Post by Danny on Jun 28, 2019 20:56:45 GMT -6
As the logo is seen, things go live to the inside of the arena as pyrotechnics go off from the stage and the camera pans around to get a shot of the Revolution fans in attendance before panning to the commentary table where Corey Graves, Mauro Ranallo, and Tom Phillips are standing by.
Tom Phillips: Hello ladies and gentlemen and welcome to Revolution! I’m Tom Phillips.
Mauro Ranallo: I’m Mauro Ranallo.
Corey Graves: And I’m Corey Graves. It’s the last show before Backlash and what a fitting night of competition leading into that event we’ve got planned.
Tom Phillips: Like the strange bedfellows theme we’ve got going on. For starters, opponents in a Hardcore match on Sunday, the “Bad Boy” Joey Janela teams up with Jimmy Havoc to take on The Usos.
Mauro Ranallo: It’s Jimmy versus Jimmy and Jey versus Jey if you remove the ‘o’ from Joey. Speaking of ‘o’, we’ve got “O”-ney Lorcan in action against Bray Wyatt.
Corey Graves: This isn’t the Firefly Pun House, asshole, it’s the man from the Firefly Fun House seeking redemption for past losses. Similar to Drew McIntyre when he takes on the man that beat Bray Wyatt last week, Chris Brookes.
Tom Phillips: Will it be Armageddon setting upon the UWF again or can Chris keep the momentum going? And momentum is also the name of the game when the Television Champion Aleister Black teams with his NSDS counterpart WALTER to take on the World Warriors.
Mauro Ranallo: World Warriors would certainly benefit from a return to the win column but against that mass of humanity? I’m not sure. But they aren’t the only ones going against incredible odds as Noam Dar takes on The Velveteen Dream.
Corey Graves: No doubt Neville’s going to be keeping his eye on that one. But Neville should be sure to keep his eyes on his opponent as well as he throws down with Kevin Nash.
Tom Phillips: Nash may be the one doing the throwing and down is where he’ll be aiming. Which brings us to the other strange bedfellows match-up.
Mauro Ranallo: Chris Jericho: arguably the most prominent name around to beat Vinny Marseglia. A man that beat Minoru Suzuki last week and looks to do the same to Samoa Joe at Backlash.
Corey Graves: Johnny Morrison: the man that lost to Vinny Marseglia just last week and will do battle with AJ Styles one-on-one in just a few nights.
Tom Phillips: And Vinny himself: the man that will face Suzuki on Sunday, has beaten Samoa Joe before, and as stated, beat Morrison last week and has history with Jericho.
Mauro Ranallo: That’s one team. On the other, Samoa Joe: who has that history with Vinny and has his eyes set on Jericho.
Corey Graves: AJ Styles: has his eyes on Morrison and would no doubt love to beat the current UWF Champion as well as the former champs.
Tom Phillips: And Minoru Suzuki: the man looking to prove his dominance and avenge his loss to Jericho as well as soften Vinny up for Backlash.
Mauro Ranallo: A lot of moving parts in that one, but I can’t wait to watch it.
Corey Graves: All that and more tonight!
The lights go out in the arena and everyone is on edge. They suddenly come back on and Bray Wyatt is standing in the ring. He's got his classic outfit on and yells out for people to follow the buzzards until his opponent makes his entrance.
Dropkick Murphy’s “I’m Shipping Up to Boston” begins to blare through the arena’s speakers, as do a series of cheers from the audience in attendance. From behind the curtain emerges the Boston Butcher himself, Oney Lorcan, who marches briskly down the ramp with a ‘Number One’ hand gesture in the air, determination and aggression written on his face and traced in every step he takes.
Tony Chimel: “Making his way to the ring, from Boston Massachusetts, weighing in at 200 pounds, ONEY LORCAN!”
Reaching ringside, Oney slaps a few hands of the fan’s hands as they extend themselves, and hops up onto the ring apron. A modest “OH-NEY RULES” chant breaks out, as he throws up a big ‘Number One’ hand sign on the middle turnbuckle, before hopping back down and stepping through the ring ropes. Oney performs the same gesture again, this time to the audience as he wildly throws himself at the ring ropes.
VS 
DING DING DING
Wyatt comes walking out of the corner and opens his arms up. He tells Oney that he is a changed man and dares him to strike him. Lorcan walks right up to him, not scared in the slightest and just slaps the shit out of him! Wyatt looks stunned as he grabs his face, almost like he can't believe he feels pain. He doesn't have much time to process this though and Lorcan just starts unloading with european uppercut after european uppercut. Wyatt is pushed back into the corner where Oney runs at him and damn near takes his head off with a running dropkick in the corner. Oney runs right back to the opposite end, hitting the corner hard as he runs over once more for a second dropkick. Bray's hair is flying all over the place as Lorcan comes back for a third dropkick, then a fourth and a fifth. The crowd is firmly behind Oney as he throws Wyatt out of the corner and goes up top. Wyatt slowly gets to his feet but gets taken down immediately with a missile dropkick!
Mauro Ranallo: I have a feeling Wyatt is going back to the firefly fun house after this.
Corey Graves: It looks like he didn't learn his lesson last week and I doubt he gets any more chances after tonight.
Wyatt has a far away look in his eyes, like he doesn't even know where he's at. He down on one knee, trying to process everything but Lorcan comes flying over with a running blockbuster! Nobody is sure if it's the power of the funhouse or Wyatt just simply doesn't know when to give up but Bray somehow fights back up to his feet, even though it doesn't look like anyone's home. Lorcan ends up coming up behind him and throwing him overhead with a half and half suplex! Now Wyatt is down and Lorcan flips him over to make the pin.
1 . . .
2 . . .
3 . . .
Tony Chimel: Here is your winner, Oney Lorcan!
Mauro Ranallo: Noam Dar, take notice.
Corey Graves: It's one match against a guy who lost just as quickly last week, I wouldn't get too ahead of myself. Dar has to face the Intercontinental Champion later tonight so if you ask me, I think we know which one has a brighter future here.
Lorcan gets his arm raised, satisfied with the win and yet still hungry for more as the show rolls on.
As the feed fades from one segment to another, the muffled clashing of swords is heard slightly to the keen of hearing. Suddenly upon the feed appears a single man, the singular man was decked out from shoulder to toe in the armour of the Knights Templar, tabard and all, that singular man was Chris Brookes. The Calamari Catch King was kneeling down, his right hand holding his blade, as Chris' other hand rest slightly off from his knee. His eyes locked directly onto the pommel of his sword, Brookes ignored the camera by his side, instead beginning to speak.
Brookes: So, you wish to join me, I can tell. Come join me on my venture to find the Holy Grail, to find the one thing other men could not, my own, the infidels and the like. How daring of you, how daring indeed. Though I can assure you that I will indeed find the Grail on this day. I will, not a heretic. And so we must leave now, but please, one moment first.
Brookes would lean closer to the sword, pressing his forehead on the pommel as he closed his eyes, reciting the line...
Brookes: Non nobis, Domine... non nobis... Sed Nomini tuo da gloriam.
After that short line, he would open his eyes once more, bringing his right hand up the sword and grasping the grip tightly, using it to help push himself upward. Nigh immediately afterwards, Brookes would slowly walk toward the door of the small-ish room that he resided in for that moment and also sheathe his rather long sword. When reaching the door, Chris would grasp the handle with his right hand, opening it toward his before stepping outside, not waiting for the camera crew at all. The door clearly hit the cameraman on the ass on the way out, as you could probably tell by the fact that he jolted forward a slight bit, regardless, he continued to walk with Chris, who was still a good 4 feet in front of him. The Calamari Catch King (or shall I say the Calamari Catch Templar) turned a corner, and as the cameraman did so too, the scene showed the burnt, charred remains of a fine house, or at least, it was a fine house. Brookes stopped in his tracks, and the cameraman walked in front of him to get a good shot.
Brookes: Do you know what happened here? Do you know what pain was caused by this?
The camera swept from left to right, obviously indicating the cameraman was shaking his head.
Brookes: And neither do I, to be honest.
Brookes would step forward, going through the open and scorched door. He would instantly notice a box, the box had a gold trim, and whilst surrounded by damaged items, the box had no damage inflicted upon it whatsoever. Chris jogged toward it, picking it up as soon as he could.
Brookes: This is it! This is the Holy Grail! You have just witnessed someone find the Grail in person.
Chris would slowly walk out of the home, waiting no time to kneel, and put the box onto the ground in front of him, as he slowly cracked the box open, a golden light surrounded the chest as it opened. Brookes, instead of being a dramatic bastard, decided to throw open the chest, and inside lay only a note that rest upon some grains of rice, and what else would read upon the note other than...
Brookes: Hey, it speaks the truth...
Brookes would say before jumping up, pointing and laughing at the camera.
Brookes: Ha! Fuck you Drew! Fuckin' knobhead!
The feed would slowly fade out and onto the next segment as Chris' laughter could be heard in the background for a while.
As Revolution continues, things head to an area where Minoru Suzuki and El Desperado are standing by.
Minoru Suzuki: Tonight is a special preview, a short glimpse of the horrors which will be inflicted on the horror king come Backlash but it is still only a preview, so remember that for every chop he will have to suffer tonight he will suffer ten more at Backlash, for every brain cell he will lose tonight he will lose ten times that at Backlash, and for every second he is put in the sleeper tonight, he will be put sixty times that at Backlash.
El Desperado is silent through this as Suzuki looks in his direction without turning to face him for a moment before continuing.
Minoru Suzuki: And I did not forget about my other opponents, oh no, John Morrison and Chris Jericho would regret the day they decided to answer the management's call and team up with Vinny Marseglia and the management will regret the day thought were even thinking about putting these lesser men in the ring with me, Desperado, tell me their records.
Despy still says nothing, even though Suzuki steered the conversation towards him being allowed to say something. Minoru turns around angrily.
Minoru Suzuki: What did I...
As Suzuki turns around, Despy punches him in the face. This rocks Minoru a bit but he’s mostly angered as he returns with his own punch at the same time Despy throws another and the two are peppering each other with stiff strikes.
Tom Phillips: What’s going on back there? El Desperado has turned on his master!
Despy leaps back suddenly and delivers a low blow to Suzuki, who slinks to his knees. He suddenly reaches up to his face and grabs the bottom of the mask, peeling it off and throwing it to the ground.
Mauro Ranallo: MAMMA MIA, THAT’S VINNY MARSEGLIA!
Suzuki is even angrier now as he charges Vinny who sidesteps and throws him into the wall. Suzuki turns around after impact is made and Vinny delivers a knee to the abdomen, knocking the wind out of Minoru as he slinks down the wall. Vinny bends at the knees and crouches next to him.
Vinny Marseglia: That breathless feeling? Get used to it because...
Suzuki palms his face and pushes Vinny back, getting up as Vinny’s knocked to a seated position. Suzuki takes off running and delivers a stiff kick to the face, laying Vinny out. He delivers a stomp down into Vinny’s abdomen and Vinny cries out in pain.
Corey Graves: Vinny got cocky and look what it’s gotten him!
At the height of the scream, it gradually turns into laughter as it’s seen that he grabbed Suzuki’s foot short of impact and was feigning the pain as he gets up in one quick motion, flipping the foot and sending Suzuki off balance for a moment. Vinny charges and leaps up, going for the Jump Scare but Suzuki catches him at the height of it and reverses to hold Vinny in a delayed Vertical Suplex.
Vinny slips out and flips onto his feet and quickly tries to get a hold of Suzuki's back to deliver a Saito Suplex, Suzuki takes advantage of the brief moment Vinny’s equilibrium is off and manages to slip out of Vinny's grip while grabbing him by the head and then choking him out with the Sleeper! Vinny struggles for a few seconds before succumbing to Minoru's vice like hands and falling unconscious, Suzuki gets up and spits on Vinny before walking off as Revolution continues.
The music of The Usos is continuing to play throughout the arena, as they are here already in the ring, and have already made their entrance in the commercial break. Tony Chimel begins to announce the match to the arena, and to the audience at home, about this matchup.
Tony Chimel: The following contest is a tag team matchup, scheduled for one fall, in the ring at this time, from San Francisco, California, at a combined weight of 479 pounds, Jimmy Uso and Jey Uso, the Uso Brothers!
