Post by Danny on Dec 22, 2022 17:16:59 GMT -6
We head to the arena where the pyrotechnics go off from the stage and the camera pans around to get a shot of the Revolution fans in attendance before panning to the commentary table where Corey Graves, Mauro Ranallo, and Tom Phillips are standing by.
Tom Phillips: Hello ladies and gentlemen and welcome to the post-Slammiversary edition of Revolution! I’m Tom Phillips alongside Mauro Ranallo and former International Champion Corey Graves.
Mauro Ranallo: Speaking of a former International Champion, Tom, Eddie Guerrero makes his UWF return tonight when he takes on former rival Homicide.
Corey Graves: And the Prime Time Medal that Homicide used to hold will be up for grabs when Batista and Cody Rhodes do battle for it.
Tom Phillips: And the other three champions are in action as well. First, in non-title action, Intercontinental Champion Danhausen steps to LA Knight.
Mauro Ranallo: Also throwing down will be Television Champion Trevor Lee and Eddie Kingston.
Corey Graves: And the UWF Champion Shark Boy will mix it up with Kyle O’Reilly. All that and more Slammiversary fallout coming up!
There would be an electric feeling in the crowd, people are talking back and forth and looking forward to more UWF action. Suddenly Chimel would enter the ring and make an announcement.
Tony Chimel: Ladies and Gentlemen, allow me to introduce the man who won the number one contender triple threat and is now confirmed to be facing Shark Boy at the Royal Rumble, Tommaso Ciampa.
The crowd would pop as Like a Villain blasts over the speaker, Ciampa and DDP would walk out, the pair looking quite hyped. DDP high fiving fans as he makes his way down and Ciampa doing the same, even stopping for some photos with the fans. DDP would be wearing a t-shirt with Ciampa lifting the UWF Championship on it with the words “The Next Ciampaion” on the bottom. Getting to the ring, DDP would hold the ropes open for Ciampa and Ciampa would enter the ring, Chimel would hand him off the mic and Ciampa would pat him on the back.
Ciampa: Well I got to say, that reaction does not lose its luster. I want to thank Tony Chimel for that introduction, the best in the business at what he does and we have him here in the UWF.
Clapping for Tony, the crowd would join Ciampa in his show of appreciation.
Ciampa: I’d also like to thank the man who made sure I was at my best for Slammiversary, my coach and guru: DIAMOND DALLAS PAGE.
The crowd would cheer for the legend who would bow and accept a handshake from Ciampa before being given his own mic.
DDP: Ciampa, I may have got you there but you did all the work at the end of the day baby. At Slammiversary you remained focus, you channeled your anger into determination and in the end you got business done, didn’t he folks.
Once again the crowd would cheer and shower Ciampa in a chorus of “You deserve it”, Ciampa would stand in the middle of the ring and nod.
Ciampa: Well as always DDP you certainly know how to hype a man up and you’re right we got business done. As much as I hate to admit it, Sami Zayn was close to beating me at Slammiversary but he came up short as usual and now it’s my time to take my shot at the UWF Championship.
Eddie, brother, I know we said a lot of harsh words to each other but you truly are a great fighter but this was an opportunity for me to take and I took it, maybe next time man you will earn that opportunity again but now its time for me to shine.
This would garner a mixed reaction, the crowd happy he is sticking it to Sami but not so happy that he is undermining Kingston.
Ciampa: Now that i’ve talked about my past opponents, its time for me to talk about my future opponent and the man who beat Edge at Slammiversary, who might have just ended Edge’s career, Shark Boy. At Slammiversary man you put Edge through the ringer and he did the same to you, hell I was watching backstage, taking notes and I thought that match was never going to end because not only was the title on the line, so was both of your guys pride, if you had that towel thrown in you were admitting the other had out wrestled you and Shark Boy you proved to be the better man.
The crowd would cheer the mention of Shark Boy, Ciampa nodding in approval.
Ciampa: At the Rumble, its you and me for that UWF World Championship and I am going to forewarn you now Shark Boy, prepare for a war. This is my first opportunity for that Championship and I intend to only need that one to get it. I don’t care if its a wrestling match or a weapons match. You could lock us up in a steel cage or make us need to yell I quit, I have been yearning for this match for a full year and on the anniversary of me winning the Intercontinental Championship, i’m going to win the World Championship.
Shark Boy you earned my respect for beating a conniving bastard like Edge but you have not earned my mercy. I am going into this match to win and I will leave with that Championship. I said at Slammiversary I would be number one contender and I am now number one contender. Last Rumble I said I would leave as Intercontinental Champion and I did. This Rumble I say I am leaving as world champion and I will. See you then Sharky.
With that Ciampa would drop the mic and exit the ring, DDP patting him on the back as they head up the ramp. The pair would stop at the top and turn round, both hitting the signature DDP diamond pose as we move on in the show.
Our scene opens backstage with a man who has a huge matchup this evening...
LA Knight: Let me talk to 'ya!
LA Knight: LA Knight has been back in UWF for a little while now. And I know from the outside lookin' in, L...A....Knight hasn't had the most success. I lost to Kingston, got assaulted with a steel chair by that carny Trevor Lee. And also proceeded to not win the Television Championship at Slammiversary. Now, to a lesser man, this may come across as failures. But not to L...A...Knight. These are opportunities. For those at home that haven't been keeping track, every interaction I had since returning has had some form of Championship relevancy. Beat Austin, automatically became the Number One Contender to the Television Championship. Got into an altercation with said Champion, who only got the upper hand because I didn't want to end him right then and there. Wrestled Kingston, who was aiming to become Number One Contender to the UWF Championship. And tonight, tonight, I get the Intercontinental Champion. Anyone notice a pattern?
LA Knight: Let me break it down to you simpletons. There's a reason guys like me are put in these types of situations week in, and week out. And there's a reason why guys like Kyle O'Reilly have to beg for opportunities at a Championship that isn't even active. And that's because L...A...Knight is everything he says he is. I'm money. I'm must see. When the show is over, I'm the person everyone is talking about. And tonight, we keep that trend going. Tonight, I go out to that ring; do what I do better than everyone else and show the world that "The Namer of Dummies" is not only must see television. He's not only the most handsome man in UWF; he may very well be next in line for a shot at the Intercontinental Championship.
LA Knight: Danhausen may be very Evil, but L...A....Knight is very, very good. Maybe a little too good for our resident clown Champion. 'Ya know what they say...'ya take the good, 'ya take the bad, all it all up, what do 'ya have?
LA Knight: The facts of Life, Dummy! See 'ya out there.
And just like that, Knight walks off and the scene fades.
THE NIGHT OF SLAMMIVERSARY
The event has been nothing short of monumental thus far with great and memorable action thus far. As there’s a break in the action, things head backstage where one of the members of the UWF veteran panel, Mick Foley, is seen standing at a water cooler talking to another member of the panel in Vinny Marseglia.
Mick Foley: True story, he’s scared of cucumbers. You wouldn’t think a guy like that is scared of anything but yeah, if I’d thought to put a few slices in my mask or something maybe I would’ve have had to take the spill off that Cell!
The two share a laugh as suddenly they’re joined by none other than the Television Champion walking up.
Trevor Lee: "Pardon me for interruptin’, Mistah Foley, I just happened ta’ be walkin’ by and thought it’d be rude of me to not say somethin’ ta’ Mistah Marseglia while I had the chance.”
Mick Foley: By all means, young man.
Mick gestures towards Vinny.
Vinny Marseglia: Well I’m not sure to what I owe this surprise but I’m glad you’re here because now I can tell you to your face and not just on a panel that you’ve impressed me thus far, and it takes a lot to impress me. But here you are, not caring what you have to say to be heard and not caring what you do to be seen and as a result, you still have that Television Championship after all these months. It takes a certain type of man to pull off that type of feat around here, you and I both recognize that and that’s why, from a King to a Mayor, I want to give you something I don’t usually hand out freely: congratulations.
