Post by Danny on Jan 5, 2023 17:28:39 GMT -6
We head to the arena where the pyrotechnics go off from the stage and the camera pans around to get a shot of the Revolution fans in attendance before panning to the commentary table where Corey Graves, Mauro Ranallo, and Tom Phillips are standing by.
Mauro Ranallo: Hello everyone and welcome to Revolution! I'm Mauro Ranallo alongside my partners Tom Phillips and former International Champion Corey Graves.
Tom Phillips: Rivalries will be tested tonight in our main event when Batista and Kyle O'Reilly are forced to team up to face Tommaso Ciampa and Shark Boy.
Corey Graves: It's the EC3 special but you know what I think is special? This new MJF kid.
Mauro Ranallo: He is very talented, it's just a shame the tactics he resorts to. He'll face Leyton Buzzard later tonight.
Tom Phillips: Plus LA Knight has been turning heads as of late but he'll face his biggest test to date when he takes on the former UWF Champion Edge.
Corey Graves: Edge is started to become soft and Knight will make him pay for that, trust me.
Mauro Ranallo: But first, it's Hulk Hogan taking on Eddie Guerrero and that match starts right now!
DING DING!
Tony Chimel: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first…
Hulk Hogan's theme hits and he makes his way out to the ring with Jimmy Hart wearing his Hulkamania Rules t-shirt, yellow trunks, yellow boots, bandana on his head.
Chimel: Introducing first, from Venice Beach, California weighing 303 pounds accompanied by Jimmy Hart. He is The Real American Hulk Hogan.
When Lie, Cheat, Steal by Jim Johnston plays, The UWF Universe See a low rider coming out from the back and drives it smoothly out here onto the stage and rides it straight down towards the ramp away and he pulls to a stop and turned on the switches inside of his low rider an stops it and gets out of his low rider in starts shaking his arms in gets inside of the Revolution ring and climbs up the top rope and beats on his chest and shakes his arms once again and head over towards the other top rope and does the exact same thing beats his chest and does the shake an gets down from the top rope
Tony Chimel: From El Paso, Texas Weighing in at two hundred and twenty eight pounds Eddie Guerrero!
VS 
DING DING!
As the ring bell sounds, Eddie connects with a hard right to the face of the Hulkster then continues to pepper him with punches as he gets backed into the nearest corner. Once he has Hulk backed into the corner, Eddie delivers a knee to the abdomen before climbing up the ropes and beginning to tee off on the forehead of his opponent. As the crowd counts along with each one that connects, they get to ten as Eddie goes for an eleventh but Hogan grabs him and reverses the situation into a Powerbomb. Hulk runs into the ropes now and goes for the Leg Drop but Guerrero moves out of the way as the Red and Yellow Hero hits nothing but mat. Hogan raises up holding his back as Eddie kicks him in the stomach and hooks his arm around his head, launching into and connecting with a Vertical Suplex. After impact is made, Guerrero swings his legs around and gets up to his feet as he connects with a second. After impact, he swings his legs around again and gets back to his feet as he completes the Three Amigos. After this, Eddie heads over to the far turnbuckle and climbs up to the top. He stands up and does his “Latino Heat” shimmy before leaping off and going for the Frog Splash but Hogan rolls out of the way and Eddie eats nothing but mat. As Eddie pops up, Hulk grabs him and applies an Abdominal Stretch, delivering punches with his right hand while the hold is applied.
After a few punches connect, Hogan releases the hold and spins Eddie around to face him as he connects with a Headbutt to Eddie and then applies a Bearhug. Hulk swings Eddie back and forth in the hold for a moment then falls back, turning the situation into a Flapjack into the turnbuckle. As Guerrero hits face first, he goes staggering backward as Hogan delivers the Big Boot to the back of his head, Eddie going spilling through the ropes to the outside as a result. Hulk exits the ring to follow Eddie but as he climbs down from the apron, Guerrero hits him with a low blow out of sight of the referee and then stands up and drops Hogan with a Clothesline. Eddie slides into the ring as the referee begins the count.
ONE!
TWO!
Tom Phillips: This doesn’t look good for the, “Real American”.
THREE!
FOUR!
Hogan rolls over onto his stomach now.
FIVE!
Hulk starts pushing up with his hands.
SIX!
SEVEN!
Hogan is back to a vertical base and slides back into the ring as the referee breaks the count. Guerrero starts stomping on the upper back of the Hulkster now but Hulk is getting up in spite of this as he starts Hulking up. Once he gets to his feet, he points at Eddie as the crowd goes, “You!”. Guerrero runs at Hogan but gets a Big Boot for his troubles as Hulk hits the upstage ropes and connects with the Leg Drop before going for the cover.
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
DING DING DING!
Tony Chimel: Here is your winner, Hulk Hogan!
As Hogan celebrates his win, Revolution continues elsewhere.
The action moves backstage where we can see Edge wrapping up a photoshoot with official UWF photographers.
Edge
I feel about ten pounds lighter this time around, can any of you figure out why?
Edge gestures to his waist with a belt motion, making light of his situation as a former UWF Champion, which gets a smile out of him but nervous chuckles from everyone around. The workers still seem to walk on eggshells around Edge as he has yet to prove he can walk the talk of being 'reformed'. As Edge goes to walk away, he's stopped by Kayla Braxton, with a microphone and the intent to interview in her eyes. Edge begrudgingly stops his motion to leave and stays for the interview.
Kayla Braxton
Edge, I'm so sorry to catch you in between appointments, but do you mind if I can ask you a few questions?
Edge
I think I can spare a few moments. It's the least I can do for how you were treated by that sleazeball, LA Knight.
Kayla shifts a little awkwardly at the mention of that interaction before composing herself and starting the interview in earnest.
Kayla Braxton
Well, this is the part where I'd ask you about your upcoming opponent, but I think we both know how you feel about him heading into your upcoming match tonight. So I want to get your perspective on the bigger picture. At Slammiversary you were unsuccessful in your quest to regain the UWF Championship, yet the Royal Rumble is right around the corner. Do you feel like you're benefiting from some fortuitous timing?
Edge
Absolutely I am. I can't deny that one bit, I could not have picked a better time to have failed. I know where my place is now, back of the line for the UWF Championship. Any other time of year, I'd refocus, take a look at some of the other mountains to climb in the UWF. The Television title, maybe even try to win and hold onto that Prime Time Medal and of course, the Intercontinental Championship. But with the Rumble looming...let's just say it's an interesting time for the UWF and for me.
Kayla Braxton
It truly is. And speaking of an interesting time for you, the UWF Universe's eyes will be on you with a lot more scrutiny tonight than any other night in your career. You've made a point to declare yourself on the "right path" now. Do you imagine that to be a tough adjustment for you? Especially against such an...unsavory opponent?
Kayla shudders a bit when bringing up LA Knight, even in vague terms.
Edge
Look, old habits die hard. I know this, I understand this and it'll be a process. I feel like tonight I may be allowed a little wiggle room from the crowd, but even still, I want that wiggle room to be cleaned up. No one likes a loose suit, it's gotta fit your form. That's the goal, I want rule-abiding Edge to be seen as a nice suit, well fitting, accentuating all the right parts of m.....y skillset. The real test will be the first time I have to square off against someone the crowd loves. Can I keep that shortcut seeking Edge buried deep if the crowd isn't on my side? It was never a question of ignorance to my actions, I knew what I was doing. So, it's all about continuously choosing the right actions in every moment. Though hey, if my hand slips cinching in a headlock to ol LA tonight and a thumb gets in his eye...maybe I'm a little sloppy since I was taking shortcuts for so long.
Edge provides a little wink and a shoulder tap to Kayla, giving her a little chance at some comeuppance.
Kayla Braxton
Guess we have to trust the process. And about last week when Ley...
Kayla is cut off as Edge's phone starts ringing. He pulls it from his pocket and sees that it's from Beth.
Edge
I'm sorry Kayla, it's about that time I FaceTime my girls when I'm on the road. I'll put in a request with EC3 for a full fledged interview next week with you to make up for it, yeah? Get your best questions ready for it, sound good?
Kayla nods as Edge peels off, answering the phone while powerwalking towards his locker room. The camera lingers on Kayla as it starts to fade away, the sound of Edge asking his daughters how school went fading away with the scene as Revolution rolls on.
Revolution has been off the chain so far, producing quality as always. We decide to take a break from the ring where we see Renee Young standing by with a microphone in hand.
Renee Young: Sorry to take you away from the ring but I have a special guest at this time. Please welcome everyone's favourite Little Runt from Dudleyville, Spike Dudley.