The Usos raise up their hands showboating off to the crowd, as they cheer for their beloved heroes ahead of their matchup. The Usos then settle down in the corner for their opponents to come out.
"PhotoVision" by Kavinsky bangs throughout the arena speakers as the fans in attendance begin to give their reaction to Joey Janela and Penelope Ford as they step out onto the stage. Janela wearing his usual leather jacket and Pit Viper sunglasses, Penelope in another rather revealing outfit. They embrace in a prolonged kiss before starting the march towards the ring. As he walks down the ramp, Joey spouts off all sorts of trash talk, even laughing at his own jokes.
Tony Chimel: "Making his way to the ring, from Hazlet Township, New Jersey, he is accompanied by his girlfriend, The Bad Girl Penelope Ford, weighing in at 183 pounds! HE IS THE BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD BOY! JOEY JANELAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!"
Janela and Penelope finally make it to the ring. Joey hops onto the apron, then helps Penelope up and into the ring. Joey walks around the ring talking even more trash before he finally meets Ms. Ford in the middle of the ring and begin to make out in the ring. This only lasts for a few seconds before Janela finally breaks away with a cocky grin on his face as he waits for his opponent.
Tony Chimel: From Camden, England weighing in at 196 pounds, "Pain" Jimmy Havoc!
We see Jimmy coming down the ramp while receiving middle fingers from some members of the crowd, then jimmy turns to the ones giving him a middle finger, this scaring them, who then sit on their chairs, after doing this Jimmy enters the ring and does a smile across the ring to the Usos, and stands still in the ring as his music cuts off. Jimmy Uso and Jimmy Havoc begin.
DING! DING!
As the bell rings, Havoc rolls his wrists in his hands while maintaining eye contact with Uso across the ring. Uso then steps in and then gets a bit of a fighting stance and waits for Havoc to meet him in the middle of the ring. Havoc finishes his warmups, and then walks up forward into the middle of the ring and locks up with him.
Corey Graves: The start to this matchup, the tensions between Janela and Havoc have been looming, and this matchup must’ve rubbed Janela up the wrong way, so much that he didn’t even bother to show up to the pre match conference.
The two tighten up, and stand their ground, both take the same posture leaning into themselves. Uso slightly leans back from the pressure and power Havoc is pushing into him, but then Havoc gets the same pressure powered back to him, and they reach equilibrium. Uso then digs his feet into the ground and begins to push him back to the ropes.
Havoc then stuns Uso from pushing him too far back to the ropes, and digs his foot into the mat. He then throws his right arm up, and turns in on the other arm in the lockup position and grabs the wrist in tight and wrenches it behind his shoulder, and makes Uso fall back down to the mat and make it grounded.
Tom Phillips: Is every British wrestler equipped with these technical basics in knowledge? If so it’s impressive.
Corey Graves: Well, it’s rare that you see a British wrestler who doesn’t know anything about technical wrestling, and Jimmy Havoc seems to not be that exception.
Havoc tightens in the hold on the wrist pulling it back down with it locked tight into his leg. Havoc then sweeps his foot in slightly, and raises back up to his feet. He then stands still, and suddenly jumps up and stomps down on the elbow of Uso. Uso immediately clenches in on his elbow from the vicious stomp, and heads over to the bottom rope to get away from him.
Havoc then runs over to the grounded Uso and lays a stomp into him across his chin, shoving him back into the ropes. Havoc then pulls the arm of Uso hard back up to his feet, and then whips him over to his corner. Havoc then turns Uso around to face the turnbuckle and lifts him up to sit up on the ropes facing out, but suddenly Janela tags himself in!
Corey Graves: Outrageous, Jimmy was about to do some damage, why would you do that Joey?!
Janela then climbs through the ropes and Havoc seems to be completely and utterly disgusted at Janela’s choice to tag in when he was going to deal some devastating offense. Havoc then pushes Janela, and climbs through the ropes. Janela then begins to argue back with Havoc at the blatant showing of disrespect.
Janela then taunts Havoc, and Havoc flips him off, but Janela blanks it. Janela heads over to the suspended up in the turnbuckles Jimmy, and grabs him by the head, and lifts him out of the turnbuckles onto his feet. Janela tucks him under his arm and then leads him over to the middle of the ring, and then raises one of his arms high up in the air for the crowd to boo him.
Mauro Ranallo: It still isn’t clear why Janela would try and antagonise Havoc like that with tagging in so sporadically during the match, miscommunications like these between the team will end up costing them.
Janela releases Jimmy beside him, and hoists him up on his shoulders for a potential Death Valley Driver, but Jimmy quickly throws an elbow colliding with the side of Janela’s face, and then another one, stunning him slightly. Jimmy then throws a final elbow to fully wiggle free off the shoulders of Janela, and falls onto his knees.
Jimmy then stands up after landing on his knees, and then leans back, and delivers a massive knife edge chop, echoing throughout the arena with the devastating impact. Jimmy then gives another, and stuns Janela fully back to the ropes, and then Uso grabs the arm of Janela, and throws him over to the other side of the ring to make him bounce off the ropes.
Janela bounces off the other side, and Uso ducks the club attempt from Janela to try and get a rebound, and then suddenly Jimmy spins around and jumps up, colliding with Janela on the way back with a massive jumping clothesline attempt. Janela gets laid out to the mat, and then Jimmy Uso postures back up to his feet to rally up the crowd and hype them up.
Tom Phillips: The beginning of this matchup was all Jimmy Havoc, and now that Janela couldn’t cooperate in the team, he’s paying the price.
Penelope on the outside pounds the ring apron in encouragement for her man to try and get back in this one, and Uso signals for her to back off from the hype. Jimmy then grabs Janela by the head and leads him over to the corner, where Jey grabs the arms of him, and lays in a shot to the midsection.
Jimmy Uso tags out to Jey Uso, and they switch positions. Jey places his foot firmly under Janela’s jaw, and pushes him up into the corner, while Jimmy scales back on the apron, and then runs up, and hits a big enziguri from the corner area to the back of Janela’s head sandwiching it together with boots.
Mauro Ranallo: It’s fair to say that The Usos are back in this contest for a while.
Jey Uso then lays in another club to the midsection of Janela and then snapmares him down to the mat. Jey then takes a step back and runs up to Janela and hits him with a spinal tap, making Janela scream in pain from the impact. Uso then pushes back the chest of Janela to the mat and goes over hooking the leg for the cover.
One…
Janela kicks out at one, but Jey immediately locks him in a resthold headlock when he sits up out of the headlock, and rests his knee against his back. Penelope on the outside reaches under the bottom rope and tries to will him back to his feet so that he can tag out to Havoc once more. Jey wrenches back on the hold.
Tom Phillips: A nice methodical wearing down by Jey Uso on Joey Janela to make him damaged enough for the end of this matchup.
Janela shuffles up to a knee, and swings an elbow back to the midsection of Jey still holding onto the headlock. Janela then gains a bit more footing, and then lays in another elbow into the midsection of Jey, and due to the amount of damage Janela is relentlessly giving to him, he releases the headlock. Janela then jumps up and hits an enziguri ringing on the side of his head.
Mauro Ranallo: This could be Janela’s opportunity to tag out to Havoc here!
Corey Graves: The Usos are however only temporarily stunned, even if he makes the tag, they’ll still have to deal with them.
Havoc reaches out his arm for the tag with Janela, and he begins to crawl closer in to make the tag, Jey is still stunned, checking his head after that enziguri. Janela goes up and makes it over to the corner, crawling closer and closer readying himself for a hot tag on the Usos here, Janela then jumps but suddenly Havoc jumps off the apron making the tag miss.
Tom Phillips: What?! Is he seriously going to leave him high and dry like that?!
Corey Graves: It seems like Jimmy Havoc has had enough of Joey Janela’s antics and won’t work with him to make him get a victory. Good on him.
Havoc begins to walk out, and Penelope tries to reason with him, but he completely ignores her leaving. Janela, while still looking shocked in the ring, lays in a cobra position pushing up with his hands, and then Jey Uso comes over to him and stomps his head back down to the mat. Uso also glares down the ramp at Havoc leaving him, and knows he needs to get the job done and capitalise on this.
Uso grabs Janela by the waist, and then pulls him fully up to his feet. Uso then grabs him by the arm and whips him over to the ropes, but on returnal Janela swings for a club but Uso ducks it, and hooks his arms up in a full nelson and picks him up, slamming him back down to the mat with a Full Nelson Bomb.
Uso stands fully up and then chants up in the air “UCE” and then the crowd returns with an “OOHS”. Janela goes over to the ropes and gets himself back up to his feet, and immediately runs at Uso to try and return to make some offense to make this an upset victory, but Jey pops him up and drops him hard down to the mat with a samoan drop!
Jey then picks him by the head, and then scoops him up slightly and slams him down to the mat with a slam. Uso then heads to the corner and tags out to his brother Jimmy, and Jimmy climbs up the ropes and to the top turnbuckle and flies off the top with a big splash on Janela! He then hooks the legs.
One…
Two…
Three…
DING! DING!
Tony Chimel: Here is your winner via pinfall, Jimmy Uso and Jey Uso, the Usos!
The Usos celebrate their victory in style and they raise their hands high, as Janela rolls out of the ring and Penelope cradles him up and throws his arm over shoulder, and leads him down the ramp. The Usos continue to celebrate, standing up on the second rope and encouraging the fans on. UWF heads elsewhere.
The camera opens up away from the ring and stood in front of the lens is what appears to be Noam Dar. However there are several things which appear very off about him. He's wearing glasses and a smart shirt, holding a clipboard and when he begins to speak it's in a completely different and more understandable tone from the one he's been putting across since debuting in UWF. Is this really even Noam Dar? Whatever's going on, the fans watching on the screen in the arena don't seem convinced by it.
"Norman Darnley": Good evening. My name is Norman Darnley, and I am the CEO of Supernova Technological Industries, also known as STI. Now I'd like to start by saying that despite the uncanny resemblance that you may hear and see in sound and appearance, I am in no way related to UWF superstar Noam Dar. Mr Dar is however one of several UWF competitors that has helped to fund some of the operations that we are currently running here at STI. Which is exactly why I'm here tonight. Now aside from being CEO, I am also Project Manager, meaning I oversee any and all ideas that stem from our genius workshop. Now there's one project in particular that I would like to focus on this evening, and that's the one we call this one the Growth Inducing Metamorphosis Programme, or GIMP for short. Now the purpose of this particular programme is to help provide individuals that have fallen on hard times with some sort of a backup plan if you will, in order to help keep themselves above board in both the financial and relevance department. An early disclaimer though, this will only work with someone who's actually considered to have real meaning here in the UWF So if you're a pathetic, dreary, discombobulated sack of nothing such as Oney Lorcan, then I'm afraid this product just isn't going to have the same effect for you. So hard lines Lorcan!
"Darnley" gives a hint of a chuckle but quickly recomposes himself in order to carry on with his message.
"Norman Darnley": However there is another suitable candidate who might just benefit from this treatment, and that's the reigning UWF Intercontinental Champion, Velveteen Dream. Now although he's currently the champ, our team of researchers believe that the chances of him walking out of Backlash still in possession of that belt are not very promising. Therefore in order for him to maintain both wealth and relevancy, we have come up with a variety of potential product solutions. Please now draw your attention to the screen, and we will show you all how we intend to help 'keep the Dream alive' if you will. Kicking things off, we have the Velveteen Team!
"Norman Darnley": Strength in numbers, dealing in multiples, you catch my drift. Now unfortunately we haven't quite perfected the process of human cloning just yet. We did make several attempts on some Dream lookalikes, but the results turned out pretty ghastly, and were probably bad enough to warrant getting the show kicked off the air. However moving on, we realized that another aspect of an active life is travel, and we believe everyone should be allowed an opportunity to travel in luxury, therefore I give to you, Velveteen Steam!
"Norman Darnley": Now I would say this is slightly more feasible, however we do still have to work out a few more logistical issues such as how we go about the process of attaching hideous human faces to trains and what not. But up next we have something that's more or less good to go right away, and it's something which plays a bigger part in our daily lives than travel. Without it we'd be lost and confused. I am of course talking about food. Plenty to choose from no doubt, but everyone needs their niche, so I now present to you, Velveteen Bream!