As soon as those words come from the mouth of one Horror King, Trevor Lee actually looks...shocked. As though this wasn't what was to be expected from a man who, from the last that had been seen of him, was one of the bloodiest, most brutal competitors in the history of the UWF. Looking askew briefly, and ensuring that Mick Foley has stepped away, Lee turns back to Vinny.
Trevor Lee: "Well, mista' Marseglia, that's mighty kind o' ya' to give some kudos my way."
Once more, Lee checks that NOBODY is around them, and looks back when it is confirmed.
Trevor Lee: "Truth be told, mista' Marseglia...you are actually a big inspiration o' mine. sir. An' I know that not many people would be so willin' to admit that to someone in the same industry as themselves, but...well, the truth is the truth, an' the truth is that I pretty much idolized ya' when I first came into this 'ere company. I mean, the way that ya' dismantled each an' every person that done gone stepped into ya' path, the way ya' carved ya' name into the record books, both metaphorically an' literally..."
As the Television Champion speaks, it would be made clear that their own nerves are only growing with each word stated, almost as though the invisible strings of paranoia are pulling at their core, trying to drag them away from saying what is on his mind towards the man who may perhaps understand him the best out of anyone in the history of the UWF...yet with but a flicker of their eyes, these cords dissipate, if only momentarily.
Trevor Lee: "...An' 'specially in the way that ya' took care o' business whenever someone got too outta' line within ya' kingdom...that was the stuff that had really gotten my gears turnin', the stuff that got my wheels spinnin', the stuff that really...really brought the absolute best outta' me."
A smile slowly settles onto the visage of the Television Champion, one that clearly isn't needing to be hidden behind any mask - it is simply a truthful, yet entirely perverse smile, as Lee mentally recounts exactly what Vinny Marseglia has done to those around them in the past.
Trevor Lee: "I-If I may, without soundin' too much like one o' those fanboys standin' in line at some hokey meet-an'-greet or whatever the h-e-double hockey stick people do nowadays to meet their own idols...I'd like to share wit' ya' what I think my absolute favorite thing that ya' 'ave ever done is to ya'...is that quite alright, King?"
Vinny Marseglia: Of course.
Being given the go-ahead, Trevor Lee takes a deep breath in...
Trevor Lee: "...It was at Wrestlemania, few years back. Not too sure on the specific year, since my personal life was...quite busy, bein' just in-au-gur-a-ted as mayor o' Harlan an' all, but there's two words that 'ave always stuck wit' me from watchin' that night..."
"...Monster's Ball."
Shuddering from just mentioning those two words, Lee continues on.
Trevor Lee: "That night...that night was the night that I first became inspired, nay, that I first started idolizin', nay, that I first became enamored, NAY...that night...that night was the first night that I became utterly obsessed wit' ya', mista' Marseglia..."
Sighing, Lee gives another genuine, yet sickening smile.
Trevor Lee: "I became one o' ya' biggest fans, whether ya' knew it or not, mista' Marseglia. Watchin' ya' pour some eighty proof into the eyes of mista' Kanemaru, cheerin' as ya' escaped from an attempt at ya' very life, a death by bludgeonin' that got given instead to El Desperado, rootin' as loud as possible when ya' darn near decapitated mista' Wyatt wit' that baseball bat...but the part that got me the most, mista' Marseglia? It was when ya' had one Minoru Suzuki starin' down a double barrel shotgun, an' ya' went an' gone done pulled that trigger without even a moment o' hesitation..."
For a second, Lee sways on his feet, practically SWOONING as he recounts the conquest of The Horror King on that faithful night, but thankfully for himself, he remains upright.
Trevor Lee: "...An' all o' that...it was all for this..."
After a beat of time, Trevor Lee holds the UWF Television Championship up towards his own face, his reflection shining off of the metal plating of the title, giving a proper look at Trevor Lee, perhaps the real Trevor Lee, one who stands before his idol with a deranged smile lining his face from ear to ear.
Vinny Marseglia: Well while I’ve never done anything I’ve done for anything more than the thrill of it, I’ve got to admit, I’m flattered. That Television Championship, when it was around my waist or on my shoulder, it might as well have been a conveyor belt because, like sheep, victim after victim was brought my way, their eyes lustfully caught in the allure of the gold and their minds swimming with fantasies and best case scenarios. And that, bursting their bubbles, was just as fun as the psychological surgery I would perform on them just speaking to them in the lead-up to the match. It was just as much fun as the physical pain I would inflict in the match itself and the blood I would shed. Yes, I knew there was a reason you reminded me of me, Trevor. And I see the resemblances more clearly standing here talking to you and looking into your eyes and hearing what you’ve had to say. It’s been an unexpected treat having this conversation and meeting you, and I look forward to seeing just how much more blood you shed and pain you inflict not only to keep that Television Championship but when you move on to more. Because you’re going to reach the same mountaintops I reached, you just can’t keep guys like us down. The sky’s the limit: Royal Rumble, UWF Championship, and finding rivals you hate so much you either put an axe in their gut, inflict the sort of punishment I did in Monster’s Ball, or stop their heart entirely!
Vinny is now looking far off in the distance, the wide-eyed and crazed look he’s known for on his face as he’s reliving his past sins and enjoying every second. After a moment, he snaps to.
Vinny Marseglia: Keep killing it, Mayor. And by killing it, I’m not just referring to succeeding but making sure that everyone that steps to you and your title as Mayor and spot as Television Champion never…leaves Harlan…alive.
Vinny pats the Television Championship as he walks past Trevor Lee, who couldn’t look more elated that the man he looks up to just used his catchphrase. As he can’t seem to wipe the smile from his face, Revolution continues elsewhere.
When Lie, Cheat, Steal by Jim Johnston plays, The UWF Universe See a low rider coming out from the back and drives it smoothly out here onto the stage and rides it straight down towards the ramp away and he pulls to a stop and turned on the switches inside of his low rider an stops it and gets out of his low rider in starts shaking his arms in gets inside of the Revolution ring and climbs up the top rope and beats on his chest and shakes his arms once again and head over towards the other top rope and does the exact same thing beats his chest and does the shake an gets down from the top rope
Tony Chimel: From El Paso, Texas Weighing in at two hundred and twenty eight pounds Eddie Guerrero
"Homicide" by LL Cool J hits the PA System and out comes the "Notorious 187" Homicide!
Homicide comes out and the fans cheer. Homicide puts the gun signs up and than he fake shoots his pretend guns and makes his way down to the ring as the fans cheer him.
Tony Chimel: Introducing from Cocunut Creek, Florida by way of Brooklyn New York this is the Notorious 187 Homicide!!!
Homicide is walking down the ramp when none other than Sami Zayn comes running up behind him.
Homicide doesn't even notice a thing until he's down from a Helluva Kick to the back of the head!
Mauro Ranallo: What the hell is this?
Corey Graves: Yes! Go get him Sami!
Homicide goes down and Zayn starts to beat him down with punches and kicks. He tries to cover up as best he can but Zayn is relentless. Referee's come down to try and stop him but La Luchadora and El Generico pop up to keep them at bay. Sami picks Homicide up and delivers a Blue Thunder Bomb on the floor! Zayn looks satisfied with himself but we still have no idea what prompted the attack. He picks up the Notorious 187 and tosses him into the ring. The trio make their way to the back with smiles on their faces. Th ref checks on Homicide and says he'll call the match off but Homicide says no. Dan Lambert comes out from the back and tells him to forfeit the match but Homicide ain't about that life. He slowly get to his feet with help of the ropes and tells the ref to ring the bell.
VS
DING DING DING!
Mauro Ranallo: Homicide is in no shape to be competing right now.
Corey Graves: Good, karma's a bitch.
Tom Phillips: That whole thing with you and The Cartel was like 8 years ago asshole.
Corey Graves: People never forget!