Spike walks into shot, all smiles as he looks in the zone. He smiles at Renee, giving her a nod before Renee continues.
Renee: Welcome back Spike. It's wonderful to see you back in UWF. Now last week you mentioned it being a social call but by the time you left, you had interrupted L.A Knight and I'm not so sure that's the case this week as you have requested to see Mr Knight's match up close. What are your intentions tonight?
Spike Dudley: Firstly, it's great to be back and secondly, it's wonderful to see you still around working your magic in the backstage here. Somethings never change hey!! As for my intentions tonight, it's quite simple. L.A ran his mouth last week. He made some bold claims, I just want to see if...........
Spike is suddenly stopped mid sentence on his short interview by.....
?: Hey Runt!!!
The man that interrupts Spike is none other than UWF's resident loudmouth, LA Knight.
LA Knight: Let me talk to 'ya. See, last week, 'ya did a lot of talkin'. And it's usually not in my nature to allow people to talk to the "Million Dollar Megastar" any old type of way. But it's a New Year; I'm in a good mood, so I'm going to give 'ya a pass for the way you spoke to me. But let me make one thing perfectly clear, the next time 'ya even think to speak in L...A....Knight's direction, I won't be so nice. As a matter of fact, I must just slap the lips right of 'ya face. 'Ya understand me?
Spike goes to answer but Knight cuts him off...
LA Knight: Quiet! The adult is talking. Now, I'm glad I can remind 'ya of an era gone by. But truth be told little Runt, the days where you were top dog have long since been gone. So I'm gonna tell 'ya the same thing I told Edge; stop living in the past.
LA Knight: 'Ya say 'ya got an itch. Feel free to scratch it. Cause let me tell 'ya exactly how it's going to go, Runt. "Ya decide to come out of the retirement home and step back in my ring, I'll gladly be waiting for 'ya. So, I can prove to you exactly what I say is true. L...A....Knight is money; L...A...Knight is UWF's top star and L...A...Knight is going to be UWF Champion before you can say "Dudley Dog".
Once again, Spike tries to get a word in edgewise.
LA Knight: Shut up, dummy! Let me give 'ya a piece of advice. 'Ya here to keep an eye on me. 'Ya gonna watch my match. Do yourself a favor and JUST watch. 'Ya do anything more and I promise it doesn't end well for 'ya. Champion or not; legend or not; a runt is still a runt when he's eye to eye with the top dog. And since 'ya rudely interrupted me last wee, let me remind 'ya, that's not an insult, THAT's just a fact of life! YEAH!
Knight stares Spike in the eyes momentarily before walking off. Leaving both Spike and Renee standing there speechless. The scene then fades.
The feed cuts to a hospital where Kayla Braxton and a camera man are walking towards Sami Zayn's room.
Kayla Braxton: I think this is the room.
Kayla and the camera peek into the window and Sami can be seen walking back and forth arguing on the phone. You can't really make out what he's saying but it's something about a plan. The phrase "take out the competiton" and "rig the Royal Rumble" can be heard. The camera man knocks on the door and Sami quick runs back into the hospital bed and and softly tells them to come in.
Kayla Braxton: Hey Sami.
Sami Zayn: Oh hey! I didn't think this was going to be televised but I get it, I'm by far the biggest draw in the company so I should have expected it. As you can see, the secret's out. I'm not medically cleared to compete. My doctor says I have vertigo plus I pulled my groin when that coward Homicide ran into my foot. They have ensured me that I will be good to go in time for the Royal Rumble. I couldn't just sit this one out and let some unworthy person win it after all. As far as wrestling regularly for you guys, it just won't be possible for now. It sucks I know. You got all these new people coming in thinking they own the place after a few wins here and there. There's no Sami Zayn to kick them into place and now they're getting big heads. Trust me though, the Forever Champion will make quick work of them come the Rumble.
Kayla Braxton: Ok but I couldn't help but overhear some of your conversation on the phone earlier and-
Sami Zayn: What conversation? I wasn't on the phone. You must have heard the TV.
Kayla Braxton: The TV is off.
Sami Zayn: Yeah but I had it on.
Kayla Braxton: I didn't see you turn it off.
Sami Zayn: It's one of those voice activated TVs.
Kayla Braxton: I didn't hear you say TV off.
Sami Zayn: Well we're in a hospital, maybe you should get your ears checked.
Both Kayla and Sami squint and stare at each other.
Kayla Braxton: Okay well I'm gonna go.
Sami Zayn: Bye! Have a great day!
Zayn's smile fades immediately and Kayla rolls her eyes as she walks out of the room and the feed cuts back to the ring.
"On his way to the ring, From Bristol, United Kingdom...."
Buzzard comes out from gorilla hands in the air as he mimics a spy glass, He searches the whole crowd before throwing his arms and moving forwards towards the ring...
"Leyton Buzzard."
Buzzard has his arms out high in the air taking in the atmosphere of the arena, Buzzard rolls his way into the ring where he rolls under, He places his body between top and middle rope as he taunts to the crowd, Buzzard takes a moment before going back to his corner...
He throws himself into the ropes as the crowd keep chanting "Who are you" at the UWF Stud...
"Better Than You" begins to play and there is a tidal wave of boos from the fans. After a few moments MJF begins to swagger out of the entrance way. Following behind him is Sir William Regal. MJF laughs at the fans who are trying to get under his skin as he walks towards the ring.
Tony Chimel: Making his way to the ring accompanied by Sir William Regal. Weighing in at 216 pounds from Plainview New York. He says he is better than you and you know it Maxwell Jacob Friedman, M...J...F!!!!
The fans erupt even louder and MJF doesn't pay them any mind. He walks into the ring and Regal opens the ropes for him. He stands in the middle of the ring flexing a bit and smirking as his music fades.
VS 
DING DING DING
Once the bell rings, the crowd just straight up shits on the match. A "Both guys suck" chant breaks out and if there was any semblance of a cheer, not a single soul would be able to hear it over the sheer amount of hate both guys are getting. MJF doesn't really let it get to him, he just smirks like the jerkoff he is. Leyton on the other hand is visibly ticked. He's practically wincing from the noise and MJF looms at Regal as if to say, is this kid for real? He turns back around only to see Buzzard charging at him and connects with a Dropkick that knocks him back into the corner! Buzzards gets back to his feet and this time hits a Running Hand-spring Elbow! MJF falls to the side and rolls out of the ring. He's not nearly as safe as he thinks though as Leyton climbs to the top rope. The Salt of the Earth doesn't even think twice about looking up until all of Buzzard comes crashing down on him with a Moonsault to the outside!
Mauro Ranallo: Despite his complete irreverence to the crowd, Buzzard still keeps his appealing high flying offense.
Corey Graves: Well yeah because that's your only offense when your 150 pounds soaking wet.
Tom Phillips: I think he's billed at 200 pounds.
Corey Graves: Oh yeah, and I'm sure he's 6'4 as well...
Regal closes in like he might do something but Buzzard catches him and tells him to back off old man. He grabs MJF and throws him back into the ring. He hops onto the apron and climbs up once more. Maxwell rises to his feet and turns around just in time to see Leyton jump off looking for the Meteroa! Mr. Friedman has it scouted though and just steps back, grabbing a hold of Buzzard and slamming him down to the mat with a Powerbomb! He grabs onto Buzzards' feet that are sticking up in the air after the impact and flips him over, pulling his head in forward between his legs and hitting a Piledriver! He makes the pin!
1 . . .
2 . . .
Buzzard kicks out! He rolls over and goes to crawl towards the ropes but MJF grabs his leg and pulls him back towards the center of the ring. He steps on the back of his knees and punches his ribs so he puts his hands at his side. From there, MJF grabs the arms and lifts him up into a Surfboard. With Buzzard being pretty light, MJF can keep him u in the air for quite awhile until he drops him down onto his knees. He lets one arm go free and just pulls back on his nose causing the ref to make the count to 4 before he breaks the hold.
Buzzard crawls over to the ropes and MJF goes to grab him from behind but Leyton blasts him with a Back Elbow to the face. MJF turns away holding his mouth, checking for blood but Leyton comes up behind him and jumps up, wrapping his legs around his neck and flipping him onto his head with a Poisonrana! Buzzard goes for the pin but MJF once again rolls to the outside!
Corey Graves: Smart wherewithal from the Salt of the Earth.
Tom Phillips: Looks like he's running away to me.
Corey Graves: You wouldn't know anything about strategy Phillips. Sometimes it's best to regroup and gather your thoughts.
Mauro Ranallo: Someone should give the Godfather a call with all these gathering of thots.