"Norman Darnley": It's either gonna make you throw up or help put you down. The catch of the day. But at the end of the day, we still have to take care of ourselves. Particularly in sports as it could be your last day on the field of play at any given time, whether it's through serious injury or being just plain terrible. But with this new brand of aftercare we've invented, we guarantee that it won't be your last day anytime soon. Ladies and gentlemen, feast your eyes on, Velveteen Cream!
"Norman Darnley": Great for warm ups and warm downs, hell it's even great for general every day use. A soothing experience for your sweet spot guaranteed. And testing has proven that it's suitable for pretty much anyone as well, unless your name is Oney Lorcan of course. It is a helping hand but it's not a miracle worker! So until next time, from all of us here at Supernova Technological Industries, I'm Noam Da... Eh, I mean, I'm Norman Darnley. Goodnight!
'Darnley' proudly smiles for a few seconds as boos ring out for him from the arena crowd and the camera begins to move elsewhere to continue the show.
In a dark alleyway near the location of the show, the cameraman finds himself being pulled into it suddenly as the face of Armando Alejandro Estrada shows itself.
Armando Alejandro Estrada: ”Ladies and gentlemen, I am sure all of you are confused, but please, no te preocupes por eso, or as you Americans say, don’t worry about it! For my name, is Arrrrrrrrrmando...Alejandrrrrro, Estrrrrada! And tonight, I bring you three men who will be entertaining each and every one of you in the future, and not by some cool-looking but unnecessary dives, or with any catchphrases,no...they will entertain you by absolutely destroying each and every one of those wrestlers, regardless of if you love them or hate them! And right now...I think I may want to showcase a little bit of that destructive force…¡Hola chicos! Baja aquí y muéstrale al camarógrafo cómo trabajas!”
From the shadows of the alley, out walks three men, one of which looking to be dressed “normally” in street clothes, whilst the other two lack shirts, but instead don traditionally samoan necklaces: one made of red flowers, the other a straight necklace with what look to be fangs from an animal adorned on the string holding it together. The cameraman backs up a few steps, and looks like they’re going to make a break for it, but turn around to Armando once again, smiling at the cameraman before tossing a fireball into his face. The camera goes dead, and all that is heard is the mauling of the poor guy behind the camera before the feed goes elsewhere…
Tony Chimel: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall! Already in the ring, from Ayr, Scotland and weighing 258 pounds... Drew McIntyre!
There's quite a mixed response as the Scottish Psychopath steps out of his corner wearing a smug grin on his face. His eyes sweep the crowd as he nods, feeling the energy of the place, be it positive or negative. He's ready to do battle. He turns to his corner and stretches while awaiting his foe.
Red light filled the arena, white spotlights moved around the crowd as the letters "CCK" and the name "Chris Brookes" appeared on the main titantron.
As the drum fill ended, and in came the band in full, Chris Brookes walked out from the back, slowly strolling down the main stage, jamming out with an air guitar to compliment Jimi Hendrix's guitar skills as he walked down the ramp before stopping at the halfway mark, looking out to the crowd before puffing the collar of his signature leather jacket outward, before walking toward the ring, as he did, Tony Chimel began to announce his name, though everyone already knew it.
Tony Chimel: Hailing from Tipton, England, UK, weighing in at 187 pounds. He is THE Calamari Catch King! Chris... Brookes!
Brookes would circle the ring, tagging a single fan as he passes by, he clambers up the apron nearest to the 2nd turnbuckle, turning around to face the crowd and the close-up camera. He hooks his arms onto the top ropes, leaning in at the camera, only stopped by the ropes.
Shortly after, he would pull himself back to the ropes, threading himself in between the top and middle ropes before running up to the turnbuckle on his side of the ring, standing up on the middle turnbuckle, tall, before sitting down and waiting for his opponent to get ready.
DING DING DING!
The bell rings and immediately Brookes strides confidently to the middle of the ring to confront McIntyre, who walks with calm, deliberate steps forward. McIntyre, used to looming over his foes, welcomes the change of pace as Brookes stands just one inch shorter but he's much smaller. McIntyre smirks as Brookes calls for a test of strength, and accepts it willingly, locking palms with the Catch King. It's hubris, and it costs him. Brookes quickly rolls to one side, releasing McIntyre's left palm as he traps the right wrist in a lock and then performs a simple armdrag to ground the larger man. McIntyre lands in a seated position; Brookes quickly traps him in a clawhold on the trapezius, trying to apply as much wrenching force as possible. McIntyre grunts, but fights to one knee and connects flush with a stiff elbow to the gut, forcing Brookes to break the hold. McIntyre then springs to his feet and catches Brookes by the jaw in a vice-like grip with his right hand, then full on shoves him the three feet into the corner. Brookes collides back-first with the turnbuckle and McIntyre charges, but Brookes gets a foot up and the Scot runs jaw-first into the boot, then staggers back several steps and gives his head a shake as he snorts with frustration. When his hair is whipped over his shoulder, the Psychopath spots Brookes leaping onto the second rope, and as Brookes leaps off looking for something resembling a crossbody McIntyre plants his feet, catches the Brit, and then throws him overhead with a massive fallaway slam! The fans pop for the power move in the first major reaction of the night as Brookes rolls to the outside, grimacing and bracing his back.
Tom Phillips: Holy! Did you see the force of that fallaway slam?
Mauro Ranallo: Gents, you two didn't get the pleasure of seeing much of Drew McIntyre while he was on Resistance, but having called many of his matches, I can speak to the danger he represents. Foes would not be wise to underestimate him.
Brookes walks to the barricade and holds on with one hand to brace himself as he pops his back, then heads back toward the ring, only to be brought to the floor by McIntyre as he leaps clean over the ropes and crashes down on the Brit! Both men land hard, but McIntyre lands on top and quickly rolls onto hands and knees as the official starts his count. Drew uses the apron to get to his feet, then grabs Brookes by a fistful of hair and pulls him to his feet before throwing him back in the ring. McIntyre climbs up onto the apron and over the top rope himself, a sadistic grin on his face as he stalks Brookes, who now is crawling for the nearest corner. As he gets there and gets vertical, McIntyre comes round and grabs him by the back of the head, then smashes his face into the top turnbuckle with extreme prejudice. On release the Brit staggers along the ropes and McIntyre almost laughs as he pursues, but Brookes out of nowhere catches McIntyre with an elbow to the face that causes him to stumble half a step back. Brookes runs at McIntyre looking for a clothesline from there, but Drew ducks and lifts him up in perfect sidewalk slam position. Brookes manages to wriggle free, however, and catches Drew with a kick to the front of the knee that causes the Scot to stumble and fall to hands and knees. Brookes then quickly rolls to his feet and runs, leaping and landing with both knees right on Drew's spine, sending the big Scot to the canvas. Brookes rolls the bigger man over and hooks the leg.
1...
...NO!
Corey Graves: Look at the power of the Scottish Psychopath as he straight-up throws Chris Brookes off of him!
Indeed, Brookes has been bench-pressed and tossed several feet, landing on hands and knees. Brookes scrambles to his feet and charges Drew, himself getting to his feet, then leaps in the air looking for a dropkick to the chest. Drew swats the feet aside and Brookes lands on his ass; Drew then backs into the ropes and comes right back full-force into a boot to the face. Brookes snaps back, colliding with force against the canvas, and Drew keeps his forward momentum going right to the ropes opposite before coming back and leaping high into the air, then bringing a hard knee down on Brookes' chest. The Brit thrashes in pain as Drew's weight comes bearing down on him, but not for long before Drew covers.
1...
2...
...NO!
Mauro Ranallo: A less potent display from Chris Brookes but the Brit still kicks out.
Drew sneers with contempt at Brookes, then lumbers to his vertical base and heads to the corner before getting hyped up. It's clear the Psychopath has a finish in mind as he starts lining up Brookes, now on one knee with his back to McIntyre, for a Claymore. Brookes finally finds his feet and turns just as Drew comes charging out of the corner, but when McIntyre takes flight to hit the kick, Brookes sidesteps and Drew lands on the canvas. Brookes is quick to capitalize; he drops an elbow on McIntyre's gut. The Scot sits up, but that proves a costly mistake as Brookes traps him in a sleeper hold! Brookes wrenches, quite literally trying to put McIntyre to sleep, but the Scot starts clubbing wildly at the back of his right shoulder, trying to break free. The blows become a little more erratic, and then gradually weaker, as the lack of oxygen starts to take its toll on the big man and soon his hand starts to fall. Brookes grins at this, torquing even more. Just as it seems McIntyre is out of it, however, Drew taps into a second wind and pushes straight to his feet, lifting Brookes up with him! The sight is one to behold as the mighty McIntyre stumbles for the ropes, Brookes' grip locked tightly around his neck even though his toes are scraping along the canvas. McIntyre grabs Brookes' fingers with his hands and starts prying them, one by one, loose, but knowing he doesn't have long left he simply throws himself toward the ropes and brings Brooke right with him over the top to crash to the floor outside!
Tom Phillips: An unorthodox tactic, but Drew McIntyre uses his environment to escape that sleeper hold!
Corey Graves: That's the kind of ingenuity you'd expect from a veteran like Drew McIntyre.
The veteran finds his feet relatively slowly. He's still trying to get enough air to get back into it, and unable to capitalize on the currently prone Brookes. He simply rolls back into the ring as the official starts a count. The count reaches five before Brookes manages to get up to the apron. McIntyre comes crashing in looking for some offense, but as he does, Brookes hops up onto the top rope and leaps clean over the big Scot. Drew stops himself with the aid of the ropes and turns round; as he does, Brookes goes for a Yakuza Kick! McIntyre catches the attempted kick with both hands and spins Brookes 180 degrees before catching him from behind to hit a picture-perfect German suplex! Brookes rolls under the ropes to the apron, but McIntyre is back on his feet and lumbers right on over, stepping between the rope to wash Brookes' face with his boot several times. The unsportsmanlike gesture draws a rebuke from the crowd, who respond with the most heat they have since the match begin, booing the ever-loving shit out of the Scottish Psychopath. After several nasty washes, Drew leans over the rope and grabs Brookes by the throat, pulling him up to his feet and then throwing him over the rope and back into the ring. He then walks right on over to the Brit, who is lying prone, and raises both arms over his head in the classic victory pose to roar before Brookes rolls him up!
Mauro Ranallo: Brookes has him trapped in a roll-up and he's got a handful of tights!
1...
2...
...3!
DING DING DING!
Here is your winner,
CHRIS BROOKES!
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Tom Phillips: One bad cheat begets another here as Chris Brookes gets a dirty win against the former Prime Time Champion!
Corey Graves: By hook or by crook, a win is a win and Brookes shows some shades of a former World Champion Larry Sweeney there as he uses the dirtiest trick in the book to get the W here tonight! You've gotta love it.
Brookes bails on the ring and is halfway up the ramp, laughing diabolically as he goes, before McIntyre gets to one knee and slams the canvas with his palm looking utterly frustrated and borderline homicidal as he glares between the ropes at the foe who narrowly stole a victory out from under him. The feed moves along.
The scene fades into the New Day hanging out Backstage. Well, Big E and Xavier are. Kofi is nowhere to be seen, but what seems to be a new interviewer is there, and he looks exactly like Kofi but has a nasally voice.
Chad Burgundy: Chad Burgundy here, and today I am with the New Day! So, how do you two feel going into Backlash already with a championship shot? Where is Kofi Kingston? Did you murder him for his secret pancake recipe? Or is that handsome young lad hanging around here somewhere? How does it feel taking on Sami Zayn and Becky Lynch? This one's for Big E, did you ever get Becky's mom's digits? Are you concerned Prince Petty is gonna mercy rule you in GM mode?
New Day, a little flabbergasted with the questions, hop onto them.
Xavier Woods: Uh, okay, just bombard us like that. Well, we'll answer in chronological order: We feel good! Getting a shot this big, this early on is great for us and I'm very sure we can win this match.
Big E: As for Kofi, we did murder him. We chopped him up to little pieces and blended up into a Kofi smoothie… after we whooped his butt in Street Fighter IV! Sent him to read them and weep on the locker rooms
Kofi Kingston: Man, you know you cheated with all that button mash- I mean, it's possible you cheated, Big E, with your button mashing. I've seen Kofi play and he's the best Street Fighter player I've ever seen.
Big E: Not if you saw him early today.