Homicide comes out of the corner with his dukes up but there's no love lost between he and Eddie and the luchador runs up and delivers a Dropkick that knocks him into the corner! Eddie brings him back up but Homicide shoves him away. Eddie comes right back at him but gets caught with the Gringo Cutter! Homicide however doesn't have it in him to go for the pin, instead grabbing at the back of his neck and crawling back over to the ropes.
Mauro Ranallo: Homicide has a lot of high impact manuevers in his repetoire but that's only going to make things worse for him.
Tom Phillips: Looks like he might have to put his ATT training to good use and try to finish this out in a slugfest or on the ground.
Homicide is measuring Eddie as he's getting to his feet. He runs right at him for the Running Flying Knee but Guerrero side steps him and takes his back. He throws him back with a German Suplex! Homicide lands high on the back of his neck and Eddie isn't stopping there. He brings him up and sends him back down to the mat with a Suplex. He keeps a hold of him and rolls back up to hit another. He does this yet again to complete the Three Amigos! With Homicide planted firmly in the middle of the ring, Eddie decides to go to the top rope. He gives a little shimmy before taking off with the Frog Splash! Dan Lambert can only look on as his beaten partner is pinned.
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2 . . .
3 . . .
Tony Chimel: Here is your winner, Eddie Guerrero!
Mauro Ranallo: Hard to image how different this match would be if Homicide was at 100%.
Corey Graves: Who cares, he got what he deserved.
Tom Phillips: I just want to know why Sami Zayn did what he did.
Corey Graves: Clearly he did it for the benefit of all of us.
Homicide is checked by his team while Eddie celebrates his return win as the show moves on.
The scene opens up in a local but nice looking restaurant. As the camera pans over, The Guild are seen sitting in a nearby booth with their respective menus in their hands in front of them.
The Miz: Let’s see: appetizer or no appetizer. Appetizer or no appetizer. Hmm.
Goldust: Am I really old enough to order off the senior menu?
Batista sets his menu down.
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: Guys, guys, relax. Tonight is about celebration so if you want an appetizer, get an appetizer. If you don’t want to order off a discounted section of the menu, then don’t. Money is no object.
The two men lower their menus and look at one another, a bit taken aback by the generosity.
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: You seem surprised.
The Miz: We just know that we haven’t been the most helpful lately and have, on more than one recent occasion, let you down and made you angry.
Batista chuckles briefly.
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: Consider it water under the bridge. You two did me proud at Slammiversary.
Before Batista can continue, the three men are rudely interrupted.
Distant Voice: You want to talk about pride?
As The Guild turn in the direction of the voice, there stands the man of many names: Kyle O’Reilly.
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: No, I don’t. I understand people like you always want to keep the topic in circulation like it’s the air that you breathe but here’s what I’m interested in: a nice dinner with my friends. So unless you’re the fucking waiter, I suggest you step your diabetic ass out of this restaurant before I get up from this table and kick it again!
This seems to fire up Kyle even more.
KOR: Again? You didn’t do it once and the footage proves it!
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: You want proof?
Batista sets the Hollywood Championship on the table with a thud.
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: Here’s your proof. I won, not you, pole smoker!
KOR: Effin’ jackass!
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: Prepubescent prick!
KOR: Crusty old windbag!
The two are now in one another’s face shouting as soon someone tries to intervene.
Restaurant Member: Guys…
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: Needle dicked panty waste!
Restaurant Member: Guys…
KOR: Corner cutting blowhard!
Restaurant Member: GUYS!
The two stop and turn their attention to him.
Restaurant Member: Now, this is an Applebee’s, sirs, so either take your yelling to the parking lot or sit back down in your booth and have your conversation at a respectful and considerate tone.
Batista gradually sits down as Kyle does as well on the opposite side of the table, practically forcing his way in as Miz and Goldust look none too happy about scooting over.
Restaurant Member: Can I start you off with some drinks?
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: Oh, he’s not…
Kyle has since snatched a menu from Miz as he’s looking over it and then looks at the waiter.
KOR: Do you guys have Gatorade?
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: What kind of fucking question is that? No they don’t have Gatorade!
KOR: How about Orange Slice?
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: It’s just called Slice, dumbass, and no one’s had that shit for over a decade! They have Coke products, okay? So order a fucking Coke product!
Restaurant Member: Sir, language.
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: It’s English, in case you can’t tell. Look just give me a minute to chase his little ass off and then you can come back.
Restaurant Member: Alright but if I have to call you down about your use of vulgarity or excessive volume, I will get my manager and he will throw you both out.
The waiter leaves the table.
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: Who the fuck hired his sensitive ass?
Kyle points at him as Batista lowers his voice.
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: Fine. Who the fuck hired his sensitive ass? He’s more bent out of shape than you are!
KOR: I’ll show you bent out of shape when I twist your friggin’ arm into a pretzel!
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: You would mention a pretzel as salty as you are!
KOR: Look if you want to make it to your Prime Time Medal match, I suggest…
The angry whispering is interrupted by the return of the waiter to the table as he clears his throat.
Restaurant Member: Are we ready to order?
Batista and Kyle both turn to him and answer at the same time.
NO!
They look at each other again now as they both stand up.
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: You really wanna get embarrassed again, kid?
KOR: I’ll tell you exactly what I want. I want a rematch for the Hollywood Championship, the Prime Time Medal, or whatever it is you’re holding at the end of tonight and I want it stipulated this time!
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: You want another go, I’ll be happy to give you round two because I know that, like Danhausen once upon a time, you aren’t going to shut up or quit showing up until I do. Now EC3 will pick the when and where but as for the stipulation, you let me pick that or no deal.
Kyle stares at him for a moment.
KOR: Fine, pick whatever stipulation you want because this time, you aren’t getting lucky.
Batista and Kyle brush past each other and walk offscreen.
Goldust: This wouldn’t have happened at Chili’s…
The scene opens with Cody Rhodes getting himself prepared for his match against Batista and he begin to speak.
Cody Rhodes: Well, it is another day at the office for your truly. Nothing has changed. Everything seem to stay the same ever since I have return. My match with Leyton haven't end the way I have planned. But regards of it, I have gave it my all and I have defeated him once again. I have proven my point about him and he has finally show his true colors. Now that is sand and done. Time for bigger fishes to fry and I am talking about the Prime Time Medal. I am going up against the leader of the Guild himself Batista. My it has been a long time we have faced each other in the ring ever since I have my return. He is still the same self absorbed guy hogging the spotlight and caring all about himself just because he is a Hollywood movie star. Well, Mr. Hollywood movie star, we will see what you got since you won't be having your pay goons to help you this time. We will see if you can handle your business on your own against the American Nightmare himself. You better believe it when I say I will bring my A game every time I am in the ring. I will risk my life and body to do whatever it takes to win the Prime Time Medal. So I can move on and get myself closer to fulfilled my dream goals of becoming a UWF Champion once again. Batista, I will make sure you pack your bags and get ready for the biggest fight of your life because I can promise you that you will be leaving tonight empty handed while I win the Prime Time Medal. I will send you back to Hollywood empty handed and make sure you go return there to make more crappy Hollywood movies to make a real living because your stay here in UWF is overdue. Tonight, your dreams will be nothing but a living nightmare when you get defeated by none other than the American Nightmare himself.......Cody Rhodes.
The scene fades and ends with Cody staring with a angry look.
Suddenly the lights start to darken and flicker...
Cheers begin to ring all around the arena as the music plays and Danhausen takes to the stage. After a couple of slow spins around the stage area, Danhausen then raises his arms and gives out a determined yell as the crowd pops in appreciation.
Tony Chimel
Making his way to the ring, from Someplace Far Away, weighing at least 300lbs, Danhausen!!
Danhausen heads down the ramp, waving politely at some of the fanhausens in attendance before he hops up onto the apron and signals the nearby cameraman to get a close up shot of him. Danhausen then points directly into the camera lens and yells “Love That Danhausen!” before climbing through the middle rope and posing in the center of the ring with his arms held high once again.