Corey Graves: .....Mauro...You need help.
Regal comes over and catches MJF before falls, not wanting to give this crowd the satisfaction of seeing a good man on his knees. Welp they're gonna see it anyways as Buzzard comes flying out of the ring, taking down both men with a Suicide Dive! They go crashing into the barricade and Buzzard grabs MJF and tosses him back into the ring. Buzzard climbs onto the apron and this time waits for MJF to get back to his feet. He slowly turns around and Buzzard jumps onto the ropes, coming off with a Springboard Lariat! Max goes down and Buzzard makes the cover!
1 . . .
2 . . .
MJF kicks out! Buzzard gets back up and brings MJF up along with him. He's behind him and gets him in a pumphandle position. He goes for the Buzzard Driver but MJF falls to his knees. Buzzard tries to overpower him but MJF uses his smarts to kick his leg out and catch it behind Buzzard's foot so he flip him over. Leyton gets frustrated and drops him only to start hitting him in the back with clubbing blows. MJF grabs onto his feet and takes him down, climbing over him and delivering some stiff punches as well. Buzzard blocks them as best he can before rolling away to the ropes.
Corey Graves: Look at Buzzard running away.
Tom Phillips: You just said it was smart wherewithal earlier.
Corey Graves: That was completely different.
MJF grabs Buzzard through the ropes and pulls him up, sticking his upper half through the ropes. He's got him in position for the Heat Seeker but but Buzzard goes to stand up straight and Back Body Drop's MJF over the ropes! Luckily for him, he's able to turn and grab onto the ropes to land on his feet on the apron. Leyton looks at him but eats a Superkick to the jaw! Or at least that was the plan but he catches MJF's foot and yanks it down and jumps up for an Enzuigiri! MJF falls through the ropes back inside the ring. Buzzard goes up to the top rope again and patiently waits for his opponent to get to his feet. Once he does, he leaps off and this time connects with the Meteroa! He makes the pin!
1 . . .
2 . . .
MJF kicks out! Buzzard gets to his feet and yells out in frustration, trying to pump himself up. The crowd however shits all over him. A loud "You suck" chant breaks out and Buzzard covers his ears, trying not to pay attention to them. It's obviously not working and he yells out to them to shut their mouth. MJF meanwhile is getting to his feet. Buzzard comes over and grabs a hold of him but MJF gives him a thumb right to the eye! Leyton turns away grabbing at the eye but MJF comes up behind him and hits the Double Cross! He goes for the cover!
1 . . .
2 . . .
3 . . .
Tony Chimel: Here is your winner, MJF!
Mauro Ranallo: Looks like the crowd may have gotten to Leyton Buzzard there at the end.
Corey Graves: It's one thing when you suck up to these people to have them cheer you, but losing because they hate you is just as embarrassing.
Fans in the front row add insult to injury as they hurl hateful words at Buzzard. MJF meanwhile doesn't give a care at all and happily walks to the back while flipping off the crowd as the show moves on.
The scene opens up in Batista’s office where The Miz is seen holding the Prime Time Medal and Goldust is seen holding the Hollywood Championship while Batista is doing push-ups.
The Miz: With all due respect, Big Dave, is it really necessary to warm up for a couple of jokes like Ciampa and Shark Boy?
Batista goes from push-up position to his feet in one quick motion as he looks at Miz.
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: Normally I would say no, but we’re in a crucial season. It’s the Road to Wrestlemania and the Royal Rumble is coming up and going into a match, regardless of who I’m facing, at less than one hundred percent is asking for an injury.
Batista drops back down to the floor in one quick motion, then rolls onto his back just as quickly as he now begins to do sit-ups.
The Miz: I mean that’s what we’re here for, right? Things get dicey or you need four extra hands, Goldust and I come with the hardware and rough them up.
Miz is smiling as he’s no doubt referring to and remembering what happened the previous week. Batista continues to warm up without responding when suddenly, the office door is heard opening and closing as Kyle O’Reilly and Bayley walk into the shot.
The Miz: What are you two doing in here?
Kyle's got some serious pouty face and his body language is screaming that he would rather be anywhere else in the world than in a room with The Guild right now. Bayley, on the other hand, is all smiles as she hands out cards to Batista and his pals.
Bayley: I know it's a little late, but in keeping with the Holiday spirit, we decided to get you three some cards. Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year, from the O'Reilly's to The Guild.
The Miz and Goldust open theirs. Batista can't be bothered. Whatever they were expecting - Hallmark's with petty cash or perhaps gift cards or whatever - what's actually inside is some regular looking paper with simple dark circles scribbled into the middle. Miz and Goldust show each other their respective gifts, wondering what the other got, and see that's its all the same. They don't understand, so Kyle explains.
KO'R: It's the Black Spot. It's from pirate culture. It's a promise from us to you that you're going to die soon.
The Diabetic Dragon looks like he could start with the killing right then and there, but his step-sister intervenes.
Bayley: Buuuuut, not yet, right Kyle?
He just keeps scowling at the A-Lister's.
Bayley: I said not yet, right Kyle?
He sighs defeatedly.
KO'R: Not yet. But soon. Real effing soon.
Bayley: This week, we've all got to be on the same page. Obviously we hate your guts and you guys are all insanely jealous of us, but for one night only, we've got to put all that bad blood aside so we can handle business. Now Dave, I know you've had some serious trouble with Shark Boy in the past, but luckily Kyle just put on a clinic on how to beat him. He KO'd Ciampa already, too. So really, all we need you guys to do is keep an eye on ol' Grado and DDP at ringside so that Kyle doesn't have anything to worry about while he's styling all over those guys. I hope that's not too much to manage.
Batista stops what he’s doing and stands up.
”The Hollywood Animal” Batista: Not doing it. I’m not thrilled about having to coexist but I’m not staying on the apron and watching Kyle have all the fun either. So either we put our differences aside for tonight, or I kick twice as much ass as I’m scheduled to. Your choice. Now get the fuck out of my office.
Kyle's about to take a swing at Batista but Bayley pulls him back and guides him out of the room.
Bayley: Fine. Do what you gotta do but don't mess this up for us, David.
KO'R: Yeah. Everyone knows the Avengers woulda stopped Thanos in Infinity War if it wasn't for the Guardians. So just stay outta my way when I get to handling my business.
Bayley: Let's get out of here.
KO'R: I'd love to. It stinks in here anyway.
The O'Reilly's leave Batista and The Guild boys to their pret-match workout. Revolution rolls on!
The scene opens with Cody Rhodes staring at the camera and he is well dressed in his fancy suit as he begins to speak.
Cody Rhodes: Welcome everyone. It is another day and a brand new year. Way to end 2022 with a bang. Yes, I have successfully defeated the UWF TV Champion Trevor one on one last week. I have kept my word and I have made a huge statement. I have already told time and time again that nobody wants to be on top of the mountain than I ever do. I have proven whenever I was done and I was on a losing streak. I will never ever stop fighting and getting myself back right up. I will always give it my all. Now, I have proven to make a huge statement to Mr. Trevor Lee himself. It is time for me to start getting the ball rolling and winning some precious gold. Trevor Lee, I would like to congratulate you on becoming one of the longest UWF TV Champions in history. But as far as I am concerned. Your run as UWF TV Champion has now come to a dead end because you have hit a huge roadblock in your path and that I am in your way. I have proven to you last week that you may have defeated me in the Fatal Four way match. But you have never pinned me or even defeated me in a single match. Now as for that UWF TV Championship that y9ou hold around your shoulder is concerned. It is time for a bit of a change of how things run here in UWF. It's time to crown a new UWF TV Champion and that man to step up to the plate to steal it is none other than yours truly.
Trevor Lee, I know what you are thinking. I must be out of my mind challenging you for your UWF TV Championship. I may be old and I just recently returned after being in retirement for so many years. But the point is it doesn't matter how long I have been out of the ring. I am always ready and determined to put on one of the amazing performances in this ring. I am telling you this that you may be UWF TV Champion right now. But I am honestly telling you that your time is up and it's my turn to take the reins away from you. It's time for a new mayor to run this town. I defeated you fair and square last week. So that proves to you that I am a huge threat to you and your reign as UWF TV Champion. You better believe that when we do meet once again in this very ring for the UWF TV Championship, Without a doubt, I will fight with everything I got through blood and tears to defeat you again to capture the UWF TV Championship. I can promise you Trevor that this isn't only a warning for you. But this is a warning to everyone else as well because the American Nightmare is back and it is time to start fulfilling my goals right now. Starting with the UWF TV Championship and ending it with the most prestigious championship of them all.....UWF Championship. UWF now belongs to the one and only American Nightmare......Cody Rhodes.