Kofi- I mean Chad Burgundy has a serious look on his face as Big stares at him with a smug smile.
Xavier Woods: I'm sure that Kofi is around here somewhere. Anyways, onto your third question: Taking on Sami and Becky is a huge honour. We are all major Bami supporters. Bami Zynch that is.
Big E: I thought their ship name was Secky Lane
Xavier Woods: It don't matter, at the end of the day, Becky wears the pants around the house.
All three try not to laugh.
Xavier Woods: But for real, it's gonna be an awesome match and I'm sure Kofi and Big E will tear down the house along with them. Four amazing talents in a match that Meltzer would rate higher if and Okada vs Omega went at it in some other universe.
Big E: And, as of right now, I have not got Becky's mom's number. Hopefully when we come face to face, I'll ask her for it. Knowing Becky, she'll most definitely say yes.
Xavier Woods: Then you must not know Becky too well then…
Woods mumbles under his breath.
Big E: What was that?
Xavier Woods: Nothing.
Big E: It sure sounded like something and a lot less like nothing.
Xavier Woods: Oh, would you look at that! It's the Velveteen Dream!
Woods points off screen as he hurries off and gets drags Dream into the camera shot. Dream is confused with a mug of coffee spilling everywhere.
Xavier Woods: Dream, hey there, buddy, I know you've been really busy today with being in the medical room and stuff. And you got a match soon, you got any words for Dar?
Velveteen Dream: What I want to know is why you're dragging me over here for your little skit. You're spilling my coffee and overall, not doing yourselves any favours getting on my bad side.
Big E: Oh, don't be like that. Come on, lighten up a little.
Velveteen Dream: Last week, the Dream got thrown into a coffee shop injuring my shoulder. Tonight, the Dream has a match with a little runt. Next week, the Dream has to then defend his title against a bigger runt. How can the Dream lighten up knowing all this?
Chad Burgundy: The power of positivity! Just move your hips and dance to the beat.
VEL-VE-TEEN! VEL-VE-TEEN! VELVETEEN!
The New Day start dancing as Xavier gets his trombone and begins playing to the New Day Rocks beat.
Kofi Kingston: Come on, man! We seen you gyrate those hips before.
Kofi breaks character to edge Dream on. After a bit of resistance and a loud sigh from the Dream he eventually comes around and does a couple hip swivels before scurrying off to get a new outfit for the spilled coffee.
Velveteen Dream: We never speak of this again, you hear? And take that stupid wig off!
The Dream snatches Kofi's wig, but Kofi doesn't break character as he finishes the segment.
Chad Burgundy: And there you have it! We have officially made the Dream feel the power of positivity - one hip swivel at a time because...
NEW DAY ROCKS! NEW DAY ROCKS! NEW DAY ROCKS!
Chad Burgundy: Back to the show!
The scene fades out with the New Day continuing to dance before their match Sunday and Dream shaking his head as he walks off to prepare for his match against Dar.
The scene opens to hear an ominous voice, a child’s voice. Very sharp and singing a set tune. Darkness begins the scene.
“Stars shining bright above you…”
The camera cuts to a skyline of Chicago, the location of Backlash, in the evening, no stars visible but very posing.
“Night breezes seem to whisper, “I hate you”...”
The camera cuts to the night sky, with the sky blooming right and a lone man walking across the back of the scene.
“Birds singing in the sycamore trees…”
The camera cuts over at some leaves falling off the trees, in a forest, showing some decay after time.
“DREAM A LITTLE DREAM OF ME.”
Suddenly the camera cuts to darkness, and begins to fade in with Adrian Neville standing up and staring into the camera intensely. The voice is gone permanently.
Adrian Neville: Dreams, left as figments of your reality. People believe in them, go live out your dreams they say. When you do, what do you reach? Disappointment. Why is that so? You didn’t limit your dreams to reality. You didn’t give yourself a reality check. You couldn’t. It was out of the possibility, out of the option.
The Dream was free to do whatever it wanted within your mind, yet you were the controller. You couldn’t realise. Even if you push yourself into the realms of being lucid, the freedom you have is a lie. You’re never free, not in dreams, and not in reality. No matter what illusion you are given.
Velveteen Dream will realise that when we head to good old Chicago, which will be the resting ground for him, and his tight grasp on the Intercontinental Championship. The grasp will loosen, and the man behind the dream will find out his reality, and it doesn’t lie within the UWF anymore…
Neville walks off the shot as the question still poses in the minds of those in the arena and at home, what does he mean by these ominous statements to the Velveteen Dream, what does the Velveteen Dream have in store for him at Backlash?
YOW!
Velveteen's theme starts, and Velveteen Dream comes out from Gorilla, looks at the crowd and poses. The crowd has mixed reactions to the Dream. They are impressed by his wrestling skills and promo work, but he can treat them with disrespect sometimes when he lets his ego inflate.
Tony Chimel: Making his way from Capitol City, Washington D.C, weighed in at 227 lbs, he is your Intercontinental champion, "the Experience," the Velveteen Dream!
Velveteen then proceeds down the ramp in a very flamboyant, cocky, way. Completely sure he will beat his opponent and whoever tries to mess with him.
Velveteen Dream gets into the ring and spins around making sure everyone can experience the true experience of Velveteen Dream, showing off his beautiful and amazing body and attire. Once he finished spinning, he gets down and rolls on the ground
Making sure everyone can see him right in the middle of the ring doing what he does best, which is being better than everyone.
He then gets on his stomach, pushes himself backwards, stares at the camera, and gets up. He then takes out his mouth guard and puts it on, ready for his match.
As "Morning Glory" by Oasis blares out around the arena, the sold out crowd in attendance makes their displeasure known as Noam Dar takes to the stage. The Scottish Supernova stands arms crossed behind his back for a few seconds before kissing his left wrist and heading down the ramp.
"From Ayr, Scotland, weighing in at 178 pounds, he is The Scottish Supernova, Noam Dar!!"
Dar performs the calm motion with his right hand to hush up the crowd members near ringside who are giving him an unwelcome reception before climbing the apron and scaling the top turnbuckle to perform the crossed motion once again.
Dar then drops into the ring and undoes his jacket in preparation for the upcoming contest.
VS 
DING DING DING
Both competitors walk right up to the middle of the ring for a lock up. With the size advantage, Dream easily takes control and places Dar in a side headlock. He tosses him over with a takedown but Dar is quick to wrap his legs around his neck. Dream quickly gets out of it and scurries back to his feet but he's tripped up with a swing to the back of his knees. He falls onto his back and Dar quickly goes for the cover but Dream pushes him off before the ref can even drop down to make the 1 count. Dar gets to his feet but now it's him to gets tripped up with Dream going for a pin. He rolls him off quickly and gets back to his feet while Dream lays low on the mat and pushes himself backwards with his legs open in his signature fashion. Dream has a smile on his face but Dar quickly goes to wipe it off, coming in with a low dropkick to the face. Dream ends up rolling out of the ring to get away.
Mauro Ranallo: The showmanship of Dream may have cost him there and it gives Dar the first opening of the match.
Corey Graves: The Velveteen Dream is a consummate showman but sometimes you just need to wear your opponent down physically and I feel like that's where Dar has the advantage.
Dream walks around the ring but Dar measures him, running towards the ropes and diving out with a suicide dive to take out the Dream! Fans boo but Dar simply picks up Dream and tosses him back into the ring before hopping on the apron and climbing up to the top rope. Dream rises to his feet, looking to be a little bit on wobbly legs and when he turns around, Dar comes flying off with a clothesline or rather, what could have been a clothesline because Dream dropkicks him in mid air! Dream tries to one up Dar and goes out onto the apron to climb to the top as well. Dar is getting to his feet and when he turns around, he's met with a double axe handle off the top rope by Dream! Dar goes down and the Intercontinental Champion makes the cover.
1 . . .
2 . . .
Dar kicks out! Dream picks him up right away and throws him over his shoulders, looking for the Dream Valley Driver. Dar senses it and starts to wiggle free, falling behind him and shoving him towards the corner. Dream is able to stop himself while Dar comes running up behind him. The Champion throws a back elbow that stuns Dar long enough for Dream to climb up to the second rope. The Scottish Supernova has other plans for him however as he reaches forward to grab Dream's leg and pulls him away, Dream landing face first onto the mat! Dar keeps a hold of the leg and pulls it up high, lifting Dream up off the mat before slamming his knee into the mat! Dream grabs at his knee and rolls out to the apron. Dar tries to continue the attack but the ref pushes him away.
Corey Graves: This is what I was talking about. Noam Dar knows how to pick his opponent apart. Oney Lorcan better take notes.
Tom Phillips: Let's give the Intercontinental Champion some credit, He's out lasted many an opponent here in UWF, we can't count him out just yet.
Dream uses the ropes to help him get up. Dar ends up running through the ropes to attack his knee but Dream actually jumps up to avoid it and when Dar's upper body comes through the ropes, Dream leg drops him onto the apron! Dar falls out of the ring while Dream stretches out his leg. Seeing Dar starting to stir, Dream comes off the apron and grabs Dar. He goes to toss him back into the ring but the Scottish Supernova gets his hands up to block it. He elbows Dream in the ribs twice to get some separation before jumping onto the apron. He comes off with a double axe handle, looking to do it better than the Dream but he ends up eating a punch right to the stomach that makes him fall to his knees. Now Dream throws him back into the ring, hopping on the apron and going up to the top rope.
As he gets situated on the top rope, Dar is able to sense what's coming next and rolls away. Dream lets out a sigh before dropping down and coming after Dar. Noam is using the ropes to get up and as Dream comes walking over, he superkicks him in the knee, making Dream drop down to a knee. Dar follows up with a DDT to drive his head into the mat! He flips Velveteen over and hooks both legs for the cover.
1 . . .
2 . . .
Dream kicks out! Dar waste little time in getting back to his feet and grabbing the leg of Dream, He pulls him to the center of the ring before dropping a knee onto the leg of Dream. The Intercontinental Champion yells out in pain but Dar isn't finished there. He spins around the leg, perhaps looking for a figure four but Dream is able to push him off with the other leg. Dar goes running towards the ropes, coming off of them with another low dropkick, this time to the face of the Velveteen Dream.
Corey Graves: What did I tell you guys, Noam Dar has just been systematically picking Dream apart. We may be the brightest young star we have here today.
Mauro Ranallo: Well you want to talk about bright young stars, look no further than the Velveteen Dream. He may not be in the driver's seat right now but he's proven time and time again that he can overcome any challenge.
Dar looks to follow up with another cover but Dream shoves him off right away. Dar just smiles and watches as Dream tries to get back to his feet. Using the ropes to guide him away from his opponent, Dream walks around the ring to walk it off. Since he's by the ropes, every time Dar tries to take advantage, the ref gets in the way. Noam argues with the ref and shoves him aside only to walk right into a superkick from Dream! Dar gets turned away and is stunned, allowing Dream to come up behind him and drop him with a hangman's neckbreaker! Dream lays on top of Dar while holding his leg in his own hands for the pin
1 . . .
2 . . .
Dar kicks out! Dream stretches out his leg before getting back to a vertical base. Dar is trying to get up as well so Dream helps him up before trying to get him up on his shoulders. The weight it a little too much for his leg and so he drops him back down and massages his knee. Dar sees this as an opportunity and so he runs at Dream but ends up getting scoops up and in one swift motion, Dream plants him with the Dream Valley Driver! The crowd is cheering as Dream hangs across the ropes to keep himself up. He then exits to the apron and starts to climb.
Mauro Ranallo: Dar is down and it looks like Dream is going up top to put this away!
Corey Graves: Get out of there Dar!
The Scottish Supernova hasn\t moved an inch as Dream situates himself up top. Suddenly there's booing coming from the crowd. Dream looks around to see Neville walking down the ramp.
Corey Graves: Oh thank God, I've never been so happy to see this man.
Dream motions for him to head back to the back but Neville just stares at him. Dream waves him off and leaps off for the Purple Rainmaker but Dar moves out of the way, letting Dream crash and burn into the mat! Dar gets up to his feet and takes Dream's leg, locking in the kneebar! Dream writhes around in pain and has no choice but to tap out.
Tony Chimel: Here is your winner, Noam Dar!
Tom Phillips: The Velveteen Dream had this match won had it not been for Adrian Neville.
