.
Ciampa stops pacing and breathes.
Ciampa: I’m making a promise too you Ethan, I better stop being overlooked tonight and get what I deserve or who knows what else i’ll do tonight, you saw what I did to Rey, that was merely a sneak peak, you don’t want to see the whole film Ethan, trust me on that one, time’s ticking my friend and like I said we still got a whole night ahead of us, who knows what’s going to happen.
With that Ciampa smirks towards the camera and walks off screen.
The scene opens up to a distorted voices of school yard girls singing ominous songs together.
“It’s raining, it’s pouring.
The old man is snoring.
He bumped his head on the top of the bed,
And couldn’t get up in the morning.”
“Row, row, row your boat,
Gently down the stream.
Merrily, merrily, merrily,
Life is but a dream.”
“All around the Mulberry Bush,
The monkey chased the weasel.
The monkey stopped to pull up his sock,
POP!! Goes the weasel…”
The feed starts to return to normal and the distorted voices vanished, but a masked figure appears in front of what looks to be an abandoned house. Half of the house appears to be rotted out, and the other half looks to be in mint condition. The masked figure walks up to get in better view of the camera, all while holding a very large gas can that appears to be empty. The figure begins to laugh in a sinister way with a wicked tone while placing the gas can on the ground. The camera zooms in on the house while the mad man is laughing, and the house is dripping all over, it appears to be wet by some sort of clear liquid. There is also a light explosive on the roof of the house. The camera pans around and shows multiple empty cans and containers of gas before going back to the masked man laughing hysterically. His laughing finally subsides, and he pulls his mask up to the top of his skull where it sits atop his hair. The masked man is none other than the brand-new Intercontinental Champion: Seth Rollins.
Seth Rollins: I searched high and low for this satanic structure and after many long hours: I finally found it. The home where the devil sleeps and where the wicked weep. And soon, the world will watch this horrible place disintegrate into ashes and the ground, it will seep, into. Perhaps the Fiend will Rest in Peace, or maybe he will have to suffer for not allowing others to have peace.
Either way, adios, you are your reign of dominance was great. But there is a new sheriff and a new beast in town. May you fade away like into the sunset like the unwanted virus that you are.
Seth then pulls out a lighter, flicks it, and drops it on a thick wet trail of gasoline that lies near his feet. The gas immediately catches a blaze and begins to travel quickly to the house. A gigantic explosion occurs, and the entire house is quickly engulfed in flames. The firefly fun house is no more, and Seth Rollins begins to laugh hysterically once again.
The scene fades away as Seth continues to laugh like a mad man.
P U N K
For the second time this evening, "Digging for Windows" hits the PA. Punk strolls down the ramp, minus all the usual pomp and circumstance. He's freshly showered and wearing a sport coat over his street clothes like Ellen Degeneres might. He's hurries down the ramp, not wanting to make a big fuss as he circles the ring and joins the fellas at the commentary table.
Ranallo: Oh wow! Ladies and gentlemen, it seems we have a special guest joining us on commentary for this evening's main event.
Graves: Cause a four-man booth never feels too crowded.
The Champ dons a headset and sits down at the end of the table.
Phillips: Welcome! What brings you out here?
Punk: Well I thought I'd get a front row seat for the match that'll decide my first challenger. I figured if Ziggler can just show up and call matches, then why shouldn't I, right?
With Punk situated with the others at ringside, Tony Chimel scales the steps and takes center stage to get things going.
Chimel: The following contest is a Triple Threat match to determine the Number One Contender for the UWF Championship! By order of the General Manager, Chael Sonnen, Simon Dean and Sylvan Grenier have been banned from ringside.
Just look at me...
The piano riff hits and the crowd immediately begin to bemoan the arrival of their least favourite superstar, Rob Conway. Before 'The Conman' appears, his stablemates Simon Dean and Sylvan walk out onto the stage and face the curtain as if to present Conway. The Referee wags a warning finger at the henchmen, who to turn to depart to the back after offering up some last minute praise for Rob. To the sound of tremendous booing 'The Conman' struts out onto the ramp full of arrogance. He's singing along to his theme music and grinning from ear to ear.
Chimel: Introducing first... making his way to the ring from New Albany, Indiana, weighing in at 234 pounds - he is 'The Conman' - Rob Conway!
Conway hops up onto the apron and turns around the face the crowd, he points to each of his abs and seems awful impressed with himself. Conway steps between the ropes and into the ring before he heads towards the hard camera, puts on foot on the middle rope and raises a single finger high in the air.
The epic sound of Wolfgang Van Halen radiated over the arena as we're immediately met with the arrival of Tom Lawlor. would make his arrival onto the scene.
Chimel: Next... from UpdateYourProfile, Nevada... weighing in at 205 pounds... "Filthy" Tom Lawlor!