The scene fades and ends with Cody aggressively staring angrily into the camera.
Chimel: The following contest is set for one-fall!
"Knight Vision" begins to play throughout the arena and the capacity begins to groan because they know what time it is. It is time to titillate their juices with the arrival of the "Thursday Night Thriller". This is the "Million Dollar Megastar". This is LA Knight. Knight does not take long bursting through the curtain and out onto the stage. The reception he receives isn't warm whatsoever but LA Knight does not care. He soaks in the atmosphere while the jeers rain down on him.
Chimel: Introducing first, coming to the ring, from Baltimore, Maryland, weighing in at 230 pounds, he is the "Million Dollar Megastar", L...A....Knight!
As Chimel announces the brash star from Baltimore, Knight spells his name out in the air just to make sure that everyone knows exactly who he is.
Knight continues down the ramp towards the ring. The entire time he talks trash to all the people in the front row. He's not here for them; he's here for himself. As he reaches the end of the aisleway, he heads towards the hard camera before leaping onto the ring apron and posing for everyone to see him. There is no shortage in confidence in Knight tonight, as he enters the ring, climbs the nearest turnbuckle and throws up the "LA" hand sign.
Knight leaps off the top rope to the canvas and continues to prepare for the upcoming match he has.
YOU THINK YOU KNOW ME
A familiar phrase echoes throughout the arena, leading into the opening bassline of Headlong Flight by Rush and with it, a smattering of boos. Quieter than usual, but the crowd is still not fully won over. However, as each instrument joins into the song, smoke begins to fill the stage and before long, a figure walks out from behind the stage into the smoke. No bounding from one side to the other, Edge moves slowly, like a predator taking in his surroundings in order to best pounce on his prey.
Chimel: And his opponent, hailing from Toronto, Ontario, Canada, weighing in at 240 pounds. He is the Ultimate Opportunist, Edge!
Edge approaches the ring with his eyes fixed on Knight. The divisive crowd - those voices still booing or the few cheering, don't seem to be affecting him either way as he climbs up into the squared circle.
With both competitors now in the ring, Chimel steps through the ropes and heads to the outside. The camera cuts away from the squared circle to reveal a featured guest in the crowd tonight. There's an enormous pop in the arena when said audience member is put up on the titantron.
Ranallo: MAMA MIA! That's Spike Dudley!
Phillips: Spike's a Hall of Famer, a former Hardcore Champion, and six years ago at the Royal Rumble, he stunned the world when he won the UWF International Championship!
Graves: And now he's sitting in the crowd watching real superstars compete.
Ranallo: Spike's made a career out of exceeding expectations and proving doubters wrong, Corey. LA Knight caught his attention last week, now whether or not that leads to an in-ring return from Dudley or not remains to be seen, but I for one am happy to have him back even if it is just as a fan for the night.
Knight catches a glimpse of Dudley up on the big screen and scoffs like its the most ridiculous junk he's ever seen. Edge, who has his back to the titantron, pays it no mind. His focus is set squarely on his opponent as the Referee calls for the bell.
DING DING
VS 
When the bell sounds, Edge and Knight don't waste any time in locking up in the center of the ring. Classic collar-and-elbow, baybay. At first, LA looks be getting the advantage. Despite giving up three inches and ten pounds to the Canuck, the tenacious superstar has a lot of umph behind him tonight as he looks to make a statement win over a huge name.
Edge is caught off guard by the energy of his opponent. Everything about the guy's persona screams "flake", and after so many years in the biz, the Rated R Superstar has seen more than his fair share of disposable, cookie-cutter, wannabe superstars come and go. If he was expecting another DJ Gabriel or Ricky Ortiz, he's found a rude awakening in LA Knight.
The "Thursday Night Thriller" drives his shoulder - chip and all - up into Edge's chin as he pushes him towards the perimeter of the ring. After giving up three steps to the forward pressure, Edge finally gets his feet planted firm beneath his legs and halts the momentum. Knight sits on his hips, loads up his knees and explodes into his next thrust. Anticipating this stubborn rebuttal, Copeland steps to the side and lets Knight send himself past and into the ropes with a quick rotation.
As Edge has the other man sandwiched up against the cables now, the Referee steps in to intervene, asking for a clean break. Knight puts his hands up, indicating he's going to play nice. Edge trusts him about as much as he trusts a bag of one dozen, starving, crazed weasels. He backs up slowly - cautiously - fists clenched as he breaks the hold and creates some distance between.
Ranallo: Interesting. All signs point towards Edge looking to forge a new kind of path forward into the new year. The Ultimate Opportunist we've seen compete for years - the three-time world champ who just won the King of the Ring tournament and a UWF Championship after that - wouldn't have hesitated to cold-cock Knight on that break.
Phillips: Leading into this contest, he asked Knight whether he wanted to square off against that old, despicable, whatever-it-takes Edge, or one who would use the skills and talents he's always had all along. Besides the rule-breaker, Edge has been a tag team specialist, an innovator of extreme wrestling, and besides all that, has heaps of raw, wrestling talent. Given the success he's had relying on shortcuts, I think we've seen the tip of the iceberg here since he came back to the company last year.
Graves: You ever hear the saying "work smarter, not harder"? There's a reason being the Ultimate Opportunist worked so well for him. Now look, I get wanting to go back to the drawing board after a big L. Most guys fall off the face of the earth after they lose world championships. In the case of Edge, though, a complete overhaul has me worried. Isn't it a little late in the career to be teaching an old dog new tricks?
As Edge steps back, Knight reaches out to slap him across the face. The Canadian saw it coming, though, and snags the wrist before the hand can connect. In a flash, he drags Knight down to the mat, pushing his chest into the canvas before applying a vicious crossface in seconds. His hands clasp around LA's chin while he locks the arm between his legs. Yanking back, he looks to score an early submission over the brash competitor.
The fans cheer as they see that loudmouth get put through a world of hurt. Knight's eyes are bulging, his face is turning red, and whatever their feelings are about Edge, they're just happy to see somebody beat this guy up. The camera catches Spike Dudley smirking as he watches on.
Knight raises his free hand like he's about to tap. He brings it to the mat but instead of forfeiting the contest, he plants it and uses it as a post to lift up then roll himself over. With no shortage of effort, he brings Edge tumbling around over top and converts the crossface into a roll-up of sorts. The legs that were wrapped around his other arm remain tangled up and become a detriment for the Canuck as Knight uses them for leverage in the pinning combination. The Referee drops down to count it...
1...
2...
Edge releases his chin lock so he pop out before the final count.
Ranallo: Close call, there. Edge had the Crossface in deep - that was nice reversal by Knight.
Graves: LA Knight gets a lot of hate from the UWF Univese because he isn't shy about how talented he is, but there's no arguing that he's one of the best guys on the roster today. Everyone's making predictions about who's going to win the Rumble - if Knight scores a win over the former world champion right now, how can you say that he isn't the frontrunner?
Both competitors hustle to get back to their feet after the failed pin fall. Knight looks to take control with a side headlock only for Edge to push him away then connect with a stiff uppercut to the jaw. He follows up with a knee to the midsection, and after that, a European uppercut to correct LA's posture.
Edge then attempts to hook an arm around the neck, but the Baltimorean spins out to counter, vying for a neckbreaker. The Rated R Superstar slips out of his grip before he can drop down with the maneuver. The over-rotation sees Copeland getting behind his foe, and from there, he grabs the shoulders and sits back to nail an Edge-O-Matic!
Knight slams into the canvas and Edge reaches over to snag a leg to make the cover...
1...
2...
Knight kicks out at two.
Phillips: That's a nice move by Edge. Not enough to seal the deal, but it should put him firmly in control.
Ranallo: Uh oh. Don't look now, but we have an uninvited guest coming down.
Graves: We've already addressed the Dudley in the room.
Ranallo: No, not Spike. Look up the ramp.
Leyton Buzzard is coming down from the stage. The fans notice it shortly after Mauro sees and their attention turns from the action in the ring to the intrusion, booing the Brit as he approaches the squared circle.
Buzzard shouts at Edge to catch his attention. The Ultimate Opportunist looks over his shoulder and catches a glimpse of Buzzard, but this isn't his first rodeo. He isn't about to drop his guard entirely on Leyton's account. Trusting the Referee to worry about that problem for him, he gets right back to work and lifts Knight up off the mat.