Corey Graves: You don't know that, Dar could have been playing opossum the whole time.
Mauro Ranallo: Regardless, it was smart of Dream to tap out, you don't want any extra damage going into Backlash.
Corey Graves: Judging by Neville coming over here, I don't think it's going to matter
Neville has walked over to the time keeper's area and grabs himself a steel chair, he slides back into the ring. Dream is turned away from Neville and doesn't realize him coming up from behind. Neville raises the chair over him and comes down hard across his knee! Dream rolls around in pain but Neville grabs him and makes sure he can't leave. He takes the chair and opens it up, placing it around Dream's knee. He's got one foot on Dream's to prevent him from leaving. He yells a few words at the champion before stomping down on the chair and crushing his knee! Feeling satisfied with the damage done, he tells Dream he'll see him at Backlash before calmly walking out of the ring. Medical professionals come running out from the back to try and help Dream while Neville heads to the back, leaving the champion in agony as the show rolls on.
As the scene fades in, we see Oney Lorcan passing back and forth backstage; it appears his adrenaline from his victory over Bray Wyatt’s got him pumping, with a bit of sweat on him from his previous contest. Oney looks to the camera to speak.
Oney Lorcan: “Ladies and gentlemen, that is how it is done. I did as I said I would, and that’s give Bray Wyatt the beating of his life if he didn’t take me seriously. And, look what happened, look who was left in a pool of their own blood, courtesy of the Boston Butcher. Noam Dar, I know you’re watching, I know you’re listening. Rewatch the tapes, and take a good look at what happened to Bray Wyatt, and capture the image of him completely defeated and my hand raised in your mind. That’s going to be you at Backlash, Dar. With you, completely broken and defeated, and myself victorious.”
Oney inches closer to the camera, intimidatingly.
Oney Lorcan: “See, Dar, you brought this on yourself. When the dust has settled at Backlash, the only person you’ll have to blame for your broken bones and bruises is yourself. I know it’s hard to feel responsible for something for once in your life, because you strike me as a bit of a scatterbrain; but, it’ll be you that provoked Oney Lorcan into beating you within an inch of your life. They don’t call me the Boston Butcher because I run a meat shop in Boston, Massachusetts, they call me the Boston Butcher because I run a slaughterhouse in the ring every time a smug prick like you thinks it’s a good idea to bite off more than they can chew by instigating my wrath. So, to everyone that knows what's up with Oney, say it me:”
Oney throws up a number one.
Oney Lorcan: “ONEY RULES.”
Oney bellows his signature catchphrase before turning around, and defiantly leaving the camera’s view, while Revolution heads elsewhere.
The Camera's are backstage and we see a Masked Man facing the Mirror, He Speaks
El Ligero: For a long time nobody has heard this voice, nobodies known what I had to say or what I wanted to do but now I have the chance, the chance to show just what a British Luchador can do and that is bring a splash of fun to things, a hint of humour, a little bit of Wrestle Memery if you will - see I've faced all the odd's, Being told British Wrestling wasn't a thing and being part of the generation who made it a thing, being seen as too small to be a champion and Proving everyone wrong by becoming champion up and down the country and making it to here when others before said I wasn't good enough, said I was a joke, said that I should be seen as nothing more than a jobber - but I made it and made it my way, I did it by being myself and due to the fact that I love wrestling - those 2 hand in hand are what has got me to here and now I'm here, just wait and watch just what I can do, OLE!!!
Ligero stands up on the chair, jumps off and heads out of the room at speed with the British Flag hanging as a Cape round his shoulders dangling behind him
(Narrator) and So, El Ligero's journey begins, he will face many challenges and battles ahead, how will our Friendly Neibourhood Luchador fair? tune in Next Time in for the Adventures of El Ligero
Scene End
DING DING!
Tony Chimel: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first...
The New Sumerian Death Squad's music hits, and the crowd immediately begins to boo. Aleister and WALTER emerge from the curtain and stand at the top of the stage. Aleister looks out upon the sea of his critics and sneers at them.
Tony Chimel: From Vienna, Austria and Amsterdam respectively. Weighing in at a combined weight of five hundred and twenty-five pounds. The team of the Television Champion Aleister Black and WALTER. They are the New Sumerian Death Squad!
They begin walking to the ring, not paying attention to the fans. Well, not entirely. As WALTER reaches the end of the ramp, he sees a fan reaching his hand out. He haphazardly slaps it and continues on his way. Aleister doesn't notice this as they arrive at the end of the ramp and enter the ring, handing off the Television Championship and their respective entrance attires as they get ready for the match ahead.
Tony Chimel: And the opponents...
”Rockstar” by Nickelback begins to play and a loud booing ensues from the crowd as Grado and The Proletariat Boar come strutting our decked out in leather jackets and sunglasses and continue to strut their way down the ramp.
Tony Chimel: From Moldova and the Top End of Stevenson respectively. Weighing in at a combined weight of four hundred and sixty-five pounds. The team of Grado and The Proletariat Boar, they are the World Warriors!
The two men enter the ring and get ready for their first match following their change in attitude.
DING DING!
As the ring bell sounds, it’s decided that Grado and WALTER will begin the match for their respective teams as Boar and Black step through the ropes and stand on the apron in their designated corners. Grado and WALTER approach each other, WALTER looking as physically imposing as ever but Grado doesn’t flinch a bit, instead he chooses to mock WALTER’s stance and facial expression. WALTER looks unamused as Grado raises one of his arms and sticks up his middle finger proudly and defiantly.
The crowd gives a mixed reaction; some booing because they’re all heels, some booing because they dislike the World Warriors more than they dislike the NSDS, while others are cheering because they can’t bring themselves to cheer the NSDS either because of the World Warriors’ former lovableness or their strong distaste for the Television Champion and his ally. Regardless of the noise the crowd is making or why though, what no one can deny is Grado’s stoicism.
In the past the five inch height difference and seventy-five pound weight difference would’ve sent shivers up and down the lad’s spine but that was the old Grado. For better or for worse, this is a new Grado: confident, fearless, ready for a fight. WALTER senses this and doesn’t like it one bit as he takes a swing at Grado who ducks it and connects with a body blow to the big man.
Grado returns to a vertical base as WALTER once again tries to take his head off but Grado ducks in and lands another body blow. WALTER winds back with both arms, but when he brings he fists together to sandwich his opponent’s head between them, Grado slinks to his knees to avoid it then punches WALTER in the lower stomach just above the groin. As WALTER winces, Grado pops back to his feet and begins to deliver strikes to the head of the hunched behemoth.
As the strikes get closer together in frequency, Grado stops and does one big air guitar strum with his arms before giving WALTER an elbow to the forehead that knocks him to a seated position.
Tom Phillips: The Grado Shuffle!
Mauro Ranallo: Mamma mia! I can’t believe he knocked WALTER down!
Corey Graves: Lucky shot.
WALTER puts his hands down at his sides angrily and starts to climb to his feet as Grado forgoes another punch combo and goes straight for another Bionic Elbow as WALTER puts his arms up to block but after a few seconds, notices nothing has happened as he drops his guard and that’s when Grado connects with the elbow as WALTER staggers into the ropes.
Grado charges WALTER with a lariat attempt but the big man ducks and pushes Grado up and over, dusting his hands against one another as he thought Grado crashed and burned on the floor but when he turns around to admire his handiwork, Grado is up on the top rope and leaps off, connecting with a springboard version of the Wee Boot!
WALTER staggers into the opposite ropes and manages to put out one arm and catch himself and uses the momentum to charge Grado and absolutely demolish him with a lariat that turns him inside out as he ends up face to the mat. WALTER puts his foot on Grado’s head and starts to press down now.
Tom Phillips: Oh my! If Grado doesn’t find a way out of this, his head’s about to get scrambled.
Mauro Ranallo: Even with all that weight bearing down on him, Grado looks more angry than anything.
Corey Graves: Won’t matter much when he’s unconscious or worse.
As WALTER is putting all his weight down, suddenly Boar comes off the top rope and connects with a Missile Dropkick to the head that sends him staggering over to his corner. Before he can tag out to Aleister, Boar and Grado both charge, WALTER moving out of grogginess, as the Television Champion gets hit with a double big boot combination and is sent flying off the apron into the ringside barricade.
WALTER palms both of them by the back of the head and beats their faces together a few times. As he lets go, they both stand there groggily as WALTER lays into Boar with a vicious chop. While this is going on, Grado dizzily staggers into the ref who stops them both from falling to the mat. While he’s checking on Grado, Boar hits WALTER right in the jewels as the big man cries out in pain.
Boar suddenly charges, as does Grado, and they connect with the Gore/Wee Boot combination known as the Law of the Jungle! Boar rolls out of the ring as Grado covers WALTER, putting his feet up on the ropes out of view of the referee.
ONE!
TWO!
THREE!
DING DING DING!
Tony Chimel: Here are your winners, The World Warriors!
INT. BACKSTAGE - NIGHT
Chris Jericho: Hey Renee, you got a few minutes?
Renee Young: Of course Chris! Let’s just get a camera guy into position and I’d love to-
Chris Jericho: No, I meant privately.
Renee Young: Oh, sorry. Ever since Ethan started letting all these new interviewers onto his payroll I’ve been pretty much left out. You know how many interviews I had last week?
Chris Jericho: Uh…seven?
Renee Young: Nope. Not a single one.
Chris Jericho: Well shoot, that’s too bad. All these whippersnappers need to wake up and realize who the best interviewer in town is.
Renee Young: Really? Whippersnappers?
Chris Jericho: Yeah, whippersnappers. Hooligans. Knucklehead McSpazatrons. Anyway, about that thing…
Renee Young: Oh, yeah. The thing. What was the thing?
Chris Jericho: Remember when you told me that I could always talk to you about stuff?
Renee Young: Yeah. That still stands.
Chris Jericho: Well, I want to-
Renee Young: Hold on. It’s a bit crowded in here.
Indeed, it is a bit crowded. Chris decided the middle of a backstage hallway was a good place to pull over and chat. Unsmart. Renee snaps her fingers and the two are transported to “The Local Cafe”, home of coffee and such.
Chris Jericho: Where...What...How?
Renee Young: Transitional jump cuts, added in post.
Chris Jericho: Added in post? Are you saying this is pre-recorded?
Renee Young: Perhaps. Now, about that thing.
Chris Jericho: Oh, right. The thing.
Chris and Renee sit down at the closest booth to them. Chris sits on one side, with Renee on the other. No one else is in the cafe, for whatever reason. It’s just them together, to talk about the thing.
Chris Jericho: I took your advice, and I’ve tried to move on from everything. I had a great night, beat Suzuki, but I just can’t get over… this whole situation.
Renee Young: Well what’s going on that you can’t get over?
Chris Jericho: I’ve been having nightmares. They’re harmless - well, physically harmless anyway - but they keep showing up.
Renee Young: Who?
Chris Jericho: Mike, Johnny, Tommaso, everybody. How do I deal with that burden?
Renee Young: What you need is closure. Go visit them, see how they’re doing.
Chris Jericho: I’ve tried that already.
Renee Young: So try again.
Chris Jericho: I’ve tried that again already. Renee, I’ve tried fifteen times.
Renee Young: So what’s the problem?
Chris Jericho: Every time I go he’s in surgery, or needs rest, or it isn’t visiting hours. It’s almost like I’m not meant to see him.
Renee Young: Nonsense. Next time it’ll be different.
Chris Jericho: Dammit, that’s the same thing we always say.
Renee Young: And? Am I wrong?
Chris Jericho: Yes. You are wrong. Just like I was wrong in thinking this whole partnership with me and Mike would end in any way but disaster. Just like I was wrong in thinking that I could get my wife or band back. I’m destined to be alone, so I shouldn’t fight it.
Renee Young: Now that’s quitter talk.
Chris Jericho: Well then I guess that makes me a quitter. I quit trying to make things better for myself. I quit trying to make friends or fix my problems. I’ll just wrestle every week as a lifeless, soulless athlete with no desires or ambitions. I don’t need to be happy. I don’t need to enjoy life. The man upstairs has made that very clear.
Renee Young: Chris-
Chris Jericho: And I’m just going to keep suffering from my mistakes of wanting a happy life. I can’t even listen to his damn song without going mad.