Tom would give some of the people their monies, pounding a few fist, clapping a few hands -- The usual stuff, before making his way into the midst of the ring. A more determined look would creep across the face of "Filthy," Tom Lawlor. One thing was for certain, God have mercy on his opponents.
The bewildering sounds of "Raining Blood" blast through the PA, with the wailing distortion echoing through our ears. The spooky sounds continue to flow, until we peak up and then we hit the strong, driving riff coming through the speakers, as Warhose pumps through the curtain, standing off with menacing head bangs. The Warhorse sympathizers in the crowd bang their heads with ultra enthusiasm through the whole of the first two verses, as well as the MAJORITY Slayer fans, throw 'em up brother.
Chimel: And finally... weighing in tonight at 4000 lbs of Raw Heavy Metal, from St Louis, Missouiri, USA... Warhorse!
The Warhorse finishes up headbanging up at the top of the ramp, and then starts marching down to the ramp with all of the intensity in his feet in the world. Revvin' those suckers up for an ass ruling of massive proportions. He slides up onto the apron, climbing right through the ropes, and standing in the middle of the ring as we hit the chorus:
RAINING BLOOD,
FROM A LACERATED SKY,
BLEEDING IT'S HORROR,
CREATING MY STRUCTURE,
NOW I SHALL REIGN IN BLOOD.
The Warhorse headbangs like crazy as we get a bewildering Kerry King guitar solo, a true assault to the senses. He twirls from the rapid headbanging over towards the corner and as the song finishes the Warhorse stands strong waits for this one to get underway and thinks about ruling some goddamn ass, baby, brother, dude, boy.
Tony heads out while each man occupies a different corner of the squared circle. The Official does one last check to make sure none of them have brought anymore to help them in their corners, and when he's satisfied it's all good, calls for the bell.
VS 
VS 
DING DING
Warhorse looks at Lawlor. Lawlor looks at Conway. Conway looks at Warhorse. Then backwards. Then across. Classic Mexican Stand-off. You've all seen The Good, The Bad and The Ugly, right? Right? Well spoiler alert if you haven't, it's very long and a lot of it's boring and there's a part with blowing up a train bridge or something that I don't even know why they do it but in the end you've got three guys in the cemetery with that one song playing and they're all looking at each other about to kill each other. And that's where we're at here. That's the sitch. Except instead of a grave full of treasure at stake, it's a shot at the UWF Championship of the World.
Conway steps forward first, brashly reminding Lawlor that he beat him last week. Warhorse shouts over that he RULED Conway's sorry ass in the G1. Lawlor's like "yeah but I beat you that one time, pal". A true rock-paper-scissors scenario. Like Starcraft! Truly this is any man's match to win.
Rob, who obviously the Terran of this bout, waves both dudes off and steps through the ropes before dropping to the floor. He calls up to his opponents, telling them to fight among themselves to find out which is worthy of a match with him. This, of course, riles up the crowd and they boo the heck out of him. Conway ain't bothered at all.
Graves: Yeah, they'll hate him for it, but Conway's playing the smart game here. If he can get Warhorse and Lawlor to beat each other up first, he'll be well on his way to victory.
Punk: Amazing that he was able to come up with such a clever, innovative triple-threat strategy all on his own without any help from Simon Dean and Sylvan.
Phillips: THIS CHUMP IS A MAJOR LEAGUE PUSSIFIED PUSSY
YOUR WINNER...
AND NUMBER ONE CONTENDER FOR THE UWF CHAMPIONSHIP...
"FILTHY" TOM LAWLOR!
Lawlor releases the submission and slowly gets to his feet to have his hand raised. The crowd are elated to see him pick up the win, especially over Conway. Warhorse has since been taken backstage, maybe even to the local hospital. Filthy Tom marches proudly around the ring, letting the monumental moment sink in.
Ranallo: Lawlor did it! He outlasted Conway and Warhorse to establish himself as the next in line for the world title! Remarkable! Have you ever seen such a meteoric rise from a young talent?
Graves: Conway got screwed!
Phillips: ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME???
Maryse shoves Punk back and runs around the ring to be with Conway as he rolls under the bottom rope. Meanwhile, Chael Sonnen runs down the ramp to join his boy in the ring to celebrate the victory. CM Punk stays standing at ringside, eyes focused in on the man that will challenge him for his belt. Eventually Lawlor finishes with the parading and turns to look down at the Champ. He points right at him and issues some warning that's lost under the roar of the crowd and his music blaring through the PA. Punk just smiles and nods, telling him to "bring it on". Chael raises the new Contender's hand one more time as Revolution comes to a close.
END OF SHOW
Credits
Gable vs Kingston - underclass
Mysterio vs Ciampa - half
Swoggle vs Jericho, Punk vs Murphy - Danny
Lawlor vs WARHORSE vs Conway - Fauche