"Knight Vision" begins to play throughout the arena and the capacity begins to groan because they know what time it is. It is time to titillate their juices with the arrival of the "Thursday Night Thriller". This is the "Million Dollar Megastar". This is LA Knight. Knight does not take long bursting through the curtain and out onto the stage. The reception he receives isn't warm whatsoever but LA Knight does not care. He soaks in the atmosphere while the jeers rain down on him.
Tony Chimel: Ladies and Gentlemen, coming to the ring, from Baltimore, Maryland, weighing in at 230 pounds, he is the "Million Dollar Megastar", L...A....Knight!
As Chimel announces the brash star from Baltimore, Knight spells his name out in the air just to make sure that everyone knows exactly who he is.
Knight continues down the ramp towards the ring. The entire time he talks trash to all the people in the front row. He's not here for them; he's here for himself. As he reaches the end of the aisleway, he heads towards the hard camera before leaping onto the ring apron and posing for everyone to see him. There is no shortage in confidence in Knight tonight, as he enters the ring, climbs the nearest turnbuckle and throws up the "LA" hand sign.
Knight leaps off the top rope to the canvas and continues to prepare for the upcoming match he has.
VS
DING DING DING
LA Knight comes right out the gate and tackles Danhausen into the corner. From there he delviers Shoulder Thrusts over and over ujtil he lifts him up and seats him on the top turnbuckle. He goes to clibm up there with him but the Intercontinental Champion fights back and knocks him back down. He then situates himself at the top and comes off with a Crossbody. Knight however ends up catching him in mid air. He calls him a Dummy before giving him a Powerslam! He makes the pin!
1 . . .
2 . . .
Danhausen kicks out! Knight grabs him and pulls him closer towards the middle of the ring. He then exits out onto the apron and goes to the top rope. Not usually a high flier, Knight takes a bit longer than others would but it's not long before he comes flying off with an Elbow Drop! Or at least, that's what he had intended to do but Danhausen rolls out of the way. Knight's elbow gos right into the mat and he stands back up holding his elbow. Danhausen gets to his feet and scoops him up onto his shoulders. Knight goes to fight back with an Elbow to the side of the head but it seems to hurt himself more due to that missed Elbow Drop. Danhausen takes advantage by throwing him up into the Very Nice, Very Kneevil! He makes the pin!
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Knight kicks out!
Corey Graves: Danhausen's gonna have to do a lot more if he hopes to keep a Megastar like LA Knight down.
Tom Phillips: You know he says he's a megastar but from what? The only reason I know about him is because of what he says.
Corey Graves: Confidence and how you carry yourself is what matters. That's why no one respects you Phillips.
Danhausen walks over to the corner and grabs his jar of teeth. It's a little early in the match but that's what happens when the man is known for only 4 spots! He walks over with the jar to pour them down LA's gullet but the Million Dollar Megastar isn't about to let who know's who's teeth into his mouth. He puts his hand over the opening to stop the teeth from spilling out. He ends up overpowering Danhausen and yanks the jar away. He's seen things end poorly for other before and so he smashes it at ringside. Danhausen is furious that he'd let good teeth go to waste. He lifts his hands up to curse him but Knight kicks him in the gut before he can finish. He then hits the Spinning Neckbreaker! The ref drops down to make the count.
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2 . . .
Danhausen kicks out! Knight claps at the ref, telling him to count faster. He grabs the face painted freak and pulls him back up to a vertical base. He lifts him over his back, putting him in position for the Gravy train but the Intercontinental Champion slips behind him and rolls him back into a sunset flip pin!
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2 . . .
Knight gets the shoulder up just in time! He gets right back to his feet and goes at Danhausen but gets caught with a Drop Toe Hold that makes him smack his face on the mat. He rolls out of the ring to get a breather but that's just what Danhausen wanted. He goes out onto the apron and runs up to give him a kick to the chest. He runs back and forth while singing "Tequila" along with the crowd before giving that final Dadadadadadada! Danhausen! kick to the face! Knight looks like he doesn't know what hit him and son the Evil One tosses him back into the ring and follows him in to make the pin.
1 . . .
2 . . .
Another kickout from Knight!
Mauro Ranallo: Knight may think Danhausen is nothing more than a clown but he's learning tonight just why he's the reigning and defending Intercontinental Champion.
Corey Graves: Pure luck. Plus easy opponents like Homicide.
Danhausen brings Knight back up to a vertical base and hooks both arms. He's setting up for the Goodnighthausen but Knight spins out, keeping a hold of the arm to bringing him in for a Short Arm Clothesline! Knight keeps a hold of the arm and pulls the champ back up. He gives him a Knee Lift this time and then spins out for the Discus Clothesline but Danhausen falls back from the Knee Lift and Knight just hits nothing but air. He looks a bit embarrassed by this and simply climbs on top of Danhausen and starts swinging away. The ref has to count to 4 before Knight finally backs off or risk being disqualified.
Tom Phillips: Looks like Knight is losing his cool. Not a good look for him.
Corey Graves: What would you know about good looks. You dress like you shop exclusively at Men's Warehouse.
Tom Phillips: I think this suit's nice...
Knight backs away and walks around the ring, cooling off. He comes back to get Danhausen but the Intercontinental Champion catches him with an Inside Cradle!
1 . . .
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3 . . .
But NO! Knight gets out of it just in time! Danhausen crawls over to the corner and picks himself up with help from the ropes. Knight runs at him but eats a boot to the face! One boot isn't good enough though and Danhausen runs out with a second Big Boot to take him the Million Dollar Megastar down! The crowd is going crazy for Danhausen and he feeds off their energy. He goes towards Knight but LA grabs the ref and keeps him in between the two! The ref tries to get out of the way and runs off to the side but Knight gives Danhausen a Low Blow! With the champ hunched over, Knight scoops him up over his back and hits the Gravy Train! He goes for the pin!
1 . . .
2 . . .
3 . . .
Tony Chimel: Here is your winner, LA Knight!
Knight rolls out of the ring with a big smile on his face. He pulled a fast one on Danhausen and has now made a mark and a claim for some gold in UWF. Danhausen tries to tell the ref what happened but Knight is quick to leave before any sort of reversal can happen. Revolution rolls on!
The action of Revolution shifts inside of what appears to be a private waiting room, inside we see Edge’s two kids working on homework on the table while Beth is sitting on a nearby couch, both supervising and lost in her own thoughts at the same time. There’s a half-filled cup of coffee in her one hand that she’s idly swirling when the door opens and in steps Christian. He takes a seat next to Beth so the two can quietly converse without the children eavesdropping
Beth Phoenix
How’s he doing now?
Christian
He’s in good spirits, all things considered. The pain he’s used to at this point, comes with the territory.
Beth Phoenix
So…did you notice it too?
Christian
I did, I’m guessing you didn’t press the issue though?
Beth Phoenix
I didn’t want to pile on, when I was there he was still dealing with the pain mostly and the doctors, I didn’t want to be an anchor on his mind.
Christian
Yeah, I get that. I almost didn’t want to bring it up either, but he’s the one who asked me about it in the end.
Beth Phoenix
Oh?
Christian
Yeah. He was mostly just using me to spitball all the different possibilities out loud and take them down for him, since his head is still hurting. Wanted to explore all avenues and I gotta say, he seemed at peace with all of them.
At this point Beth finally stops idly swirling the cup of coffee and finally takes a sip. At this point, all the warmth is gone, but it gives her a brief moment to process and have a response.
Beth Phoenix
Well, he knows we’re all there to support him no matter his decision. Even if it is to hang them up finally. I’m sure the girls will be excited to finally get to watch some matches of his and have their hero back full-time. Did he tell you when it was going to happen?
Christian
Honestly…he didn’t tell me what he finally settled on as his next steps. All he told me was to reach out to EC3 and have a segment scheduled for next week. Says he wants all of the people most important to him there, in person too. So I think you’ll have to call the school and get the girls exempt for a few days.