Renee Young: Chris, listen to-
Chris Jericho: And all this in what should be the best stretch of my caree-
Renee Young: Chris! Shut up and listen!
A silence fills the room. For the first time in a while, Chris is without speech, leaving Renee to take the floor.
Renee Young: It doesn’t have to be this way. You need closure so you can get over losing your friends. That’s the first step to living a happier life.
Chris Jericho: And will that make the nightmares go away?
Renee Young: It’s a start.
Chris Jericho: That’s a no.
Renee Young: Well what do you expect me to say? “Yes, it’s a miracle cure.” I’d be lying to you and you’d know it.
Chris Jericho: I’m damn well gonna need a miracle at this point.
Renee Young: Then why are you asking me?
Chris Jericho: Because… because…
Chris has his reason, but struggles to come up with the words.
Chris Jericho: Because you’re the only friend I have left, and you’re the smartest person I know. If anyone can help me, it’s you.
Renee Young: Then why aren’t you taking my advice.
Chris Jericho: Renee, I hav-
Renee Young: No you haven’t. You’re looking for closure, now go and get it.
Chris Jericho: Renee, it’s not that easy.
Renee Young: Go see him and come back to me. We can work on the rest of our issues then.
Chris Jericho: I was fingertips away. I could have saved him.
Renee Young: It’s okay Chris. It’s over now.
Chris Jericho: No, you don’t understand. That moment plays over and over in my head. Every time I close my eyes I’m reminded of that night. It was supposed to be our moment…
Chris trails off, flashbacks to Wrestlemania filling his head.
Chris Jericho: I just don’t know what I can do.
Renee Young: Just go. I promise it’ll help.
Chris Jericho: You promise?
Renee Young: You have my word. When have I steered you wrong before?
Chris Jericho: Alright. Thanks Renee.
Chris and Renee get up from their seats, but before Renee can snap them back to reality, Chris stops her to say something.
Chris Jericho: I know I sounded like a jerk earlier, I seem a bit more self-centered than I’d like to be. I’m sorry for that.
Renee Young: It’s fine. I’m just a lowly interviewer after all.
Chris Jericho: No you’re not. Don’t tell yourself that. You’re more than just an interviewer.
Renee Young: How so?
Chris Jericho: Well, you’re smart, you have a great personality, and you’re a good friend to me. You’re really helping me through all this.
Renee Young: You really think that about me?
Chris Jericho: Of course! Deep down under than interviewer in you is a wonderful person. I just wish everybody else would see that.
Renee Young: Well I’m glad to hear that. I hope you realize that everything you just said applies to you too.
Renee snaps her fingers, and with the power of transitional jumpcuts, they’re back backstage,
Renee Young: Deep down, you’re a wonderful person, and a great friend. You just need to let that side of you out a little more.
Renee gets sidetracked by a producer approaching her and whispering something in her ear. It can’t be heard what the producer is saying, but it’s probably something important.
Renee Young: Well, I gotta go. Meetings and such. Good luck tonight. Remember what I said.
And with that, Renee exits, leaving Chris alone. For seemingly the first time in a long time, Chris knows what he needs to do next.
Fin.
Fans give a mix reaction as we see 'The Phenomenal' AJ Styles is with his wife Wendy, and his daufghter Anney. Styles begins to speak
AJ Styles: Wendy I am telling you you're going to love the new locker room that EC3 gave me. He gave me a personal one so that all these people won't bother me.
Wendy Styles: Boy I am sure excited. Anney are you excited to see daddy's locker room?
Anney Styles: Yeah!
Wendy Styles: AJ sweety where is the restroom? I got to go.
AJ Styles: Well you can take a left right here and there is the restroom.
Wendy Styles: Ok. Anney do you want to hang with daddy or come with mommy.
Anney goes and she reaches out for her father AJ Styles. AJ grabs her.
Wendy Styles: Okay I'll be right back.
AJ Styles: Alright don't get loss now.... Hey Anney how excited are you see daddy wrestle tonight.
Anney Styles: Excited!
AJ Styles: Yeah and who is the coolest wrestler in the UWF.
Anney Styles: You are!
AJ Styles: Who is the best wrestler?
Anney Styles: You are daddy!
AJ Styles: And most importantly who is your favorite wrestler?
Anney Styles: Johnny Morrison.
AJ Styles: Thats--- Wait WHAT!!!
Anney Styles: I like Johnny Morrison.
AJ puts his daughter down on the ground and he begins to talk to her.
AJ Styles: Sweety you do realize Johnny Morrison is daddy's opponent at Backlash right.
Anney Styles: I know.
AJ Styles: If you know than why is he your favorite.
Anney Styles: Johnny Morrison spreads wealth of knowledge you just ramble daddy.
AJ Styles: Ramble!
Anney Styles: Yeah just like when you play your video games with your friends. Don't worry daddy I'll be cheering for the both of you, and be happy if either of you win.
AJ Styles goes and he breaks eye contact with his daughter Wendy comes back from the restroom
Wendy Styles: Hey sorry got a little bit loss. Everything okay.
AJ Styles: Huh? Oh yeah everything is fine. Lets head to the locker room.
Clearly everything isn't fine for AJ Styles as the Styles family walks to the locker room.
WOLFPAC IN DA HOUUUUUUUSE!
The crowd erupts in cheers as the Wolf howl echoes throughout the arena. Scott Hall comes sliding from behind the curtain in his signature fashion. He pauses a moment on the entrance stage and throws one arm out to the side and the other over his head and pointing towards the stage as Kevin Nash comes walking out in all his coolness. Nash pauses to give Scott a Wolfpac salute before hoisting his fist up over his head.
The song “Guns of Brixton” by The Clash blasts into the arena echoing an iconic and it falls into practical darkness. The beat provides a steady rhythm and the crowd start to stomp their feet to it slightly. The British Bastard Adrian Neville is only near and awaiting his entrance into the arena.
“When they kick at your front door
How you gonna come?
With your hands on your head
Or on the trigger of your gun”
As the lyrics kick in in Adrian Neville drifts through the curtain, methodically walking down the ramp. He has no special entrance attire, just his wrestling gear. He walks to the rhythm of his music and doesn’t make eye contact with anything.
Tony Chimel: “Weighing in tonight at 194lbs, from Newcastle Upon Tyne, England, Adrian Neville!”
Neville gets down to the ring, and then turns to walk around the ring before getting into it. Neville then rolls into the ring, and puts his foot up on the ropes and then leans forward to taunt the crowd.
DING! DING! DING!
The match starts and both men look to get underway. They circle each other before Nash makes the first move and maneuvers Neville into a headlock - Neville bounces onto a knee before getting back up and slipping his way to the back of Nash–clutching the waist–, and wrestles him down to the mat.
He smoothly transitions over to the head of Nash, with Neville's body facing away from Nash but he's on top, and slides Nash's head under his arm. Both men are on four legs, and Neville begin driving knees into the head of Nash that slumps Nash down. Neville then gets to a knee and begins laying in palm strikes into the back of the head of Nash.
Mauro Ranallo: Neville showing off he is the master of technician here tonight.
Tom Phillips: He's just teasing Nash here - goating him, playing mind games.
Neville gets up and taunts at the crowd to a chorus of boos as Nash gets up. Neville turns around and both men stare each other down. Neville comes running in, and Nash goes for a lariat but Neville ducks under the way and hops on the top rope and goes for a springboard moonsault! Nash catches him on his shoulders and hits a running powerslam!
ONE…
TW-
KICKOUT AT ONE!
Nash gets up and brings Neville along with him by his hair. He rebounds him off the ropes and tosses him into a back body drop! Neville crashes hard as he holds his back and sells back up to his feet as he makes his way to the corner. Nash comes running in and hits a clothesline into the turnbuckle! He makes Neville stays in place as he begins laying in elbows into the back of Neville's jaw.
Nash then lifts Neville to the top rope. Nash goes into join him at the top, but Neville kicks him down real quick. Nash briefly falls back, a bit disoriented, and ends up facing away from Neville. Hall begins yelling at Neville, which catches Neville's attention for the moment, but he shakes it off. As Nash turns back around, Neville launches himself off the top rope going for a shotgun dropkick, but caught nothing but air because Nash sidesteps. Neville bounces into a seated position and Nash comes running in with a boot to the face.
Mauro Ranallo: That brief distraction there helped Nash out in the long run it seems.
Tom Phillips: But you must think with Nash's new attitude he must not have liked that if he saw what Scott Hall was doing.
Corey Graves: Who cares? Help is help.
Nash then runs the ropes and hits a leg drop! Hi sits there and the ref covers!
ONE…
TWO…
THR-
KICKOUT AT TWO!
Nash wipes the sweat off his face as he gets back up to his feet. He stares down Neville who's trying to get back to his feet. He waits there watching Neville rise up to his feet. He comes running in and scoops Neville up, but Neville weasels his way to the behind of Nash and waits for Nash to turn around to hit an Enzuigiri! Nash stumbles to a knee, and Neville takes the opportunity to run the ropes and hit a shining wizard!
Nash falls flat on his as Neville has a begrudged look on his face. He begins stomping into Nash repeatedly with his boots. Nash rolls over to the ropes as Neville continues the stomps. Hall pulls Nash to the outside and Neville begins telling him off. Nash tells Hall he can do this on his own and rolls back into the ring where Neville tries laying in the boots again!
Mauro Ranallo: Hall still not used to this whole being a good guy thing it seems.
Corey Graves: He cares for his friend? He can't make sure his friend is okay?
Nash begins to hulk up and the boots seem to do less and less damage. Nash grabs the leg of Neville and begins to shake his head and wags his finger. He scoops Neville up for the Jack-knife Powerbomb but Neville lays fists into the head of Nash causing Nash to drop Neville. Neville goes behind Nash and locks his arms around the waist of Nash. He turns him away from the ropes and uses all his strength to hit a German suplex into a bridge!
ONE…
TWO…
KICKOUT AT TWO!
Neville looks disgruntled as the match goes on and on. He gets up and begins rubbing his forearm into the head of Nash in the side of his face. He then stops and gets Nash up. He charges him into the turnbuckle and begins hitting shoulder charges into the abdomen of Nash into the corner. Nash falls to the bottom turnbuckle. Neville runs to the opposite corner them comes back with double knees.
Mauro Ranallo: Neville really wearing out Nash here!
Corey Graves: Neville is a vicious man, and he's showing it off here tonight. Dream better look out at Backlash, cause this is a rejuvenated Neville.
Nash rolls into the perfect position to be hit with the Black Arrow. Neville climbs to the top and eyes his opponent. He's set to jump…
BUT NO! Hall grabs Neville's leg. He kicks him off, but it's too late! Nash jumps to the top rope and belly to belly chucks Neville over his head. Nash gets down, but he's upset. He looks at Hall, and tells him off, he rolls out the ring to confront him: "This isn't how I'm trying to win. I want to win without cheating, man!" while Nash turns to the ring, Neville comes springboarding over the top rope and hits Nash and Hall with a crossbody. Hall is wiped out, and Neville gets Nash up and rolls him into the ring.
He quickly gets to the top rope and quickly hops off to hit the Black Arrow! Neville covers!
Mauro Ranallo: THIS. COULD. BE. IT!
ONE…
TWO…
THREE…
DING! DING! DING!
Tony Chimel: HERE IS YOUR WINNER… ADRIAN NEVILLE!
Mauro Ranallo: Much needed victory here for Neville heading into Backlash, July 7th, which you can get for $9.99 only on the UWF Network!
Tom Phillips: You can't help but feel if Hall just supported his friend verbally, then Nash could've very well won here tonight.
Corey Graves: Neville was going to hit the Black Arrow before the interference. Nash wanted to take the high route by yelling at his friend instead of capitalising on the moment. It's Nash's fault!
Neville hopes to the top rope as he smiles over his victory. He taunts the crowd as Hall helps Nash out of the ring. Revolution rolls on.
TALK IS JERICHO BAYBAY
TALK IS JERICHO
TALK IS JERICHO MAMA
TALK IS ME
Chris Jericho: Welcome back to Talk Is Jericho, the Pod of Thunder and Rock ‘n’ Roll, and tonight, everyone in America has their eyes on one thing: me. Well, most of America anyway. Some of them are watching those debates with like 30 people who have no chance of winning in 2020. So, I decided to bring in the best of both worlds. My guest tonight has been otherwise shut out of all public debates, and that’s very unfortunate. This candidate is running for the Presidency in 2020 as a Libertarian, and I think everyone listening should vote for him. Ladies and gentlemen, future President of the United States, Vermin Supreme!