Edge proceeds to feed a few jabs to the stomach to keep his opponent soft. The Official gives him a warning about the closed fists while keeping one eye locked in on Buzzard, who takes a spot standing at the edge of the apron. Unlike Spike, who still seems content to be watching from the stands, Leyton wants to get up close and personal as he heckles the Canadian.
It has little effect. Edge just keeps on ignoring him as he forces Knight into one of the far corners. Before the Ref can hassle him about Knight being caught up in the ropes, the Rated R Superstar grabs a wrist, intending to whip LA across the ring. Knight plants his feet and counters, launching Edge that way instead.
After careening into the turnbuckle, Edge stumbles away towards the center of the ring, gasping for breath. Knight meets him there, hoists him up, and connects with a big ol' powerslam! After planting his enemy into the mat, he hooks a leg for the pin...
1...
2...
Edge gets his shoulder up in time. Knight scowls at the Referee but doesn't let the perceived slow count slow him down. Brushing past the third man, LA heads back towards the corner, where he scales the ropes on rung at a time until he reaches the peak. The fans start to buzz at the prospect of witnessing some high-flying action, even if it comes courtesy of a man they despise.
The only person in the arena who doesn't look impressed is Spike Dudley, which Knight notices immediately. He scoffs at the Hall of Famer, then takes some time to flip him off and curse him out before turning his attention back towards his prone opponent.
Phillips: Knight is taking his sweet time up there, that's for sure.
Graves: Maybe if Spike Dudley would stop bothering him, he would have won this match already.
Buzzard is leaning under the bottom rope, trash talking Edge, who hasn't moved at all since taking the powerslam. Knight lines him up from his perch on the buckle then jumps off, aiming for an Elbow Drop like he's Randy Savage or something. If he connected, it would've scored him the win probably, too, except oh snap, Edge rolls out of the way just as he's about to get smushed.
The fans cheers as LA writhes around in pain. Edge scrambles to his feet and backs towards the ropes, lining up Knight for a Spear by the looks of the things. The sudden turning of the tide irks Buzzard something fierce, however. The Brit is beside himself as he climbs up on to the apron, reaming the Canadian out.
As hard as he was trying to ignore Leyton up to that point, the guy's too close for comfort now. Even with the Referee already telling the guy to scram, Edge comes out to take a swing at the intruder. Buzzard drops off the apron before he can take the hit, though he keeps on shouting at Edge as he retreats.
In all the commotion, Knight has some time to recover. He creeps up behind Edge and snags a sneaky roll-up outta nowhere! The Official slides in to count it, failing to notice the gripped tights as Knight does whatever he can to keep the former UWF Champ down...
1...
2...
3...
DING DING
YOUR WINNER...
LA KNIGHT
The fans boos their faces off as Knight's music hits the PA! He stands to have his hand raised but then quickly bails to avoid any backlash from Edge once he gets to his feet.
Ranallo: No! That was highway robbery! Between Buzzard's interference and Knight's foul play, Edge just got robbed of a win and the fans were robbed of an honest match!
Graves: Cry me a river, Mauro. It's not like Edge hasn't cheated to win a thousand times before. What goes around comes around.
Buzzard heads up the ramp quick but is mocking Edge the whole time. Knight is celebrating at ringside while Spike Dudley is shaking his head at him, looking real displeased about his shady tactics. Revolution rolls on!
As the camera cuts short from wherever it currently was, the sound of buzzing would fill every television set tuned in at home, static cutting in and out repeatedly. With the feed seemingly attempting to cut in every few moments, it may take a few tries, but eventually it all comes back.
The view that is shown, however, looks to be far different than what had been originally shown. Instead of showcasing any known part of the arena, or the backstage area, or anywhere else that the fans would know, it would rather be focused on a hillside view. To some, however, this view would be quite familiar, for if people manage to have the memory capable of recalling this, the sight of a single gravestone sitting atop the hill’s peak would bring back memories from May of last year.
With the sun setting in the background, its fall is accompanied by the sound of footsteps, as a more cinematic view of the gravestone becomes clear. The moss and vines that once covered the stone structure now sits on either side, clearing the way for the text to be revealed. Yet it still remains as illegible as it was when the UWF faithful first gazed upon it, Mother Nature’s damage having already taken its toll.
As the sound of footsteps draws closer, the distinct crunching of dirt beneath them gives clear indication that whoever is heading up the hill, they clearly are not coming alone. Sure enough, the view of the setting sun is cut off by two men, one standing a few inches taller than the other, but it is the smaller of the two who appears more distinguished. After all, with the unmistakable glitter that comes off of the sideplates of the championship belt wrapped around their waist, truly, this can only be one man.
”Well, well, well, well, well…ladies an’ gentlemen, ain’t this just the prettiest sight ya’ ever done seen in ya’ little ol’ lives?”
The camera zooms out, taking a moment to focus as the man who spoke these words turns around…and just as had been suspected from the glimpse of gold that they carry, standing before the lone unmarked gravestone is none other than the current UWF Television Champion, Mister Trevor Lee…and to his left? Why it’s “The Butcher” Andy Williams, a scowl on their face as per usual. After a few seconds of getting their positioning just right, Trevor Lee takes a deep breath, basking in the sight before them…before exhaling, and giving a large, confident smile towards all that surrounds him, including the camera.
Trevor Lee: ”Some eight or so months ago, I stood ‘fore each an’ every one o’ ya’ fine folk out there, an’ I introduced myself to y’all as a humble, hardworkin’ fella’ from the small town known as Harlan, Kentucky.”
Taking in the nostalgia of such an event, despite its relative recency in the grand scheme of the world itself, Trevor Lee doesn’t dawdle too long on the past, instead worrying more about the present, his gaze returning to the camera’s eye.
Trevor Lee: ”An’ in those eight or so months, I learned a lot ‘bout the real world. After all, back ‘fore I gone an’ joined this ‘ere fine federation, my life was quite sheltered, to tell ya’ the truth. I didn’t exactly ‘ave much goin’ for me back then, jus’ a humble lil’ town to run an’ a few fine townsfolk who were willin’ to pitch in an’ help make the community I found myself elected leader o’ thrive. Back then, I was lil’ more than a wide-eyed kid, wanderin’ ‘round my own town like it was a kingdom wit’ myself as the king o’ it all. I didn’t ‘ave no worries, no real responsibilities, jus’ a few promises made ‘ere an’ there to a few fine folk that I would do my part.”
A beat of silence follows, Lee collecting his thoughts.
Trevor Lee: ”But then…”
Lee chuckles.
Trevor Lee: ”Then…then, then, then…I got brought into the wide world o’ professional ‘rasslin, an’ everythin’ done gone changed ‘round me. No longer was I the king o’ the castle, no longer was I the Belle o’ the ball, instead I was just seen as some country bumpkin, a hick from the east en’ of Kentucky who ain’t had a gosh darn clue what he was doin’, a nobody from nowhere who was goin’ to amount to nothin’ in the gran’ scheme of things.”
With a calm demeanor to him, it feels as though the evening chill of January is permeating through the camera, somehow, with Mister Trevor Lee keeping such poise to himself that it truly showcases his political side.
Trevor Lee: ”But then the wins started rackin’ on up. I beat the likes o’ John Cena, the likes o’ good ol’ Mikey boy back when he was playin’ make-believe that he was an actual honest-to-God professional ‘rassler, the likes o’ Dean Ambrose. These were men who in the past were seen as nigh unbeatable warriors, an’ I jus’ came in an’ brushed them off to the side like they were nothin’. People still didn’t take me seriously, sayin’ it was all flukes, sayin’ I couldn’t score a ‘proper’ victory to save my own hide…”
After another moment passes without any more words, Trevor Lee unhooks the UWF Television Championship from around his waist, and holds it to his face, the sun’s sinking light gleaming off of its centerpiece, giving a brilliant reflection towards the lens, while also keeping Trevor’s vision intact.
Trevor Lee: ”July the 10th happened, an’ the whole complexion o’ the U-Dubya-Eff got turned right on its head. On July 10th, I walked into my first ever shot at the big time, I walked into only my secon’ ever Pay-Per-View encounter, a lumberjack matchup with mista’ Viper…an’ at the en’ o’ the night, I walked on outta’ that there ring wit’ this fine, majestic piece o’ gold wrapped ‘round my waist.”
Smiling brighter than the belt can possibly gleam, Lee keeps his eyes trained on the camera.
Trevor Lee: ”I walked outta’ Final Battle as the ONLY new champion in the entirety o’ the U-Dubya-Eff…an’ yet, people still doubted me.”
Lee shakes his head, as if he is in disbelief of how he was received in the past by the people.