Beth Phoenix
Wonderful, so they’ll have even more homework to complain about doing. Today it’s complaining about it in a hospital, tomorrow it’ll be complaining about doing it on a plane…
Christian
Look, at least they’re not complaining about doing it in a box. Or complaining about doing it with a fox. As long as we avoid the Dr. Seuss situations, we’ll be fine.
Beth gives a chuckle as she takes another sip of cold coffee.
Beth Phoenix
Definitely. Pop is in no position to be Hopped on at this time. By any definition of the word.
Now it’s Christian’s turn to chuckle.
Christian
Well, he should be good to go sooner rather than later. Probably just one more night of observation. Then next week, we’ll all see what the next chapter has in store. For all of us.
With that, Christian gets up and crouches next to the girls, asking them how their homework is going and whether they need help as Beth looks on. She raises the cup to her lips one last time, but the cup is finally empty. Nothing left. She looks at the bottom of the cup, wondering whether it’s time to refill the cup with something fresh…or to finally toss the cup and move on…
We open up on piece of paper that at the top has the UWF logo and beneath it reads "Talent Contract". The cameras pulls out a little bit to see a set of hands interlocked sitting on the page. The camera continues to pull out to show a familiar pattern on the sides of the screen. And as it pulls out even further you realize that is the pattern of the scarf of Maxwell Jacob Friedman, MJF. We now see the smug look on his face as he stares into the camera. Behind him stands another man we all know, William Regal. Regal is standing chest out and chin up with all the proper pomp that he is known for. MJF takes a minute for the picture to real sit and settle in.
Maxwell Jacob Friedman
Don't adjust your television sets ladies and gentleman. You are seeing what you hoped, the greatest free agent in the wrestling world is sitting in front of you with a pretty lucrative contract in front of him. In fact, I'm pretty sure if I sign this contract I may be making about double what your world champion is, but then again I don't need to be paid in fish food or chum.
MJF taps on the contract.
Maxwell Jacob Friedman
I've thought long and hard about whether I want to lower myself enough to come to a company like this. Whether you morons are worth my time to give you a glimpse of what real greatness looks like. And Mr. Regal reminded me that you toothless marks will be watching me on whatever show I bring my talents to, so you really are a non factor. No what made my decision so easy is that the powers that be backed up a damn truck full of money and basically through it in my lap.
MJF flips to the last page, picks up a pen and signs his name to it. He then slams the pen down on the top of the contract.
Maxwell Jacob Friedman
I'm not officially the highest paid man in UWF. I promise you it is money well spent because it's time UWF actually rises to, not my level because that's no possible, but a level where I don't feel embarrassed competing in a UWF ring. So you toothless inbreds should start getting excited, I get to make your lives just a little more meaningful by allowing you to bare witness to my greatness. Next week The Burberry Revolution starts. Be excited, be pissed, I don't give a damn because there's no stopping it. I'm better than you and you know it.
MJF gets up from the table and walks off. The camera moves in on Regal or then follows off screen.
As, “Sasquatch” by Ice Cube begins to play, the UWF fans immediately begin to boo as they know who the theme music belongs to and who they’re inevitably about to have to look at. Not missing a beat, out walks Batista with the Hollywood Championship proudly on him as he makes his way down the ramp to the ring.
Tony Chimel: From Washington, D.C. Weighing in at two hundred and ninety pounds. He is the reigning Hollywood Champion and the leader of The Guild, the, “Hollywood Animal”, BAATIIISSSSTTTTAAAA!!!
Batista goes to the nearest turnbuckle and ascends it, using the opportunity to show off the belt once more before stepping down and getting ready for the match ahead.
Tony Chimel: From Atlanta, Georgia, Making their way to the ring, the American Nightmare, Cody Rhodes!
The pryo goes off as the American Nightmare come out to a huge ovation from the roaring crowd and he has a huge smile on his face.
VS
DING DING DING
Cody walks right up to the center of the ring, not backing down from the Hollywood Animal in the slightest. Batista simply laughs at him and looks to his brother Goldust. Cody walks up to Batista and smacks him right in the face! A scowl comes across the Animal's face and he rushes at Cody. The American Nightmare backs away and lowers the ropes and Batista goes tumbling over but he hangs on. He gets back up only for Cody top springboard off the adjacent ropes and come flying in with a Disaster Kick to knock him off the apron!
Batista is bent over on the outside trying to shake the cobwebs from that kick to the face. Cody meanwhile climbs up to the top rope and gives one look back before leaping off with a Moonsault to take out Batista! Cody pumps his fist i the air and the crowd goes crazy for him. He picks up Batista and throws him back into the ring. It looks like Miz is trying to sneak up on him but Cody catches him and tells him to back off. He comes back into the ring but Batista tackles him and drives him into the corner where he does his patented Shoulder Thrusts in the corner. He brings him out of the corner right into a Pendulum Backbreaker! He makes the pin.
1 . . .
2 . . .
Rhodes kicks out! The "Feature Presentation" warns Cody to stay down before he gets put down. He brings him back up and lifts him up into the air for a Vertical Suplex. Cody however brings his knee down on top of his head to stun him and reverse into a Suplex of his own! Batista tries to get back up right away but the American Nightmare runs past him, springboarding off the middle rope to hit the Cody Cutter! He goes for the cover!
1 . . .
2 . . .
And Batista's hopes to become the Prime Time Medal holder stay alive! Cody stands back and waits as the Hollywood Animal gets to his feet. He comes up behind him, setting him up for the Cross Rhodes but Batista stops him and shoves him away. Cody jumps onto the middle rope for another Disaster Kick but this time gets cut in half in mid air with a Spear! Batista isn't done there though, he throws Rhodes over his shoulder and hits an Air Raid Crash!
Corey Graves: Look at Batista throwing out these new moves!
Mauro Ranallo: Who does he think he is, Chris Jericho?
Tom Phillips: Looks like Batista heard the fans or maybe even you Mauro.
Corey Graves: I'd watch my back if I were you.
Batista sits up and looks right at Mauro and smirks. He walks over to the ropes, still looking at the commentator and shakes the ropes, letting him know that what's about to happen might be because of him. He turns back to Cody who is trying to get back up. He shoves his head between his legs and lifts him up for the Batista Bomb. Cody starts fighting back with punches to the dome and manages to get free. Batista kicks him in the gut to stop any momentum though. He throws him to the ropes and bends down for the Back Body Drop but Cody stops and drops to his knees, hitting him with an Uppercut! He looks at his brother and gives him a thumbs up, Goldust going crazy on the outside. He turns back to Batista but gets hit with the Decapitator!
Tom Phillips: Whoa what move was that!?
Corey Graves: That was the Decapitator!
Tom Phillips: Yeah but like was it a clothesline, a powerslam?
Corey Graves: It's called the Decapitator Phillips!
Tom Phillips: I get that but did he come off the top ropes or something?
Corey Graves: Look out another Decapitator!
Another one indeed! Cody is down from that move and that's all that matters right now. Batista makes the pin!
1 . . .
2 . . .
Cody kicks out! Batista brings Cody up from behind and goes to add insult to injury. He grabs him from behind and gets him in position for the Cross Rhodes. While he's busy stroking his ego, Cody brings his knee up and stuns Big Dave with a knee right to the face! Batista stumbles back into the ropes. He runs at Cody but gets caught with a Snap Powerslam! Batista rolls to the ropes right away so Cody can't get the pin. Rhodes looks dejected but with the crowd behind him, he keeps his fighting spirit.
Tom Phillips: This crowd is fully behind the American Nightmare.
Corey Graves: And what good will that do him once he realizes that's still not enough to get him to claim the Prime Time Medal.
Mauro Ranallo: He's a legend in the UWF and Batista has also yet to win any meaningful gold here. I think it's an even playing field here tonight.