Vermin Supreme: Hello Chris. I’m glad to finally have a platform to state my issues.
Chris Jericho: Well Vermin, that’s exactly what this is. I guess the first thing I should ask is what you plan on doing for this country once you’re elected President.
Vermin Supreme: Well Chris, I am a huge advocate for zombie apocalypse awareness.
Chris Jericho: That’s wonderful. I would hate to see my friends and family succumb to a deadly zombie virus in any apocalyptic event, so it’s great to hear you’re out to protect our nation’s freedom from zombies.
Vermin Supreme: Yes I am.
Chris Jericho: What about any programs you are interested in investing in?
Vermin Supreme: The way I see it, our federal government is overlooking a clear issue that needs to be taken care of.
Chris Jericho: And what would that be exactly?
Vermin Supreme: I’m talking about time travel. We need to invest in time travel research for the betterment of society and the future of this great nation!
Chris Jericho: Sounds like you’re looking out for our future. Not that there will technically be a future since the concept of time will become irrelevant, but they’re great ideas nonetheless.
Vermin Supreme: Thank you.
Chris Jericho: Now, the American people like to see results. What kind of laws would you push for once you’re the Commander in Chief?
Vermin Supreme: The absolute first bill I’m signing into law is one that forces everyone to brush their teeth. I’m tired of seeing people out there with unhealthy, yellow teeth. We need to regulate that sort of thing if we’re ever going to make progress in the modern era.
Chris Jericho: Well I’m certainly all for that, but I believe there are plenty of voters who wouldn’t support that bill.
Vermin Supreme: Well I’m also promising a pony for every American. That’s worth the trouble of taking care of yourself, is it not?
Chris Jericho: I suppose it is. Well folks, there you have it. 2020 Libertarian candidate Vermin Supreme, running for the highest office in the free world. Do you have any closing statements, Mr. Supreme?
Vermin Supreme: Please vote for me so I can have enough votes to qualify for the New Hampshire primary ballot again.
Chris Jericho: I’m sure everyone will. When we come back, some predictions, but first...
Chris Jericho: Alright, welcome back. One month removed from the biggest show of the wrestling year, the UWF is back with their follow-up pay-per-view: Backlash! Here’s the card so far as of this recording, plus my predictions for the show.
Lonely Orca vs. Darth Vader
Johnny Johnny Yes Papa vs. Style Magazine
No not that guy named Joe the other guy named Joe vs. Jimmothy Havothy
No not that guy named Black the other guy named Black (c) vs. Wight is Right
The Redheaded Stepchildren (c) vs. No not that black guy the other black guys
Yes that black guy (c) vs. Neville Longbottom
Vaccine Misogyny (c) vs. 1969 Suzuki TC-120 Cat
Chris Jericho: And, as promised, my predictions:
Dar wins by countout or DQ
Morrison rides the momentum he’ll get tonight with a win on Sunday
Havoc literally murders the other guy to death
Black retains, again, again, again
New Day finish running the gauntlet
Neville forces his opponent to succumb to his coffee shop window injuries
Marseglia continues his reign
Chris Jericho: But what about me? I dunno. I don’t really care. I’ve proven my worth by beating the number one contender to the top title in this company. If Samoa Joe want to keep sticking his nose in my business, then he can get the same treatment. If anybody else wants to stand up to me, just ask the long list of people, Minoru Suzuki now included, that have fallen at the hands of Chris Jericho. They’ll all tell you the same thing: it won’t end well for you.
You can listen to episodes of Talk Is Jericho for FREE every Wednesday and Friday at westwoodone.com.
The scene is black. Nothing is seen and there is no audio until, we hear a voiceover. As the voice talks, a compilation of different images follow as he speaks. The images flicker faster and faster as the duration of the voiceover continues.
??: "Every person in this world.. has a side of themselves that they don't show to others. The reasoning behind this.. may be that they don't want to hurt those around them and they're embarrassed of this other personality that they have.. but, see.. that's where they all go wrong. In my opinion, you gotta let that side out once in a while. It doesn't matter who gets in the way, it's their own fault for testing you in the first place."
The compilation of images slow down and die out as a figure appears before us. Small pieces of light peak through this dark, blank scene. We see 'The Demon King' Finn Bálor walks into shot wearing his signature jacket. Balor walks towards the camera and looks straight into it. He keeps moving his head around and fiddling with his jacket. Then he stops.. stone dead and doesn't move a muscle. He looks right down the camera with a cheshire cat-like grin.
Finn Bálor: "There's nothing wrong with bringing that dark side out every now and again, that's what I like to say. But, I haven't arrived here to talk about how I'm gonna decimate everyone in my way.. I've come here to do it, I'm not all talk. Every empire has a beginning.. and this is mine. The Demon King is here, UWF."
The camera begins to glitch slightly. As the camera glitches, Bálor is gone and all we see is The Demon King stood in front of it. He snarls before muttering few words.
Finn Bálor: "Know. My. Name."
The Demon King snarls into the camera as the scene cuts to black and the camera dies.
The live feed transitions to outside the arena at a local restaurant where Sami and Becky are having a meal.
Sami Zayn: So what I'm saying is, we get your mom to be at ringside since we know that Big E can't resist her.
Becky Lynch: How about we do one better, I call my mom, tell her to bring in a bottle of wine and give her my room but whoops, It's Big E's room.
Sami Zayn: What? No, why would you put that image in my head?
Becky Lynch: Look Sami, we can't always be buddy buddy with our opponents. We're the champs now. We've got to do whatever it takes to win. Just look at the rampage G.O.D. was on.
Sami Zayn: And look where it got them, being ganged up on and defeated.
Becky Lynch: Well how about the World Warriors, they just beat the New Sumerian Death Squad. Granted I don't know who they are but the name sounds cool.
Sami Zayn: That's Aleister Black's thing and the World Warriors got defeated by the Usos. Hell with their victory earlier tonight, I think the Usos should actually be next in line to face us.
Becky Lynch: Don't you get tired of being a happy little guy Sami? Don't you think it's time to bust open some heads regardless if you're friends or not.
Sami Zayn: I'm just saying I respect the New Day. I think sending them a woman, let alone your own mother is a bit weird.
Becky Lynch: Well if you respect them , you should be glad you're making one of em's night, maybe his whole life. I'm pretty sure E's a virgin.
Sami Zayn: How about we just discuss this later, we should really get back to studying.
Becky Lynch: We've seen like 500 of their matches already! I got a better idea. How about we spar. We haven't had any action in the past few weeks. I could use a crash test dummy to try out this new move I've been workin' on.
Sami Zayn: Alright fine.
Becky Lynch: You need to wear a Big Momma's House style fat suit though, need to make sure I can do this to Big E.
Sami and Becky head off to the car as the scene fades out.
Out comes the self-proclaimed Greatest of All Time, the Lionheart, Y2J Chris Jericho, with his usual fireworks display and light-up jacket.
Tony Chimel: From Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada... weighing in at 227 lbs... Chris Jericho!!!
Jericho heads towards the ring, showered in approval by the audience. The former UWF Champion embraces it, marching down the ramp and flashing a smile to his fans in the front row. Jericho high-fives a kid with a sign featuring Chris's best friend, The Miz, standing next to him, and hands the kid the scarf he was wearing.
Upon entering the ring, Jericho leaves the crowd with one final image before the start of the match.
Every light in the arena suddenly cuts out and the fans start to buzz, a low rumble washing over the stands as they begin to question what's going on as moment after moment passes. Then, an iconic bassline, the tap-tap-tap of some drums and a legendary riff begin to play over the arena soundsystem.
The fans are still unsure who this new song heralds, but some spotlights flare to life, sweeping over the crowd as Pink's voice echoes through the air. Then, suddenly, a silence so perfect you can hear a pin drop overtakes the arena, followed by a loud pop as the chorus of "White Rabbit" kicks in and the spotlights merge into a single spot at the center of the stage. A deafening pop and a blinding pyrotechnic explosion follow, and once the smoke settles, a man unseen in the UWF for many years stands with an arm raised at the top of the ramp, smiling widely.
Tony Chimel: From the Place Between Time and Memory, weighing in at 215 pounds, he is the Cosmic Crusader... Johnny Morrison!
Moments pass, and then the fans erupt in a massive pop for the Intergalactic Guru of Greatness, first-ever UWF King of the Ring and former European Champion as he makes his way down the ramp. He claps palms with the adoring masses. He jogs up the ring steps. He enters the squared circle. And then, after removing his accessories, he finds a corner and leans in it as he meditates, beseeching the Cosmic Gods for inner peace and harmony before the beginning of this contest.
As the lights go out, a now familiar combination of instrumental sounds is heard over the PA system for several seconds before the titantron screen lights up with an image.
As the crowd reacts, the instrumental building, screaming vocals suddenly come in.
”GET ON YOUR KNEES
AND BOW
DOWWWNNNN!”
As the screaming prolongs and the instrumentation picks up, suddenly Vinny appears from the back with a red balloon in one hand, his UWF Championship over his shoulder, and his axe at his waist as he heads towards the ring.
Tony Chimel: From Warwick, Rhode Island. Weighing in at one hundred and eighty-nine pounds. He is the UWF Champion! The, “Horror King”...Vinny...Marseglia!
Vinny steps up onto the apron, and releases the balloon as he leans back and seems to take in the fear in the air.
Vinny steps through the ropes into the ring as the lights come up and he gets ready to bring the horror.
'Demi-Gods' hits and the Phenomenal AJ Styles comes out from the back. Styles walks up the ramp and he looks into the crowd. The fans give a mix reaction as Styles goes and he throws up the P1
Styles puts his hands down and he walks down the ramp. Styles is looking around as the crowd and he looking to get psyched up for the challenge in hand. AJ always loved hearing the emotion from the UWF Universe. Styles goes and he slides into the ring and than Tony Chimel begins to speak
Tony Chimel: Already in the ring from Gainseville, Georgia. The Phenomenal A...J....Styles
Styles follows what Chimel says and he spreads his arms out as a flux of pyro begins to shoot off from the stage. Styles smiles and he looks into the camera and starts to talk into it as it zoom closes too it. Styles begins to jump in the ring getting excited for the match to start.
"Destroyer" starts to play through throughout the arena, the crowd stands up as the roar of the theme hits and you see the curtains fly open as Joe comes out on stage and starts to walk down the ramp with a swagger that matches each step with the beat of his music as he looks straight ahead with a serious face while the crowd chants in unison with the music "Joe! Joe! Joe! Joe!". Joe turns towards the steps looks at the front row as the crowd are swaying back and forth to his theme shouting his name, he smirks before turning around and running up the steel steps.
Tony Chimel: From Huntington Beach, California, Weighing in at two hundred and eighty two pounds...He is the Samoan Submission Machine...Samoa Joe!
Joe steps into the ring and in time with the announcement of his name he spins around taking the towel off his neck and lifts up his hand in a Shaka hand gesture.
Joe lowers his hand and cracks his neck to one side stepping back into the corner, he hangs up his towel in the turnbuckle and bounces on his feet for a moment shadow boxing as he prepares for his opponent.
the lights blackout and smoke starts coming out from the ramp as the signature guitar sound of El Desperado starts playing and the crowd went ballistic on him
He walks out of the curtain playing his guitar and carrying his boss's UFC world heavyweight championship pretending to not be hearing the roaring fans booing him
As Despy is halfway to the ring the song switches to the graceful sound of Minoru Suzuki's signature song
The crowd turns silent as Suzuki comes blazing through the curtain, his eyes dead set on the ring
While Suzuki walks down the ramp El Desperado snatches Tony Chimel's mic out of his hand and introduces Suzuki himself... in Spanish and only then in English
Presentando ... de Yokohama, Japón, el actual campeón de peso pesado de UFC del mundo y el hombre más malo del planeta ... Minoruuu Suzuki!!!
Desperado throws the mic back to Tony Chimel so he could properly introduce him while he plays his guitar, walking away
Introducing... From Yokohama, Japan, standing at 5'10 feet and weighing in at 225 pounds... the current UFC heavyweight champion and the baddest man on the planet... Minoru SuuuuzukiIiii!!!