Trevor Lee: ”I was told that I wouldn’t ‘ave beaten mista’ Viper if it weren’t for the aid given to me by my good frien’ ‘ere Andy. I was told that I would drop this ‘ere gold soon enough, an’ would be left as nothin’ more than a footnote in its legacy, that I would be forgotten as a mere one-an’-done. Yet even wit’ the people sayin’ that, thinkin’ that, believin’ that…all those words did was prove the age ol’ adverb: actions speak louder.”
Lee clutches the championship closer to him as he speaks, his grin returning to his face after the show he made out of the people’s doubts.
Trevor Lee: ”At Summerslam, I was the ONLY champion who walked outta’ that event wit’ the gold that they walked in wit’ still wrapped ‘round their waists, an’ everyone called me out again. They said I was nothin’ more than a paper champion. They said that I only won ‘cause Andy saved me again, they said that that Bristol-born Bastard had me dead to rights, that I woulda’ been down an’ out had it not been for an alleged save, despite the fact I never gone ordered for Andy to help me out in that situation in the first place, an’ it was his own decision makin’ skills that led him to interfere in that match while I had things perfectly under control.”
”At Bad Blood, everyone an’ their mother thought that mista’ Buzzard had me dead to rights. Everyone went into that match rootin’ for the supposed underdog, rootin’ for the man who destroyed somethin’ that was to provide sanctity an’ sanctuary to those in my town who needed it! They chose him over me, all ‘cause they couldn’t fathom the idea that I was more than some stereotypical good ol’ southern boy, that I was somethin’ better than any of them had ever plum done seen in their lives! At Bad Blood, while every narrative out there made it appear that mista’ Buzzard was the underdog goin’ up ‘gainst the big bad wolf, I was the one havin’ to fight for my gosh darn life in that steel cage, an’ ya’ know what happened? The real underdog o’ that match, after havin’ their own hometown invaded, after havin’ their church destroyed, after havin’ every hurdle in mista’ Carter’s book thrown in front of him, overcame the odds an’ walked away wit’ the same piece o’ gold that they walked into that there steel cage wit’! I walked into that steel cage as champion, an’ at the end o’ the fight, I was the only man walkin’ outta’ that cage…an’ it was wit’ my gold still in hand.”
The UWF TV Title now rests against Trevor Lee’s chest, as his grin widens.
Trevor Lee: ”An’ then came Slammiversary, an’ even wit’ two other people thrown in my way, even wit’ the combined efforts o’ both mista’ Megastar an’ mista Rattlesnake, who walked away the victor? Me. I walked away as the reignin’, defendin’, un-dis-pu-ted U-Dubya-Eff Television Champion…an’ now? Well…look at me now.”
Hoisting the TV Title up onto his shoulder, Lee would take another deep breath, exhaling out to reset his masked presence, preventing any cracks from slipping through too early.
Trevor Lee: ”Now…now I stan’ ‘fore each an’ every one o’ ya’ as far, far more than just some stereotype, than just some guy pickin’ up fluke wins, than just a one-an’-done, just a paper champion, just another big bad wolf. I was made to listen to each an’ every one o’ ya’ fine folk throw nothin’ but disdain an’ ignorant scorn towards myself, forced to hear ya’ lies an’ slander, an’ now I just ‘ave one single thing to say to all o’ y’all, right here, right now:”
That serpentine grin returns to his face, as the TV Title finds itself off his shoulder and in his grasp once more.
Trevor Lee: ”One hundred an’ seventy NINE days.”
Just from saying those words, Trevor Lee’s face turns to that of purified euphoria, as he embraces that sentence with open arms and tightly shut eyes.
Trevor Lee: ”ONE HUNDRED AN’ SEVENTY NINE DAYS, MEANS I AM BETTER THAN EVERYONE WHO HAS COME BEFORE ME, AN’ BETTER THAN EVERYONE WHO WILL COME AFTER ME!”
Opening his eyes, Lee has a wide, manic look to him, as he lets his raw emotions let loose for this blue moon occasion.
Trevor Lee: ”I AM BETTER THAN DANIEL BRYAN! I AM BETTER THAN REY MYSTERIO! I AM BETTER THAN ALEISTER BLACK! I AM EVEN BETTER THAN ‘THE HORROR KING’ HIMSELF! I…AM THE SINGLE GREATEST U-DUBYA-EFF TELEVISION CHAMPION…O’ ALLLLL TIIIIIMMMEEEEE~!”
Upon declaring this, Trevor Lee wouldn’t just chuckle, or laugh…the man would outright CACKLE in celebration, for he had done it. He had become more than just a footnote in history, he had become a part of history. He had become history ITSELF even, as his name now adorns the record books of the UWF’s illustrious eleven-year existence. He had become THE single greatest UWF Television Champion in history…
But as the cackling dies down, and the sun fully sets behind him, leaving the hillside view plunged in the early stages of darkness, the grin of Mister Trevor Lee falls into a melancholic expression of neutrality. A dry chuckle follows soon after, a dying breath from his prior supervillain-esque guffaw.
Trevor Lee: ”...This piece o’ Harlan Gold an’ I…we’ve been through a lot, huh?”
Looking up to Andy for confirmation, a rare nod of his head gives Lee the go-ahead to continue on.
Trevor Lee: ”We’ve had our fair share o’ wins…our fair share o’ losses…I’ve caused blood to be spilled by its golden center, an’ I’ve watched my own blood drip down onto the same gilded plate after each successful defense…”
As Lee is saying all of this, there is a gleam that can be seen in his eyes, as he regards the UWF Television Championship with pride in his voice….however, as he winds down, the whitened-knuckle grip he uses to clutch onto said piece of Harlan Gold…loosens.
Trevor Lee: ”But now that I’ve done an’ broken the record…well…”
Lee’s face seems to fall further from there, taking one more look at the UWF Television Championship…before a sickening smirk forms, and the title drops from his hands, the golden plate hitting straight onto the dirt beneath him.
Trevor Lee: ”...I think we all know that this piece o’ gold has far outlived its usefulness, don’t we?”
Another look to Andy, and he gives a nod in response to Lee’s declaration. With the title now on the ground, Lee’s smug visage would grace the eye of the camera once more.
Trevor Lee: ”Well, folks…I guess the only question now is…where does mista’ Trevor Lee go from here? An’ I think…I think I got a grand idea o’ how to follow up such a record-setting performance.
Lee takes a moment to compose himself once more, before giving a chilling glare into the camera, that serpentine grin forming once more.
Trevor Lee: ”Royal Rumble…January 29th…I’m goin’ to enter that Royal Rumble match, an’ whether it be from numba’ one or numba’ thirty, whether I eliminate one man or twenty nine men, whether it be by hook or by crook, ya’ know what’s goin’ to happen?”
”My U-Dubya-Eff career is goin’ to go…To. The. Moon.”
With that final remark made, Trevor Lee would be all too keen to walk off, completely disregarding the UWF Television Championship as he steps over it. With the focus left on the belt, the sound of footsteps crunching against the dirt beneath it returns…but after a few seconds, the TV Title is lifted from the ground, and brought into the hands of “The Butcher”, who eyes it with a curious glance. After a few moments of examining it, Andy holds the dirtied gold towards his face…and a smile of his own forms.
”The Butcher” Andy Williams: ”If Trevor isn’t going to come back for you, then soon enough, I will…”
Keeping hold of the UWF TV Title, Andy soon walks off to follow his friend, letting the scene close on the darkened hillside view of Harlan, Kentucky…
The Revolution live feed disappears from the arena and moves to a convention center, where a Horror showcase event is taking place.
Inside the camera picks up on a number of different goings on, such as two Freddy & Jason cosplayers doing a pose off, someone taking a picture of the glass case that contains the Annabelle doll, and a nerd eating candy that appears to resemble the shape of Frankenstein’s head. As the feed delves deeper into the event, it picks up on a line which is forming in the direction of a table, indicating that a signing appears to be taking place. As the camera runs along the side of the lengthy line, it reaches the end and we see Danhausen sat at the table signing autographs for those in the queue. Despite not being a notable member of the horror genre, the UWF Intercontinental Champiom still appears to have drawn a decent sized crowd his way and has some words to share with the camera as he spots it close by.
Danhausen
Look! Look at this! Yes, Danhausen’s powers know no limit or equal, as you can see by his ability to draw in these particular set of fanhausens, who are all more than happy to contribute to Danhausen’s sack of money in exchange for a scribble of some sort on a piece of paper or merchandise.