Cody walks over to Batista and grabs his leg, pulling him away from the ropes. He goes to lock in the Figure Four but Batista pushes him forward when he turns around. Cody hits the ropes and comes running back with a kick to the chest. Batista however catches his foot and shakes his head. He stands up while holding the leg of Cody but Rhodes catches him with an enzugiri! Batista is stunned once more and Cody runs at him but is caught with a Spinebuster! Ol' faithful. Batista then flips him over onto his stomach and locks him in the End Credits! It's only a matter of time until the lights go out and the ref calls for the bell.
Tony Chimel: Here is your winner, and NEW holder of the Prime Time Medal, Batista!
Batista grabs both the Prime Time Medal and his Hollywood Championship, showing them both off the crowd to massive boos. He doesn't give a shit about any of their feelings and is now one step closer to the Intercontinental Championship. He heads off to the back as the show moves on.
We open up inside of an office and than we hear a laugh that we may not have heard before in the UWF. We than see Jimmy Hart standing in front of us over the top of the desk. The person in the chair has his back to us.
Jimmy Hart: It's here baby!!! The contract you have been waiting for is here baby!!! You ready to make your presence felt in the UWF Hulkster?!
The chair turns around and we see Hulk Hogan staring at us and he is wearing his yellow Hulkamania t-shirt and he looks at Jimmy.
Hulk Hogan: Well let me tell you something Jimmy!!! I have been watching this company the UWF and let me just say I have been disgusted Jimmy!!! I mean can you believe that Shark Boy of all people is the World Champion of this company? I mean MY GOD!!! Jimmy mail this contract back because I'm ready BROTHER!!!!
Hogan pulls out a pen and he signs the contract and Jimmy puts it in his jacket pocket.
Jimmy Hart: Let's do this baby!!! UWF get ready for the Hulkster BABY!!!
Hogan stands up and he looks into the camera.
Hulk Hogan: UWF WHATCHA GONNA DO WHEN HULK HOGAN MAKES HIS RETURN BROTHER!!!! WHATCHA GONNA DO WHEN HULK HOGAN DESTROYS YOU!!!
We see Hulk Hogan flex his usual poses and the camera fades to black on Jimmy laughing.
Arena turns black; The crowd look towards the titantron; A light bulb swings back in fourth; Leyton Buzzard walks into frame in a suit his look that of apathy no lights on for the empathetic man from Bristol...
Leyton Buzzard
Losing is a part of growing, They say that "with every set-back strengthens ones character". I disagree with that statement, Growing is realizing the changes needed to set your self free, I was always the mercenary of war for THE PEOPLE. You see I always wanted to impress each and everyone of you "things". I was chosen by you people to be the one to dethrone Lee but I wanted to do it the "just" way, I wanted to be someone you "things" could look up to. I BURNED a church for you to just ignore me like it never happened, Do you know how sick that makes me now? No you wouldn't understand the sacrifices I made for you, Now would you?
I fought Cody and I did bad things for you! and now you turn on me all because of a low-blow I wanted to do much worse to that second generation piece of shit but held back my dark desires for YOU PEOPLE. The people who wanted the world from me than abandoned me when I couldn't do what they wanted. You left me to rot but now I see clearly as if the blindfold has been lifted and I could see for the first time what has to be done, I need to kill the puppet that was controlled by you things; I need to kill the alter ego of Leyton Buzzard. I killed the man that gave his heart and soul for you people it's no longer in his or your control. I will continue to kill every part of that man until nothing is left.
I have set myself free from the chains of your expectations and I will grow into the man I should've been all along. Thanks for nothing I will be at Revolution next week to pour gasoline onto everything you things hold dear...
Leyton smiles before laughing; The show moves on as Leyton continues his mental breakdown...
Chimel: The following contest is a non-title match and is set for one-fall!
Kingston's already waiting in the ring. Maybe next year he'll get an entrance. Who knows?
When the southern alt. rock hit "Ain't No Rest For The Wicked" starts playing throughout the arena, the fans' excitement is turned into scorn as out struts the man best known either as the mayor of Harlan, Kentucky or as the current UWF Television Champion, one mister Trevor Lee. Stepping in time with his theme song, Trevor Lee is given a showcase of the "respect" that the fans have for him, as a cacophony of jeers rain down upon the champ, with them quickly amplifying as Lee stands at the top of the entrance ramp, giving a double finger point to the gorilla position right as "The Butcher" Andy Williams comes to join him. Once his good ol' friend Andy comes to join him, Lee's smile grows even wider as the duo start their entrance together proper.
Chimel: And his opponent, being accompanied to the ring by "The Butcher" Andy Williams...weighing in at 220 lbs, he is the current UWF Television Champion and acting mayor of Harlan, Kentucky...'Mister' Trevor Lee!
As Lee makes his way down the ramp, he has that sinister, serpent's grin put on full display as he looks out around at the gathered crowd. With his re-election long since secured, the only thing left in the hands of mister Trevor Lee is that piece of Harlan Gold that has been firmly kept by his side since July of 2022, as the record-setting UWF Television Champion strides down to the ringside area, basking in the hatred from the audience.
Once at ringside, Lee opts to take the long road, striding to the hardcam side with that damned devilish grin on his face, Andy following closely behind to prevent any ambushes like a good bodyguard does. Hopping up knees-first onto the ring apron, mister Trevor Lee once again stops to look out to the crowd, using his newly-freed hand to clutch onto the ropes while keeping a firm grip on the WUF TV Title with the other, before then perking up to his feet. Finding his footing, Lee would point two fingers up to the sky, his eyes closed and a beaming smirk on his face, as he calls out how he's bringing both his in-ring and political game "TO THE MOON!"
With Trevor FINALLY in the ring, "The Butcher" Andy Williams would roll in afterwards, going right into his goose stepping taunt as he circles around his mayor, before standing right to the side of his boss/employer/friend(?), letting Lee take center stage once more the big man heads out so the match can get going.
Tony steps through the ropes and after ensuring both competitors are ready to start, the Official calls for the bell.
VS
DING DING
When the bell sounds off, Eddie Kingston stomps across the ring with murderous intent, arms stretched out ahead and teeth bared like a black bear coming at a full trash can. Bears love garbage. If you live in bear country, don't leave your trash out over night. Harlan, Kentucky is bear country, so Trevor Lee knows for dang sure that there's no out-running one that's coming at you. The best he can hope for is to retreat to safety, which he does by fleeing backwards and tucking himself between the middle and top ropes and crying for sanctuary.
Kingston comes in to pry him out, but the Referee isn't gonna allow that, fella. He instructs the Mad King to put 'er in reverse and give the TV Champ so space. Eddie doesn't look impressed by the cowardly tactics and he certainly isn't enthusiastic about offering up a clean break. Yeah, he steps off, but it's super begrudingly.
Down at ringside, the Butcher is glaring up the New Yorker like he'd like to slice himself off a slab of bear meat. Eddie catches him staring at warns him to watch himself while Trevor untangles himself from the ropes.
Ranallo: At Slammiversary, Tommaso Ciampa beat Eddie Kingston to the punch, pinning Sami Zayn in a triple threat match to establish himself as the Number One Contender for Shark Boy's UWF Championship. Nobody has come so close to winning gold and walking away empty-handed than the Mad King. A win over the Television Champion here tonight would have to put him right to the front of the contedership queue again.
Graves: A year ago, I was almost on board with the hype train. It seemed like Eddie might actually be the guy to knock Punk off the top. But since then? Nothing. He's a B player at best and has been his whole career, and frankly, I think he's about to get out-classed by the man who's about to become the longest-reigning TV Champ in UWF history.
Lee circles around, looking for an opportune moment to strike. Eddie doesn't give him any time, though. He closes in and before the Mayor can make it to the ropes again, Kingston grabs a hold of him and drags the action towards the center of the squared circle. The Champ looks for a side headlock. Kingston shuts that down then slaps on a bear hug.