He finally finishes the long ramp walk and without missing a beat, he bypasses the ring in front of him and walks to the other side, there, he gets on the apron and turns around to the crowd, clapping his hands and telling them to clap their own as a sort of insult to them.
"He turns around and enters the ring between the middle and top rope while The ringside choir screams:
KAZE NI NARE!!!!
Now that he's in the ring he takes off his towel, gives it to El Desperado who's waiting on the apron, they fist bump and Desperado jumps off the apron and Suzuki starts stretching, waiting for the bell to ring
VS
DING DING DING
Styles stands across the ring from the Horror King to start the match off first but Vinny points for Suzuki, wanting a piece of the challenger before Backlash. Styles obliges and tags him in. Suzuki slowly comes in while Vinny smiles at him. Suzuki pops his fingers and cracks his neck, rolling his shoulders before simply tagging out back to Styles. He laughs at Vinny while AJ hops into the ring. Styles and Vinny circle around each other in the ring but when Vinny comes around to the opposite teams corner, Suzuki takes a swipe at him. Marseglia turns around only for AJ to come running behind him and nail him with a forearm to the back of the head! Styles tuns him over and starts kicking him in the stomach over and over again until the ref has to back him off. While the ref is stopping AJ from going back to continue the attack, Suzuki drops down to the apron and grabs Vinny's head, choking the life out of him before letting go and walking away. Styles then walks over and tags in Joe.
Corey Graves: Here we go, the man who stopped Vinny Marseglia from becoming International Champion back on Resistance, my personal hero Samoa Joe is here to hopefully weaken him up so it happens again at Backlash.
Tom Phillips: You know for someone who has seen what Marseglia can do up close, I'm surprised you're so vocal about him.
Corey Graves: I'm a former International Champion, I can protect myself!
Joe pulls Marseglia up from out of the corner only to bring him in for an exploder suplex. Joe pops back up to his feet and rubs his nose before casually walking back over and picking him up off the mat again. He looks directly at Jericho as he throws Vinny back for a second exploder suplex. Marseglia got ragdolled with that last one and is sitting up in a seated position. Joe walks over and gives him a chop to the back, following up with a kick to the chest before finishing him off with a knee to the head! He falls on top of Vinny for the pin.
1 . . .
2 . . .
Marseglia kicks out! The UWF Champion rolls over onto his stomach, trying to pick himself up but Joe just comes over and rubs his boot in his face. He bends down to pick up Vinny but the champ comes alive and starts punching him in the stomach. Joe goes for a knee to the midsection but Vinny catches it, bringing Joe for a leg hooked saito suplex! Joe lands hard on his neck and he rolls around from the pain. Vinny meanwhile crawls over to his corner and tries to make the tag. Joe notices this and quickly tries to get back to Vinny but Marseglia ends up making the tag to Johhny Morrison.
Morrison hops over the ropes and kicks Joe in the chest to back him away. Joe comes running back at him with a clothesline but Morrison ducks it, running right past him to the ropes before springboarding off and coming back with a roundhouse kick to the side of the head. Joe rolls to the outside of the ring to get away but Morrison stays on the attack. He jumps over the ropes with a springboard plancha but Joe moves out of the way. Little does he know that JoMo has landed on the apron and when Joe turns back around, Morrison comes flying off the ropes with an asai moonsault! Joe goes down but Morrison is quick to toss him back into the ring and go for the cover.
1 . . .
2 . . .
Joe kicks out! Morrison picks him up right away and brings him to his corner, smashing his face into the top turnbuckle before tagging in Jericho. Y2J comes in and right away chops at the chest of Joe. Joe is wincing at the pain but Jericho just pushes his head back before unleashing another vicious chop. Joe walks out of the corner and falls to his knees and so Jericho comes up behind to plant him with a bulldog. Now prone in the middle of the ring, Y2J runs to the ropes, going for a lionsault but Styles shakes the ropes as Jericho jumps up and loses his balance, falling flat on his back. This gives Joe enough time to roll to his corner and make the tag to AJ.
Mauro Ranallo: So far the team of Joe, Styles and Suzuki have been working together like a well oiled machine.
Corey Graves: We knew Joe and Styles would work together but Suzuki has also been doing his part. As much as Jericho and Morrison might pretend to be good guys, they're not. And Vinny only cares about himself.
Jericho gets to his feet and doesn't realize Styles has been tagged in and is creeping up behind him. When he turns around, AJ lifts him up onto his shoulders but Jericho is able to wiggle free and pushes AJ towards the ropes. Styles bounces off of them, coming back with a forearm but Jericho ducks it, grabbing his waist as he flies by and hits a quick snap german suplex. Styles ends up rolling up to his feet. Jericho comes at him with the Judas Effect but Styles ducks it as well, taking Jericho's back and lifting him up for a back suplex except he throws him all the way back making Jericho flip over and land face first! Styles waste little time in picking him back up, throwing him over his shoulders before tossing him down with a neckbreaker onto his knee! He goes for the pin.
1 . . .
2 . . .
Jericho kicks out! AJ waits as Jericho slowly gets back up to his feet. He starts measuring him and when he's in position, Styles runs to the ropes in front of him, springboarding off of them, looking for the Stylin' DDT but Jericho moves out of the way causing Styles to land hard on his back. Y2J proceeds to run to the ropes, giving Styles what he originally intended for Joe and hits the Lionsault! He hooks both legs for a deep cover!
1 . . .
2 . . .
Styles kicks out! Not wanting to be done with AJ, Chris grabs both legs and pulls him away from the ropes before trying to turn him over to place him in the Walls of Jericho. AJ tries to fight through it, turning his body to avoid it. Jericho has to bend down to get a better grasp for more leverage and that's when Styles reels him in enough to start unloading with shots to the head before kicking him away. Jericho ends up falling back into his corner where Morrison tags himself back in.
Tom Phillips: The Shaman of Sexy is back in to steer the ship.
Corey Graves: Phillips, don't you ever call anyone sexy ever again. It sounds way to creepy coming out of your mouth.
Morrison hops over the ropes and runs right past Styles as he's getting up. He hits the ropes and comes back with a clothesline that turns AJ inside out! AJ Tries to hurry up to his feet and takes a wild swing at Morrison but Johnny ducks it and wraps himself around AJ. He then lowers him into a backbreaker before pulling him back up and hitting a side russian leg sweep, rolling backwards to his feet before going for a handstand spinaroonie legdrop! He keeps his leg on top of AJ for the pin.
1 . . .
2 . . .
Styles kicks out! Morrison drags Styles away to a free corner before stepping over him. He jumps up to the top rope before coming down with the Cosmic Calamity! Only problem is, AJ gets his knees up and Morrison comes down hard on them! Morrison rolls around on the ground while AJ uses the ropes to drag himself to his corner and make the tag to Suzuki!
The UFC Champion finally enters the ring and calmly walks over to Morrison. He looks over at Vinny while Johnny crawls over to him before throwing a knee right to the side of his head. He kneels down over Johnny and just starts smacking the shit out of him, all with a smile on his face, looking back towards Vinny until the ref gets involved. Suzuki backs up and lets Morrison pick himself up in the corner. Suzuki runs at him but Johnny hits him with a back elbow to stagger him backwards. Suzuki comes forward once more only to eat a jumping enziguri this time. Suzuki falls to a knee and so Morrison picks himself up onto the second rope but Suzuki grabs his leg and pulls it out from under him, Morrison's head hitting the back to the top turnbuckle as he falls down to the mat. Suzuki pulls him away from the corner and makes the pin, shoving his forearm into the face of Morrison as a show of disrespect.
1 . . .
2 . . .
Morrison gets the shoulder up at 2! Suzuki grabs a fistful of hair and pulls Morrison back up. He gives him a snapmare, leaving him in a seated position before taking a few steps back and giving him a stiff penalty kick to the back. He looks at Marseglia the whole time all while smiling and taunting him. He brings Morrison back up once more and holds his face in one hand. With the other free hand, he starts slapping him over and over again, turning his face red but with each hit, Morrison's coming to finally blocks one hit before delivering a swift uppercut. Suzuki gets knocked off balance and it gives Johnny enough time to run over and make the tag to Marseglia!
Mauro Ranallo: And here comes the UWF Champion!
Tom Phillips: You know he's been dying to get in the ring with Suzuki!
Marseglia runs right past Suzuki and knocks down Joe and Styles to make sure Suzuki has no one to tag out to. He runs back to Suzuki and takes him down with a clothesline. He pops right back up only to get taken down with another. Suzuki gets up a third time and takes a wild swing only for Vinny to duck it and take his back, lifting him up for a belly to back suplex but then falling down with him and driving his elbow into his heart! Suzuki tries to rolls away but Vinny grabs onto his foot and pulls him back away from the ropes. Suzuki turns over and manages to kick him off before getting back up to his feet. He slowly turns around expecting to see Vinny but Marseglia moves with him, just escaping his peripheral. Suzuki doesn't know where Vinny is until he turns back around and the UWF Champion drives his head into the mat with the Jump Scare! He goes for the pin!
1 . . .
2 . . .
Styles and Joe come in to break up the pin! Morrison and Jericho immediately come in to take the fight to the others. They started beating down on Styles and Joe but having just been put through the ringer, Morrison ends up getting his momentum stalled when AJ gives him a stiff kick to the gut followed by a rolling forearm shot. AJ then runs over to help Joe take on Jericho but Marseglia catches him on the way over with a sidewalk slam into a backbreaker! Joe meanwhile leaves the ring to escape the onslaught. Jericho runs towards the ropes and comes back with a baseball slide but Joe was waiting for him, pulling the apron over him and trapping him between the apron and the ring before proceeding to knee the absolute fuck outta him. Morrison ends up coming over and dives out of the ring with a corkscrew plancha but Joe kicks him in to stomach as he's coming down! He then picks up Morrison and tosses him into the steel ring steps.
The Horror King catches Joe off guard with a baseball slide of his own, taking down the Samoan before coming back into the ring. Suzuki is barely getting to his feet and so Vinny comes up behind him and gets him in place for the Farewell to the Flesh. Suzuki however brings his knee up and smashes it right in his face. Marseglia backs away into the corner, stunned from the hit and so Suzuki runs after him with a dropkick but Vinny moves out of the way just in time! Now Suzuki is getting up in the corner but Joe comes in and makes the tag. Vinny however is getting up from dodging out of the way and doesn't see it. He runs at Suzuki in the corner and connects with Sam Hane! Suzuki falls down to the mat and the UWF Champion starts to climb to the top rope. He's getting himself situated when Joe slides in and knocks off his balance! He then moves in and places him in perfect position before nailing him with the Muscle Buster! The champ is in trouble as Joe makes the cover.
1 . . .
2 . . .
3 . . .
Tony Chimel: Here are your winners, Minoru Suzuki, AJ Styles and Samoa Joe!
Joe gets his arm raised in the ring but looks down at the champion. He shakes his head before walking out of the ring. Little does he know that Jericho is lying in wait, coming out from the side and plants him with a Codebreaker! Jericho yells at Joe but heads up the ramp, leaving him stunned. In the ring however, Suzuki comes over to Marseglia with a sick smile on his face. Vinny is still down from the muscle buster and so Suzuki comes up and picks him up off the mat. He gets him in position for the Gotch Style Piledriver but Vinny flips him all the way over with a back body drop! Suzuki holds his lower back and tries to get away but Vinny is right there. He puts him in the Dragon Sleeper, trying to get him up for the Farewell to the Flesh but Desperado comes running in to make the save!
Vinny throws Suzuki to the side and kicks Desperado in the gut before he can do any damage. Vinny drives his head into the mat with the Jump Scare before turning back to Suzuki. The UFC Champion has rolled out of the ring and walks backwards up the ramp, making sure to keep his eyes on Marseglia. The Horror King stares back before heading up to the top rope. He comes off the Redrum, laying out Desperado. Vinny looks back at Suzuki, staring deep into his soul as the show comes to a close.
END OF SHOW
Credits
Havoc & Janela vs Usos - George
McIntyre vs Brookes- Crann
World Warriors vs NSDS - Dresden
Neville vs Nash - Max
Wyatt vs Lorcan, Dream vs Dar, Jericho, Morrison & Marseglia vs Joe, Styles & Suzuki - Danny