Danhausen pauses for a moment to sign another autograph for a cosplayer dressed as a swamp monster of some description. Danhausen shows his appreciation for their costume effort and accepts the offer of taking a picture with them too, making sure to stand up and perform his signature cursing pose, only this time it’s in a more playful manner. Once the photo is taken the cosplayer moves on and Danhausen continues to address the viewers via the camera.
Danhausen
Now you are probably wondering why exactly Danhausen is here, considering this is not his usual human interaction environment. Simple answer really, well aside from the obvious treasure hunting that is, Danhausen saw an advertisement of some sort for this very evil event, and so he felt it was his civic duty to add a very nice element to it and keep the balance in check. Besides, it is but another opportunity for Danhausen to parade his Intercointinental Title to the masses, and to also begin drumming up some additional support ahead of the Monarch Earthquake, a match that Danhausen intends to make the next stage of his Ultimate Wrestling evolution.
Danhausen takes another brief pause to sign an autograph, this time for someone wearing a shirt with a Michael Myers mask on it, before resuming with his words once again.
Danhausen
Speaking of the Monarch Earthquake, and seeing as how Danhausen was unable to go into it in further detail last week due to a rude interruption, Danhausen is also on the lookout for some potential inspiration to help him through the match. And what better place to do so than here, a building inhabited by weirdos! Little do the people and creatures in here know, but they could well be the key to Danhausen’s greatest success to date. You understand if so though that Danhausen is under no obligation to share potential future royalties with them of course, but they can at least take a sense of pride in knowing that they assisted a Danhausen in need by contributing to both his sack and money and the biggest win of his careerhausen.
As Danhausen gets ready to sign another autograph, he notices something out of place.
Eddie Kingston
“Danhausen ..”
This was all wasteful. A complete and utter waste of time. He didn’t understand, this aspect of it. He didn’t get what this was all about, but he didn’t have too. He wasn’t doing this, all of this for this part of it. Meets, greets, signing shit, meeting people, he loathed people. If people liked him, fine. If they hated him, fine. He was not here, to win any popularity contests, he was here, to be the fucking best that he can be and he can only be that, if people like Danhausen, were fucking dealt with.
Eddie Kingston
“You fucking deaf or something. I told you last week. I fucking stood right before you and looked you in the eye and told you. I am done with all this bullshit. I am done with people like you. I am just done in general, in being the nice fucking guy. Trying to hold myself back and play it nice and safe. It has gotten me nowhere, but then here you are. Some little freak. Having all the success within the world, success we both know that you don’t deserve. Championships, high profile matches, everything someone like you, should be nowhere near.”
Fuck it. As he gripped the edge of the table and flipped it, spilling everything that was on it all over the floor. As he gripped Danhausen by the shirt, digging and curling his fingers in and dragged this little shit towards him, face to face as he lifted him a little bit more, up of the ground. Not giving shit at the shouting behind him. If anyone tried to get in there way, he would fucking put them down. This was between himself and Danhausen. This didn’t concern anyone else.
Eddie Kingston
“Look at you. Fucking pathetic. I give you a warning and instead of doing something about it. Instead of being a man. You are here. Jerking off with these fucking idiots as well. As if anything I said didn’t matter at all. It makes me sick. That all the work I have put in for two years, means jack shit when there is someone like you here, who has more than I have ever had. Look at this shit on the floor. Look at it all. It means nothing to me. I told you, I was gunning for you. That you were next on my new year list. No more fucking around, no more waiting. No more of any of this. I am done waiting my turn. I called you out last week and you have the fucking gull. The balls. To ignore me and play it off like no fucking big deal, fuck you.”
As he let him go, pushing him back from him as he grabbed the flipped table, picking it up on one end and throwing it out of there way to spill more of the bullshit on it over the floor, as he pushed right by Danhausen and placed his hands on the stands behind them, pulling them down, one at a time, to crash on the floor, knocking down the shirts, and whatever other grab Danhausen was trying to pedal off to these idiots onto the floor. Were was his stand! Were was his line of people wanting his autograph! Fuck all of this nonsense.
Eddie Kingston
“Get this through your thick fucking head Danhausen. I am not kidding around. This and trust me on this. This is your last fucking warning. I am coming for you now, sooner than you think and if you don’t begin to take this seriously, then you are in, for a world of fucking hurt, trust me. I am not fucking around here anymore. If you don’t take me seriously, if you don’t show me, why people think you are more worthy to be a champion, to be a main event player than me, then Danhausen .. your fucked and the people will see what I see. That you are nothing. Always have been. Always will be. The people will finally wake up and see the Danhausen of the worlds, are not worth the investment, but Eddie Kingston, well fuck .. he is, because he is a man, who can back up his words. So when I say I am going to take everything from you Danhausen, that is the fucking truth.”
As, “See Me Shine” by Bone Thugz-n-Harmony begins to play, the UWF fans immediately begin to boo as they know who the theme music belongs to and who they’re inevitably about to have to look at. Not missing a beat, out walks Batista with the Hollywood Championship proudly on him as he makes his way down the ramp to the ring.
Tony Chimel: From Washington, D.C. Weighing in at two hundred and ninety pounds. He is the reigning Hollywood Champion and the leader of The Guild, the, “Hollywood Animal”, BAATIIISSSSTTTTAAAA!!!
Batista goes to the nearest turnbuckle and ascends it, using the opportunity to show off the belt once more before stepping down and getting ready for the match ahead.
A lion synthethetic violion whispers through the air like a pretodactyl screech. Soon, a breakbeat ripples beneath. Strobe lights illuminate the entrance way. When the riff kicks in, it heralds the arrival of the Diabetic Dragon. Kyle O'Reilly storms out on to the ramp, fists and jaw clenched, looking like the quiet kid on a bad day while his step-sister Bayley follows close behind. He does some shadow boxing at the head of the ramp while Tony announces his stats.
Chimel: Being accompanied to the ring by Bayley, from Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada... weighing in at 200 pounds... Kyle O'Reilly!
Our beloved Canuck's pace is in lock-step with the groove en route to the squared circle. The fans in the arena born on the good side of 9/11 know the words and can't help but sing along when the chorus drops. Feeding off that energy, Kyle is spiritually compelled to shred some air guitar as he steps through the ropes to compete. He rocks the heck out with the UWF Universe before getting ready to friggin fight. Bayley, meanwhile, lurks and lingers on the fringe of the squared circle, ready to fight dirty if it comes to that.
As Like a Villain blasts over the speakers Ciampa walks out onto stage, hood up and looking down, followed by DDP. The crowd cheers pair loudly, Ciampa would stand focussed as DDP would lower his hood down and Ciampa would look at the ring, not taking his focus off it
Tony Chimel: Making his way to the ring and being accompanied by DDP from Boston, Massachusetts weighing in tonight at 201lbs he is The "Psycho Killer" Tommaso Ciampa.
Making his march down to the ring, Ciampa would bump fists with some audience members but would keep his eyes on his challenger. Getting to the ring steps, he would kneel down with one leg and look like he's saying a mantra of sorts before slapping the steps to make a loud noise before running up them and getting into the ring.
Ciampa then jumps down from the turnbuckle and looks out at the audience, nodding he jumps down and hands his jacker to DDP, getting into the corner he does some stretches before turning round to sit in the corner, waiting for whats to come.
GIVE ME A SHELL YEAH!
The cowbell begins to tap before the guitars come in to signal the arrival of UWF's resident 'Shellraiser'. Nazareth's 'Hair of The Dog' blasts over the PA system as Shark Boy wastes little time in marching out from behind the curtain full of piss and vinegar, he's mouthing off to everyone and anyone in his immediate path. The crowd at ringside reach at Shark Boy but he maintains his focus on the ring stomping his way down the ramp continuing to mouth off the entire way down the ramp towards ringside.
Tony Chimel: Introducing, from the Deep Blue Sea, weighing in at 205 pounds... SHARK BOY!
Shark Boy stomps up the steps and through the ropes into the ring, he makes a b-line for the corner where he heads to the top rope and throws out the fin-salute to the crowd before throwing his two fists high into the air for all the Shark-o-holics out there. Shark Boy repeats this at the three other corners before taking off his vest and waiting for the bell to sound.
VS
DING DING DING
Kyle wants to start things off for his team and Batista is more than happy to not have to get his hands dirty. Ciampa is ready to beat his ass yet again but Shark Boy wants to avenge his loss and tells Ciampa to tag him in. Tommaso gives him a look but decides to tag him in. Shark Boy comes in and starts jacking his jaw. Kyle comes up to him and starts throwing some well placed shots to the body. Shark Boy retaliates with stuff punches, no real rhyme or reason to where he hits, he just wants to slug it out. Kyle goes low with a kick to the back of the knee and follows that up with a Roundhouse Kick to the side of the head! Shark Boy ends up rolling to the outside. Kyle looks around and then takes off looking for a Suicide Dive. As he's coming though, Grado stands in the way with his hands up stopping Kyle dead in his tracks. Bayley ain't gonna let that shit fly though. She walks over and gives Grado a shove. The two are mouthing off and DDP comes in between the two, telling them to let the wrestlers in the match deal with the fighting. Miz and Goldust come over and tell DDP to mind his own business.