After a tight squeeze, he launches his opponent overhead with a humongous belly-to-belly suplex! Trevor splats against the canvas and Kingston crawls over to make the cover...
1...
2...
Lee kicks out just after the second count. An impatient Mad King kneels next to him and scowls at the Ref, like he isn't impressed with his counting speed. The third man pretends he doesn't notice. Eddie shakes his head and stands. When he bends down to pick up his foe, however, Trevor Lee catches him around the neck with one arm and the leg with the other before curling him up with a Small Package!
Phillips: Here's Lee with the roll-up!
Graves: He's got it in tight, too!
The Referee drops and starts counting...
1...
2...
Kingston pops out at two! He scrambles up to his feet but the feisty Kentuckian snags him around the leg again and drops him to the canvas with a snappy School Boy pin! Eddie's caught off guard! The Official is still right there to call it...
1...
2...
Once again, Eddie pops out before the third count. This time, the momentum of his escape has him rolling towards the ropes. Apparently he decides to just keep going as he escapes the ring and lands on his feet just beside the apron.
Trevor gets to his feet, notices Eddie taking a powder and decides to rub it in with a bit of peacocking. That just irks the spit out of the Mad King, who pounds the edge of the ring in frustration.
Ranallo: Kingston holds a victory over The Mayor of Harlan, but Lee looks to be getting the better of him now in this rematch.
Graves: This is a clever game plan by Trevor Lee. Eddie Kingston is as tough as they come, but he's temperamental to a fault. Getting under his skin is going to throw him off, and with his focus out the window, it will be easy for the Champ to capitalize.
Andy Williams circles around the ring to the side where Eddie is standing. Kingston balls up a fist and looks like he's about to go vent on the guy. The Butcher looks like he'd welcome a scrap, but both Trevor and the Referee intervene. Lee tells his man to chillax, no wanting to risk the chance to avenge the L on his record with a DQ. The Official warns Kingston to get back in the ring or he'll start up a ten count. Eddie bites down his lip, shoots one last nasty look towards the heater, then slides back under the ropes.
Trevor Lee is all over him like white on rice. Or brown on brown rice. Or black on burned rice. He swarms the Mad King and puts the boots to him, stomping a mudhole and then some. The Ref is double upset by Lee's holding the top rope for added leverage and his refusal to let up once Eddie grips the bottom cable for the break. It takes the better part of a five count for the Mayor to finally let up, by which point its hard to even hear the Ref calling numbers against the boos of the capacity crowd.
Graves: Hmm. We must be in a blue state tonight.
Phillips: I think hatred for Trevor Lee is becoming a bi-partisan matter, Corey.
Lee backs off, really feeling himself. Kingston stumbles to his feet, eyes glossed over with blind rage. He throws his unbalanced fury towards his opponent with reckless abandon. The TV Champ has no trouble countering, pulling him to the ground with an easy armdrag then transitioning over to a grounded headlock.
Kingston is too flustered and unfocused to escape easily, and Trevor's incessant condescension and mocking isn't helping. He's taunting the Mad King as he keeps him flattened out with the basic hold, talking himself up while talking the other man down. This, of course, just stirs up the fans more. Lee doesn't care. He's all smiles and sunshine as he styles on Eddie.
Graves: What did I tell you? Eddie's mental game is way off. Lee is just toying with him now.
Ranallo: He might be playing with fire here...
Trevor instructs the Referee to ask Eddie whether he wants to quit. The Ref asks. Straw meets camel's back and shatters it. That's a bridge too far. Eddie explodes up with the force of a thousand tantrums, bringing the weight of Lee with him then driving him back down with a Saito Suplex!
The fans pop big as Trevor bounces off the mat like a basketball. He tries to get back to his feet quick but Kingston straight up tackles him through the ropes to the floor below. They smash into the ground and land in a horrible little heap right in front of the commentary table.
Phillips: This is getting too close for comfort!
Ranallo: Eddie Kingston ran through Trevor Lee like a train hitting a cow on the tracks!
Graves: Have you ever even seen that happen?
Ranallo: Once!
The Butcher comes back around that side of that ring. Is he there to help out Trevor? Is he there to attack Kingston? Nobody knows, and nobody knows less than the Referee, who ain't about to risk to sanctity of this competition with some shenanigans. He actually slides out of the ring and gets between Williams and the action, putting hands on that tatted up chest while warding off any potential interference.
It's a gutsy move going after a rhythm guitarist like that. They have nothing to lose. Fortunately for the third man, Butch doesn't take a swing at him, but the lumbering behemoth keeps him distracted long enough for Lee to groggily get to his feet and stumble off towards the Timekeeper's area. And what's there? Why it's his UWF Television Championship belt.
Big boos from the people as he snatches up the leather and gold with a serpentine tilt in his brow, like for sure he's up to no good. Poor Eddie kinda gooned himself on that tackle out of the ring. He's just getting up now, and he's shaking some serious cobwebs. The fans try and let him know what's up, but to his ringing ears, their cacophonous pleas are white noise. Like white on rice. But noise.
Phillips: Turn around Ref!
Ranallo: I don't like that look in Trevor Lee's eyes. He's got all the signs of a Grinch who's about to steal Christmas.
You know where this going. The Mayor goes headhunting. He's gonna take Eddie to the dance with a belt shot to the mush. The Referee? He doesn't have a clue what's up. His hands are full with all two-hundred-and-seventy-three pounds of Andy Williams.
Lee charges at Eddie but OH SNAP, Kingston posts up and boots him right in the junk on the way in. The crowd is shock-and-awe'd, equal parts stoked to see Lee get some just deserts and surprised to see the Mad King take the low road like that.
Trevor doubles over and he's so caught up in how much big nards hurt that Eddie has no troubles snagging that belt away and hitting him across the head with it instead!
Ranallo: I suppose turnabout is fair play...
Graves: He's a dirty cheat! Eddie Kingston is a lawless mongrel! A delinquent! A no good, dirty rotten, son of a -
Williams sees that the plan has gone haywire and now all of a sudden he's trying to get the Ref to turn around to. He points over his shoulder and the Official pivots just in time to see Kingston rolling the dummied Mayor under the ropes. Following the both of them into the ring, he makes the count when Eddie hooks a leg...
1...
2...
3...
DING DING
YOUR WINNER...
EDDIE KINGSTON!
Kingston sits up, not looking especially satisfied with the victory. While he's still getting some love from the crowd, it's quieter than when he came out, like some folks aren't so sure about how that all just went down. His line of sight drifts from the KO'd Lee to the title belt lying on the floor outside the ring.
Graves: I hope Eddie Kingston gets suspended for that. Hell, I wouldn't mind seeing EC3 fire him tonight.
Ranallo: As you said earlier, Corey, Kingston is a man who has been on the cusp of taking home some gold for so long. Well, he might have finally snapped. To me, this looks like someone who's willing to do whatever it takes to another crack at a title, and that doesn't bode well for his opponents.
Phillips: Trevor Lee is a despicable person, and, as we just saw, a bully in the ring. He might have provoked Eddie to cross the line, but I have to say, it's a shame to see Eddie take a win like that.
Eddie gets up and storms up the ramp without celebrating. The Butcher comes in to check on Lee while Revolution rolls on!
We head to the backstage area where a camera crew runs up to Sami Zayn
Sami Zayn: Oh let me guess, you want to know why I did what I did. Do you people lack critical thinking skills? It's obvious why I did what I did but no, you people need it spoon fed to you. Nobody is ever able to see past the surface level. I don't owe an explanation to any of you, you simply need to find out for yourselves. If Homicide however is confused and wants to know why I did what I did, then he can come find me. Let me just say this though to the rest of the UWF roster. Homicide isn't going to be the last person I tend to make an example out of.
Zayn walks off and the show moves on.
Tony Chimel: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first…
A lion synthethetic violion whispers through the air like a pretodactyl screech. Soon, a breakbeat ripples beneath. Strobe lights illuminate the entrance way. When the riff kicks in, it heralds the arrival of the Diabetic Dragon. Kyle O'Reilly storms out on to the ramp, fists and jaw clenched, looking like the quiet kid on a bad day while his step-sister Bayley follows close behind. He does some shadow boxing at the head of the ramp while Tony announces his stats.
Chimel: Being accompanied to the ring by Bayley, from Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada... weighing in at 200 pounds... Kyle O'Reilly!
Our beloved Canuck's pace is in lock-step with the groove en route to the squared circle. The fans in the arena born on the good side of 9/11 know the words and can't help but sing along when the chorus drops. Feeding off that energy, Kyle is spiritually compelled to shred some air guitar as he steps through the ropes to compete. He rocks the heck out with the UWF Universe before getting ready to friggin fight. Bayley, meanwhile, lurks and lingers on the fringe of the squared circle, ready to fight dirty if it comes to that.
Tony Chimel: And the opponent…
GIVE ME A SHELL YEAH!
The raw guitar driven sound of Accept's 'Fast as a Shark' hits the PA system and the crowd begin to go wild. Shark Boy marches out onto the stage full of piss and vinegar, he's mouthing off at anyone and everyone. Shark Boy wastes no time storming down to ringside his eyes fixed on the task in hand his head bobbing side to side as he jaw jacks on his way to ringside as waves of fans reach out to their favourite masked man.
Tony Chimmel: Introducing, from the Deep Blue Sea, weighing in at 205 pounds... SHARK BOY!
Shark Boy stomps up the steps and through the ropes into the ring, he makes a b-line for the corner where he heads to the top rope and throws out the fin-salute to the crowd before throwing his two fists high into the air for all the Shark-o-holics out there. Shark Boy repeats this at the three other corners before taking off his vest and waiting for the bell to sound.
DING DING!
VS
As the ring bell sounds, Shark Boy goes for a kick to the stomach but Kyle grabs the leg and spins him around so that his back is turned to Kyle. With his opponent’s back to him, Kyle goes for a Bulldog but as O’Reilly leaps, SB sidesteps and Kyle hits nothing but mat. As the young Canuck pops up, Sharky spins him around and goes for another kick to the stomach but Kyle again grabs the leg, this time throwing it downward, forcing Shark Boy to plant his foot as Kyle takes him down with a Short Arm Clothesline. With the champ down, Kyle brings his leg south towards him like he’s trying to squash a pesky insect but the champ rolls out of the way. Thinking quickly, Kyle goes for a stomp with the other foot, but the finned fighter rolls out of the way of that too. O’Reilly brings his hands together above his head now and goes for a Falling Double Axe Handle but, for the third time, the masked mudhole stomper rolls out of the way before kipping up and falling backward while throwing his arm back, catching O’Reilly at the base of the skull with the point of his elbow. Kyle is face down now as Shark Boy starts stomping on his upper back a few times before rolling him over onto his back to attack that side. As the Great Black and Blue Shark goes to resume the stomping, however, this time it’s the, “Diabetic Dragon” that kips up as he pivots around and catches Shark Boy with the stiffest kick anyone in attendance has seen or heard in eleven years of watching UWF.
True to his reputation of being the toughest son of a fish around though, SB stays on his feet but staggers forward towards the ropes, grabbing the top one with both hands and visibly leaning and dazed by the kick. Kyle sweeps the legs and causes Shark Boy to hit the back of his head hard on the mat, then delivers an Elbow Drop to the chest as Sharky sits up holding his chest. O’Reilly leads him to his feet now and guides him through the ropes so that they’re both standing on the apron, then performs a Side Russian Leg Sweep forward as both men hit the outside floor. Kyle stands up and dusts himself off before creating some distance and then running towards his downed opponent, connecting with a Baseball Slide that causes Sharky to roll a few times. O’Reilly is up to his feet again as he reaches down and grabs Shark Boy and guides him forcefully back to a vertical base, getting a Headbutt for his troubles as he does. With the star of Pumped dazed, Sharky runs and leaps onto the ringside barricade behind Kyle, then leaps over him while reaching back with his arms and connects with a Dead Sea Drop!
Tom Phillips: Quick thinking as well as footwork by the champion there.
Mauro Ranallo: With everything he borrows from Stone Cold, it’s easy to forget that Shark Boy is a cruiserweight.
Corey Graves: Impressive movement for sure but it matters more what he’s going to do to keep the momentum in his favor.
With O’Reilly down, Shark Boy goes for a stomp to the lower back but Kyle rolls out of the way onto his back and kips way up, landing on the ringside barricade for a split second before launching himself backward and bringing Shark Boy down with a Cutter of his own. As Sharky pops up, he hits the edge of the ring apron and is sprawled out in a way as Kyle lights into his chest with a hard Knife Edge Chop that visibly takes the breath from the UWF Champion. Kyle backs up to the ringside barricade now and then runs towards his opponent but Shark Boy runs forward himself and uses O’Reilly’s momentum against him to perform a Flapjack, dropping Kyle face first onto the edge of the ring. Kyle is on his knees as he slams his fists against the ground and then stands up, Sharky slugging him with a hard right. Kyle staggers a bit as another punch connects. Shark Boy goes for a third but as he does, Kyle leaps back as the punch connects with the ring post. As the UWF Champion tries to shake off the pain, Kyle grabs his arm and feeds it through the ropes, utilizing the ring post as he slaps on the Vanilla Bar submission hold!
Tom Phillips: Oh my! Kyle O’Reilly is going to detach Shark Boy’s arm!
Mauro Ranallo: Mamma Mia! Someone’s got to stop this!
Corey Graves: Tap or snap is the name of the game, boys!
The referee begins counting as Kyle wrenches on the hold as hard as he can.
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
FOUR!
FI..
Right before getting counted out, Kyle releases the hold as Shark Boy slinks down and grabs his arm in pain. O’Reilly walks around and grabs him, pulling him to his feet and rolling him into the ring before sliding in after. As Kyle gets to his feet, Sharky sits up, still nursing his injured arm as O’Reilly makes it a target, throwing a Bryan Danielson-esque kick at it but Shark Boy rolls out of the way and then runs at Kyle and, with one good arm, connects with the Lou Thesz Press as he starts hammering away on the, “Diabetic Dragon”. As this goes on, Bayley climbs up onto the apron and starts shouting at Shark Boy until Grado pulls her down and gets in her face, the two getting into a heated argument as Shark Boy breaks away from the mounted punches and heads over to the ropes, calling out to them to break it up. As this is going on, O’Reilly is to his feet and, as a tribute to Jason David Frank, starts miming playing the flute as the camera pans in and out wildly. The fans are going wild and as Sharky shifts his focus to see what the commotion is about, he gets hit with the Blue Eyes Diabetic Dragon! Kyle scrambles into the cover.
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
DING DING DING!
Tony Chimel: Here is your winner, Kyle O’Reilly!
Bayley enters the ring and hugs her brother Kyle as he looks reluctant to return the affection. O’Reilly grabs the ropes and starts shaking them, then lets go and does a machine gun like gesture with his body.
Corey Graves: Well there’s no question who he’s mimicking there. The question is though does he really want another go at Batista?
Tom Phillips: I’d say this solidifies it and earlier the, “Hollywood Animal” did accept.
Mauro Ranallo: But will EC3 make it official? Time will tell.
Tom Phillips:I don't know, a win over the UWF Champion may have just catapulted Kyle O'Reilly's stock.
Corey Graves:There's no stock bigger than sharing the ring with the Hollywood Animal.
Bayley is still taunting Grado as he helps the UWF Champion and apologizes for the scuffle that distracted him. Kyle is still calling out Batista as the show comes to a close.
END OF SHOW
Credits
Shark Boy vs Kyle O'Reilly - Dresden
Kingston vs Lee - Fauche
Danhausen vs Knight, Guerrero vs Homicide, Batista vs Rhodes - Danny