Tom Phillips: This match has just started and the referee already needs to gain control of this match.
Mauro Ranallo: All we need is Michelle Tanner and we'll have a Full House at ringside here tonight.
Corey Graves: You know, sometimes I just despise you Mauro...
While all 5 people are arguing on the outside, Kyle gets on the apron and jumps over them to take out Shark Boy! Kyle starts stomping down on the UWF Champion until he picks him up and tosses him back in. Kyle slides in after him and comes up behind him as he's getting up. He wraps his arms around him to give him a German Suplex but Shark Boy throws an elbow to the side of his head to break free. He runs to the ropes but Kyle follows him over and gives him a Knee to the gut as soon as he hits the ropes. O'Reilly smiles and goes to send him off the ropes but Sharky reverses. Kyle comes off the ropes and runs into a Thez Press! Shark Boy beats on him with closed fists until the ref makes him get off. Kyle gets to his feet but looks a little dazed. Shark Boy grabs him and uses the ropes to shoot off into a Tornado DDT! He makes the pin!
1 . . .
2 . . .
O'Reilly kicks out! Shark Boy picks him back up but Kyle shoves him away into his own corner. Ciampa wants a piece of the action and tags himself in. Kyle looks at Batista to see if he wants in but Big Dave doesn't react so Kyle figures he's gonna keep on fighting. Ciampa walks up to Kyle calmly and dares him to try and knock him out again. Don't ever give Kyle a chance at an open shot. O'Reilly gives him a Calf Kick followed by a Knee Lift in the clinch and ends it with a Leg Sweep. He finishes it off with a Pointed Knee Drop right on Ciampa's face! He makes the pin!
1 . . .
A quick kickout from Ciampa. Kyle brings his opponent back up and lifts him onto his shoulders. From there he starts to spin round and round until he plants him with the Velocicopter! O'Reilly moves in to make the pin but Ciampa rolls away to the ropes. Kyle crawls to the ropes and uses them to help himself up and then Batista now decides to tag himself in.
Corey Graves: Looks like Batista gave Kyle enough time and he couldn't get the job done so he has to take matters into his own hand.
Mauro Ranallo: Just call it what it is Corey, he's coming in to steal the thunder after Kyle just did all the hard work.
Corey Graves: He could barely stay up on two feet. Batista is doing him a favor.
Batista is looking smug as hell while Kyle shoots him a death stare. He walks over to Ciampa but the former Intercontinental Champion rushes forward and tackles him into the corner. He gives him the Batista special and starts giving him Shoulder Thrusts into the corner until he falls to a seated position. He then runs to the adjacent corner and comes back with a Running Knee Strike to the face! Ciampa drags him out of the corner and makes the pin!
1 . . .
2 . . .
Batista kicks out! Ciampa picks him up but now Batista returns the favor by picking him up and tackling him into the corner! He doesn't go for the shoulder thrusts this time, instead opting for a Running Clothesline in the corner. He then grabs Ciampa's bald head with both hands and simply tosses him across the ring! He looks pissed that Ciampa nearly embarrassed him and tells Kyle to watch what he does next. He picks up Tommaso from behind and gets him in the Full Nelson. He lifts him up for the slam but Ciampa turns it into an Arm Drag. Batista rolls through back to his feet and faces Ciampa only to eat a couple of slaps to the face followed by a Knee Strike to complete the Sicilian Barrage! He makes the pin once more.
1 . . .
2 . . .
Batista kicks out! Big Dave crawls over to his corner but the #1 contender to the UWF Championship grabs his foots and drags him back towards the center of the ring. Batista turns around and uses his lower body strength to pull him in and kick him off causing Ciampa to go flying back into his corner. Shark Boy tags himself in and comes running over and knocks O'Reilly off the apron before Batista can get to him! Shark Boy proceeds to opens up a can of whoop bass on Batista and stomps a fish hole in him and walks it dry. He walks away putting that sailor's mouth to good use, ironic since fish probably hate sailors but who cares. Certainly not Shark Boy. Batista gets to his feet in the corner and Shark Boy comes right back over and proceeds to give him the 10 punches.
Mauro Ranallo: Those punches are like getting hit by the waves of the ocean as you try to go further and further out to sea.
Corey Graves: Ehh that one's a bit of a stretch Mauro.
Mauro Ranallo: He's been here for like a year already it's tough to come up with new shark puns okay?
Sharky hits about 6 of them until Batista grabs him and walks with him toward the center of the ring in perfect position for the Batista Bomb. Shark Boy leans back to go for a Hurrincanrana but Big Dave simply uses his strength to hoist him back up. Ciampa however comes in behind him and gives him a Chop Block causing him to fall backwards. He and Shark Boy then team up and start stomping down on the Hollywood Champion. O'Reilly has seen enough and slides into the ring kicks Ciampa with a Liu Kang Bicycle Kick! Shark Boy goes to swing on him but Kyle gets his arms up to block it. He then kicks the UWF Champion in the gut and gives him the ol' Ax and Smash combo! With Kyle being the only man left standing, he grabs Batista and drags him over to his corner, exiting out onto the apron and then tagging himself in.
The Diabetic Dragon comes in to finish off Shark Boy but gets caught with a Spinebuster! Shark Boy grabs Kyle and brings him to his corner to make the tag to Ciampa. Together then give him a Double Suplex. Ciampa picks up Kyle and spins him out for the Psycho Kutter but O'Reilly smashes him in the back of the head with a Back Elbow. Ciampa turns around to face him and just straight up slaps him in the face. O'Reilly refuses to go down and yells at him to hit him harder. Ciampa obliges with a stiff Headbutt that knocks O'Reilly clear out!
Mauro Ranallo: Shades of their last match, this could be it for O'Reilly!
1 . . .
2 . . .
O'Reilly gets the shoulder up at 2! Eagle eyed viewers will remember that it was Kyle's own headbutt that ended the last match. Ciampa wants to put the Diabetic Dragon down for good and he lifts him up for the Project Ciampa. Kyle however grabs onto the arm and twists around to hang off of him in an Armbar! Ciampa is in immediate pain and it's looking like he might actually tap. Instead he just starts booting Kyle in the face as he's hanging upside down until he finally breaks the hold. Ciampa goes to his corner and tags Shark Boy back into the match. The UWF Champion runs right to Kyle but get caught with a Harpoon Torpedo! Kyle lays laid out in the ring looking just about done. Bayley screams that they need to check his blood sugar but she's not allowed in the ring. Kyle uses all the strength he has left to pick himself and crawls to his corner. Batista has his hand out for the tag but when O'Reilly gets close enough, he drops off the apron like we all knew he would.
Tom Phillips: Son of a bitch!
Corey Graves: What did you expect Phillips!
Tom Phillips: I expected him to do the right thing.
Corey Graves: He is, Kyle doesn't deserve to have a partner like the Hollywood Champion.
Bayley yells at Batista but Goldust and Miz ambush her from behind! DDP and Grado come over to help even the odds but The Guild high tail it. Grado may not be on the best of terms with Bayley but he still helps her to her feet. Kyle looks out of it but he still manages to pick himself up. The problem is, as soon as he turns around, he's kicked in the gut and planted with a Chummer! Shark Boy then makes the pin.
1 . . .
2 . . .
3 . . .
Tony Chimel: Here are your winners, Tommaso Ciampa and the UWF Champion, Shark Boy!
Shark Boy drags Kyle to the apron letting Bayley check on his blood sugar. The Guild are laughing as they head to the back, happy to just let Kyle die if need be. Ciampa comes in with the UWF Championship and goes to hand it to Shark Boy. Sharky takes it but Ciampa is still holding on with a tight grip. He's looking down at the title that could be his and seems to be lost in a trance. Shark Boy yells at him and yanks it free, seemingly waking him up from it. Ciampa and Grado stare at one another while DDP and Grado come into the ring to make sure nothing goes down as the show comes to a close.
END OF SHOW
Credits
Hogan vs Guerrero - Dresden
Knight vs Edge - Fauche
MJF vs Buzzard, Kyle/Batista vs Ciampa/Shark Boy - Danny
